DD is wearing me out!

[BugMacGee]

Older DD is just on fire lately. She has had meltdown after meltdown today.Everything is a super battle (and I'm mean everything) "Put your panties on." "No, you do it!" "Put your books away" "No you do it!"

She's being more aggressive with her sister and screaming/crying if she doesn't get what she wants.

She's always willful/stubborn, but something's changed. By the end of the day, I want to put a "For Free" sign on her head and stick her on the lawn!

*sigh* I love her but she's being pretty un-likeable lately

[Bonawich]

No advice, but lots of sympathy. My DS, about 2 months younger is acting the same way.

[konamama]

i'm glad it isn't just me - dd (4/03) has been the same way the past week or so, soooooo annoying! is it just a normal 4 year old experience and time a patience with some clear conversation will get me through? or shall i print up two signs and send one your way :-)
she is starting pre-school/kindergarten in sept at our new local waldorf school and i am counting the days!
any advice from anyone????

[Throkmorton]

I was just coming to vent...

About DS having meltdowns over every.single.little.thing! Of course, with a lovely combination opf the heat, pregnancy exhaustion, a 14 month old Tasmanian devil of a DD and a 5 year old who whines all freaking day, I am just a beautiful, shining example of patience, right?

I put him in a preschool summer camp this week to get a break, but it's just worse. I have to trek into town (1.5 hours each way on the bus) to pick him up and then he's awful for the rest of the day.

I was seriously expecting to see a thread about me in TAO, like "OMG, this evil mom I saw today, yelled at her kid and asked him to shut the hell up. Imagine what she's like at home!" Truth is, at home we're great. It's when we go out, i get tired and cranky.

[happyjuly3]

try "May"

OK- this seems like a little silly thing BUT I've noticed that it really makes a difference. My DS also goes to a Waldorf school and I've picked up a couple of helpful things. One of them is to use the word say "you may put your panties on"..."you may put your books away" and then just get busy with something else.

I makes the child feel like they are choosing to do the things you want them to do and takes away the power struggle element.

I found 4 to be REALLY difficult. I was also pregnant with #2 and had health issues which lead to depression/anger. This made it really tough BUT the 4 age was also part of it. For the first time I felt like a didn't know how to reach my kid. I couldn't get into his space and really be with him. We argued a lot. I was sad/angry/guilty about it.

He is 5 now. Things are MUCH better. I'm not depressed any more. He is much more cooperative (again) he loves his little sister and is the best big brother ever. Breathe in - relax, breathe out - smile.

take care of yourself too- if you can

[konamama]

i am finding 4 to be more challanging as well - maybe that is just the norm and it is my job to find a gentle path through it...
come on 5, come on 5, only 9 more months :-))

[konamama]

just spoke to my sil who also has a 4 year old and she is also finding the same of recent weeks - so maybe it's a phses that will end soon... just thought i would share :-))

[wifty]

My dd was born 12/03 too.....and is acting the exact same way! Its like she is going through puberty! She will cry for literally no reason....just be sitting and then burst into tears and have a fit. She tells me she is sad....but no other reason. And, she will do that sometimes a few times a day.

Some days are great....she talks more and is more fun....and sillier....and sweeter. But other days, I wonder if I have what it takes to be a mom!!!

I hate hearing 4 is worse! That isn't encouraging! I will expect the best....prepare for the worst! :stocking my cupboard with good wine: LOL

rebecca

[Ideesmom]

oh my.... my dd (01-03) is acting the same way. I want to pull my hair out. And, Daddy just gives in. Its driving me nuts. She can be so sweet one minute and then mean as a snake the next. Hugs to all you mommas in the same boat. We will make it through. Just remember to breath!!!

[cdahlgrd]

My grandma told me once, "At 1, 2, and 3, you can't imagine sending your child to school. But by the end of 4, you can't send them fast enough!"

I have to say I understand that now! The first half of 6 has been really hard for us too.

[RomanGoddess]

My DD (just three) is exactly like this when she is tired. Is it possible that your DD is not getting enough sleep?

[konamama]

was at the public pool today (after a rough morning) and was speaking with a friend who's boy will be 4 in oct and she has 3 grown children - she thinks that all kids have that "witching year", which can be different for all kids, her son was harder most of 3 and is now coming around, for us it has been since about 3.5 until now, a bit past 4... she also said that it started to become better when they (son-mother) started to get some time apart (he did some summer pre-school) and that makes a lot of sense to me, I am thinking that when my dd starts going to pre-school/kindergarten this sept that just by changing up the energy that this phase will start to dissipate. just some more feedback - hang in there everyone!