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Another month, another baby for the May '04 Mamas! ;) - Page 20

post #381 of 441

Sigh. Long day.

Jacqueline - I think the electric pumps are waaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than any hand pump. I have friends who were completely unsuccessful with the hand pump do fine with the double electrics. My ancient hand-me-down Pump In Style worked great for me. Also re:stuttering. I agree that if it doesn't improve in a few months, I'd get it checked out, but certainly don't worry until then. And FWIW, my DH stuttered as a child into first or second grade, got speech therapy, and now is fine. Totally not a stutterer at all. But I really don't think it is a big deal anyway at this age.

Danile - How is Isaac today? Hope the hurt is healing.

Lily is really dealing with death a lot lately. Everything in her imaginative play is dead or sick or dying or killed or something. It probably has to do with the fact that all the chickens and fish died while we were in Maine (ya think)? The chickens were eaten by a raccoon and the fish got too hot (bad fishsitter). She knows all this. She doesn't seem *upset* or sad, just obsessed with it. In her play, they all come back to life and/or are cured or just "go away." It's kind of interesting. I'm not worried about it (yet), but just watchful.

Can't wait to read birth stories!!! (Hint, HINT).

post #382 of 441
isaac is very morbid in his 'death' dealings. lots of his play is 'i kill you' 'i shoot you'. and if i show him a bug or something he invariably kills it. i'm on a kindness to all creatures campaign over here. this is why i wanted a girl :

so here's an uplifting subject for ya. what are the criteria for the state taking someone's baby away? i know a homeless 19yo who is 5 months pregnant and it isn't good. this is kind of the 'most likely to give birth in a chevron bathroom' kind of thing. she has ohp but she is literally and very seriously homeless. i have baby clothes and books to give her but i have no idea where she would take them. i think she's malnourished because she looks about 12 weeks pregnant. a friend brought her over to get some maternity clothes from me and she doesn't need them. i'm in a position to offer food or clothes or advice but i don't want to get caught up in trying to save her because she's a hustler. i've already been putting too much thought towards it (depressing). she's like a feral cat that can't be tied down so she isn't going to go for any maternity house program or something. it is all fine and good (well not really) to roam around when you're pregnant but i don't think she realizes she's going to need to BE somewhere after giving birth. i'm curious what the mechanism is for taking someones baby away. she says she wants the baby but i don't see the reality of that.
post #383 of 441
J, that's so sad. I would advise you calling CPS and asking them. Tell them of your concerns but don't lead them to where they might find her just yet. Find out what options are available for her (they can probably tel you about some programs, I imagine) and give her the information. You can't make her do anything, but as she gets further along, reality may start to hit her and she will need some resources. Then you can also get the scoop on how/when/if the baby would be taken away and TELL HER what you find out. She should be informed of the reality that she will lose her baby if she does not meet certain requirements. Maybe that will help her take a little better care of herself and baby. Maybe not, but you can at least try.

I'm sorry you are faced with this. How heartbreaking.
post #384 of 441
And Jess, please don't be afraid to call CPS on her if she is neglectful of the baby. I know it's an unwanted burden, but that baby needs you to help save his/her life!
post #385 of 441
Originally Posted by jstar View Post
what are the criteria for the state taking someone's baby away?
That is so sad.

Originally Posted by mamameg View Post
And Jess, please don't be afraid to call CPS on her if she is neglectful of the baby. I know it's an unwanted burden, but that baby needs you to help save his/her life!

Originally Posted by mamameg View Post
She should be informed of the reality that she will lose her baby if she does not meet certain requirements.
and : especially. I think that you may not be able to help her beyond giving her information to consider. Certainly, she should know that she has many more choices before CPS is involved compared to after.

On death and three-year-olds - my daughter has made many death comments since my dad and our cat died this spring. We have responded by being very blunt and factual if she seems to be asking us something. If it is play, we just let it be play and don't comment. It is interesting how much it gives us and those around us the willies when she talks about death. She is very casual about it though which may be the more spiritually advanced way to be.

BTW, I hung out with Miss Nuggets yesterday and it was a blast (thanks, J.) Our girls played very well together catching toads, playing with dolls, and jumping on the bed. The family bike is also a sight to be seen! I really want an extracycle myself now that I have seen it in real life. Total gadgetry cool!
post #386 of 441
jess: so sad. i agree with what meg said.

lisa: yay for hangin' with the MMF in your neck of the woods!

on the bike front: i SCORED a little boys bike, barely ever used (like barely even ridden once, according to the neighbor who sold it at her garage sale) for twenty bucks!!! marek is still like 2 inches too short, but he was so excited when i said oh, what's that at the front door? it looks like a surprise for marek, you should go see it, marek. and then he walks up to it and says oh, it's a bike for me! my nana sent it to me! and bill and i were like, ummm... no, mom and dad got it for you. ohhhhhhhh, he says, you and dad sent it to me? it was cute though.

screeching babe from other room with bill... hmmm...

have a snappity-happity weekend...

post #387 of 441
hEY everybuggy!
When that 19 yo goes to give birth in a local hospital (assuming she does), the authorities will get involved there. She won't be discharged until someone knows where she's going, I think. That is indeed sad. I worked in a local hospital as a postnatal home visitor (in my previous life) and the screening we did at the hospital was fairly complete at each birth.

Last night's show was FANTABULOUS! It was the last show and we went out with a bang--great crowd, great dance, everything great great great. I went out and whooped it up with my goils until almost 3 am! My wife was a little put out, though, because when I showed up to pick them up (Viet is like, no help at all, so no, they weren't at home happy in their beds) they were bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, both fully awake, and happy to see mama. Apparently they had woken up around 2 am.
Anyway it was really fun. I went to a BAR and I DANCED and DRANK and it was really really fun! Felt like the old days...I saw the dad of a lil friend of Sol's, he is a friend of mine too, and I made the comment that being out like that made me feel young, and he said, "we ARE young"...and I was like, whoa...he's right. Whatta concept. It just seems like so long ago I had the carefree life...
So I'm chillin on the couch with laptop and coffee and am very happy. Most Sundays I've had this post-show depression thing happening, and I don't feel it coming on now. Overall at this moment, it's all good.
post #388 of 441
ugh. i just woke up from a nap and the mdc picnic started 20 minutes ago. and i still need a shower and ebin is sleeping. not sure if i'm going to make it now dangit

i was wondering if it might be something that would happen at the hospital. i don't want them to take her baby but it seems like it would be a real possibility in this case. i assume they will drug test them. i haven't been drug tested at my births but i think it is something that is done when drug use is suspected. i believe she is mostly off drugs but i know she's smoking. i've only met her 3 times and the first 2 times were right when she found out she was pg.

ok. gonna shower because isaac wants to go to the paaaaaarrrrk!
post #389 of 441
Hey all,
Just checking in really quick.

A took a bottle from dh! With very little fuss, actually. This is kind of a big thing for us because dh really wanted to do that with G and we just didn't time it right and/or he just didn't want to. So, her taking it with little fuss made him feel really good. Granted, it was less than an ounce of EBM, but it was something. I have ordered a gently-used Medela Pump-in-Style with all new attachment stuff off Ebay (thanks to all your recs) and look forward (really?) to using that every so often. If she continues to take bottles, it just might mean we have a date night at some point...we've only had 2 movies out without Gabriel in 3 years (this is just movies...no dinner), mamas, so the prospect of a little more flexibility in this arena is hopeful.

Okay, I'm leaking, so A better wake up soon! Off to find something for dinner.
post #390 of 441
*sigh* newborn life...I am vicariously reliving it through jstar, jacq., and emmalola...

Hard thing of the moment: trying to find any scrap of alone time (I NEVER GET ANY ALONE TIME! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I used to spend hours a day alone, I need and require it for mental health!) and Viet not understanding, as he is alone several hours per day, and it has to be a fight to get him away from me instead of him just understanding...he does not get why I'd rather be alone than, ahem, doin' it with him. 'Cause that's all he ever wants to do with me, and gee, I have a LOT of other charms (vent #2) and things I like to do. We just don't have any we like to do together.

When it really comes down to it really really, the thing is that I don't love him or want to be with him, yet it's so "easy" to just keep doing what we're doing with these girls, and the thought of changing the arrangement freaks me out.
post #391 of 441
Oh, Elsanne, I hear you seriously about needing a little time alone each day. That's one part of parenting that I just can't get used to, and I fear I come off as totally selfish because I protect my alone time so fiercely.

Babymoon: We're doing well. I'm so constantly surprised by how different this boy is compared to the lentil. The lentil would nurse for 90 minutes then break for 30, the peanut nurses for 10 minutes then sleeps for three hours. It's night and day. I'm actually feeling pretty well-rested, under the circumstances. Even nursing has gone well- the initial pain is basically gone and now I'm just getting used to the tingly pain of engorgement that happens when my baby sleeps for so damn long. We're working on keeping him awake in the evenings to try to get an even longer stretch at night, but I'm happy where we are. What a freaking relief. Anyway, the babe is so super sweet and luscious and amazing and we're all completely smitten. And the lentil is taking the intrusion amazingly well. Sigh. I see now why they call it a babymoon.
post #392 of 441
Thread Starter 
Top of th' morning to you....

Ug, dh just had the crappy virus we all had. Like me, he had the adult version (5+ days, as opposed to ~2 for the kids). So we've lost ~4 weekend/vacation days to this stupid thing. Ug. Nothing like illness to make you feel unproductive.

Jacquie, I totally get you on the dates. When T was a little baby, I think I thought I would *never* use a babysitter. Well.. mental health (and marital health) sometimes requires it.

Alone time... that's why I blog (well, a few other reasons, too). I get to take a break, think about something else for a while.

I picked up another book from the new book section at the library which I should have left alone (The Feminine Mistake by Leslie Bennetts). I can't believe how two-demensionally she portrays both working mothers and stay at home mothers and how angry I am... :
post #393 of 441
Wow dude, wow. I miss EVERYTHING! : I suck!
Emmlola, YAY! Happy babymoon, mama!

Elsanne, I had a similar revelation lately, with all the shows and clubs I've managed to go to lately, it reassures me that I *can* still have this "freedom" and be Mama, too.

I am SO SORRY, I am thinking of you all with much much but I have just been so crazy lately! Things are good, relatively, I mean, you know, Rowan is *3*. I know you get what I'm saying.
DH was actually highly : with Rowan this weekend; it was humid and horrid out, Rowan was whiny and miserable, DH got the brunt of it (mostly because I was like "oh, gotta run errands, see ya!" )
And he was complaining lats night after we got Rowan to bed (EARLY bedtime last night), and I was just like "welcome to my world, dude!"
So anyway, this morning is a super-lazy one, another hot day, but MIL and I just arranged to have Rowan out there this weekend. Rowan wants to go (he said he wants to go "NOW!" but I was like "sorry hon, we gotta wait till Friday!") and Gramma misses him. It's all good with us!

Well, again, I have to go. But I am trying to keep up! I hope y'all don't think I'm a bad friend!

Have a great day, everyone.

Blue's Clues. Man.
post #394 of 441
Hey y'all!

Sorry I've been neglectful...

We went new car shopping this weekend... it's HORRIBLE! I hate it. We finally found a guy at this dealership that was nothing like a salesman whatsoever. He was very honest and was the first person to get our payments where we want them in the type of vehicle we needed. They actually got us approved... for 12,000 less asking price than the other dealerships we went to.. the only hitch is we need to come up with 1,000 dollars. (WHich was the same at the other places.. they just didn't tell us till the end part) So.. wish us luck in coming up with money out of thin air! : The cool part is the vehicle we're trying to get was actually owned by our close friends! We didn't find that out till halfway through looking at it. So we know it's never been smoked in and it's been treated/maintained impeccably. It also has really low miles and brand new brakes and tires! Cross your fingers for us...
post #395 of 441
Originally Posted by DucetteMama21842 View Post
The cool part is the vehicle we're trying to get was actually owned by our close friends! We didn't find that out till halfway through looking at it. So we know it's never been smoked in and it's been treated/maintained impeccably. It also has really low miles and brand new brakes and tires! Cross your fingers for us...
That's so funny that it belonged to your friends! Wow!
post #396 of 441
Oh TC- : : : : :

It's not for sure... but we might be in the Beaverton or Portland area this weekend on a small vacation... if so- wanna meet up for a little bit? Does Marek like swimming? Maybe you could bring him swimming in our hotel pool? Anyhow.. not concrete YET... but possible. You might be gone for Labor Day weekend anyhow.

Oh yeah.. are there any other MMF in the Portlandish area?
post #397 of 441
Danile: (first i have to ask, but i'm sure i asked before, but i've forgotten: how do you pronounce your name? is it like a dan-YELL, or dan-nee-LEE, or da-NEEL or something else entirely?)

ok on to other things: there ARE other MMF in the portland area: mcsarahb, and jstar and fiddlefern are all here. alas, we will be at the coast sleeping on the floor of our new-to-us-beach house! woohoo! so we will miss ya, but definitely another time.

and renae: you are NOT allowed to apologize anymore for your transgressions of not being the morning goddess anymore. no can do. life is busy for all of us. we come and go as we need and want and are able. no more apologizing! you hear me???!!!??? and that goes for the rest of you, too!

finally got the house semi-picked up after crazy weekend. we were supposed to go visit a friend this morning, but i've been having this crazy sore throat thing and it felt awful while i was laying down but got better when i got up for the day so i figured we'd still go. well, then she calls me and says she has the beginnings of a migraine and her 8 month old has had like 2 hours of sleep the past two nights because (she thinks) of teeth and she asks me if we can reschedule. i'm like... woohoo! heck yeah!

so now we are chillin' around the house, marek watching yet another pbs show, stefan napping after waking up at 630 (dude, i am not a morning person), me madly folding laundry, picking stuff up so i can feel like a human instead of an annoyed housewife, and ahhhh... peacefulness...


post #398 of 441
I believed it was a pre-req to live in the Portland area at some point in your life to be a MMF. Right?


kk, want to say how much it SUCKS to have an ill dh. I feel for ya. Hope he feels better soon.
post #399 of 441
Alright then..

McSarahB, J-Star, Fiddlefern??

No biggie TC- ENJOY that beachhouse. You've earned it. And for the record my name is pronounced "Da-Neel". I don't mind being called Danielle... but I refuse to answer to Daniel. :
post #400 of 441
Yeah, we'd love to swim in a hotel pool this weekend! Depends on where exactly it is, though...may have transportation issues (only have one car and DH may be using it). But let's talk - keep me updated! Also we are going to a cookout either Sunday or Monday afternoon; not sure yet.

OK, lots more I want to respond to and talk about, but must go attend to my little "lion." (She's been living in a lion costume we found at a yardsale the other day). Bye for now!
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