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Pregnant with #1 in our 30s August - Page 5

post #81 of 552
Too brain dead for personals, but thanks to Emily and Grace (I think?) who posted about the changing pad -- I think that will work well with our IKEA dresser (we're not doing the whole changing table thing either - no space in our tiny ranchito!).

Had our ultrasound today -- man, that tech was serious about the H2O!
Admittedly, I went to the bathroom *just* before she called my name!
(I was sure I'd pee my pants if I waited any longer). So I chugged a couple of cups of water before we got started, and that was sufficient.
Baby was a little shy, so sex is not confirmed. She gave us her best guess, but we're not telling.

It was pretty amazing to see the little Bean -- I was fine most of the time as she measured the limbs and the kidneys and the bladder and the head (unsurprisingly, my baby's head is larger than average - you should see my DH ), but I totally lost it when we looked at baby's little heart, pumping away. Most unexpected, but I've been crazy sensitive this whole pregnancy, anyway.

Afterwards, I said to DH "Dude: you're gonna be somebody's daddy!" :
He laughs at me, but I'm serious. I'm really starting to believe there's a person in there and all the discomfort and puking and hyperactive sense of smell will all be worth it.

Now to go pass out in the loving arms of my sweetie. Man, oh man, Friday nights just ain't what they used to be!

Cher
21w4d with biokid#1; loving aunt to N (8) & T(6); married to the most awesome geek boy in PDX
post #82 of 552
CIRC: emily, before deciding, i would suggest interviewing peds with dh. i was surprised that all of the peds we talked to were STRONGLY against circ. they are on the upper west side of manhattan -- not exactly crunchy in an anti-establishment sense. my dh is anti-anti-circ -- he thinks my political approach is anti-Semitic and hurtfully judgmental -- i.e., he doesn't approach it as a children's rights issue or a bodily integrity issue, just a parental preference where there is no right answer. he is deeply embarrassed by my vehemence on the subject and asked that i 1. don't tell his jewish relatives (none of whom is observant enough to ever have a bris -- i don't see how it is particularly jewish to have it done in the hosp outside of the religious context) and 2. don't mention it in public -- like he said he would walk out of the ped q and a session if i asked about it except in private. he thinks my anti-circ stance means i hate his people -- although he never in any other context self-identifies as jewish and it is i not he who is looking into exposing our dc to various jewish religious rites so as to teach them that part of their heritage. never mind that i first started thinking about the ethical issues around circ'ing from hearing an npr story in the late 90's on the anti-circ movement AMONG JEWS. i do wonder if majorgroover's point is applicable to him -- that he would never acknowledge that he is missing something and is therefore defensive of the practice. even when he reads something basically anti-circ, e.g., sears, saying something like "uncirc'd penises are not that hard to clean" he will distort it and say "look, even this biased author thinks that it requires more work!" so basically before we conceived we worked this out as something i cared about and he was indifferent on. as it becomes more real he is expressing his difference of opinion more but it is not outright opposition -- it is a case of the person with the stronger feeligns on the subject wins. something we try to do a lot of in our relationship. the circ issue (unlike the CD question, on which we also disagree) is particularly hard because there is no real compromise, as i see it.
post #83 of 552
Quote:
Originally Posted by cmu204 View Post
(unsurprisingly, my baby's head is larger than average - you should see my DH )
oh dear
post #84 of 552
Emily - I am fortunate enough to have an intact DH. Of course, no one in my family really knows that and they all think we are crazy for not circ'ing (due to hygienic reasons, of course). I have already thanked my MIL for making the decision easy on us! She said she and my FIL just couldn't see a reason to put such a young child through cosmetic surgery. DH never felt strange or got teased in the locker room - we think that the boys wouldn't say anything even if they did notice a difference because it meant they were looking...

We have discovered that everyone else we know is circ'ing, but we found a ped who is actually against circ'ing, so we'll probably go with him. The Nurse practitioner in his practice is his wife, and she shares most of the same views, so even if we see her for visits, it won't be bad.

A friend of mine who was due August 7 was induced on Wednesday night. I haven't heard from her since, but I'm assuming she had the baby. I had a total freakout when she called to say she was heading to the hospital. This women is one of the healthiest people I know - eats well all the time, gets regular exercise (yoga twice a week, swimming 3x a week and walking every day), and her blood pressure shot up in a 24 hour period of time (to over 160/90) so they had to induce her. I'm assuming everything went well, and they are resting and bonding. I'll find out on Monday ( our DH's work together, so one way or another we'll find out).

I have 9 weeks left until my due date. I can't believe it's coming so fast. We just ordered the bedroom furniture for the baby. We are waiting for my shower (labor day weekend) to see what we get before buying everything else, but there are a few things I wish I had on hand.

Have a great weekend everyone!
post #85 of 552
Happy Saturday morning, gestating lovelies

Welcome, Mandy and eri_flores!

Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorGroover View Post
You sound a lot like me right now - everything is kind of on hold, like an artificial calm but you can feel all the changes coming.
Oh, Dee, this made me smile. I have felt this way consistently since about six months before finishing my degree. That's just about two years now! You've got a good plan in focusing on the baby... much more pleasant than thinking about fellowships, scholarships, job applications, etc.

Emily, boo for the circ argument with DH (my DH and I haven't talked about it yet, but it's definitely on the agenda now!), but yay for the GBS result!

Ultrasounds: thanks so much for all the feedback. It's really great to have so many different thoughts, even though I know it's a completely personal choice. For me, I don't think an ultrasound is going to make me feel more connected to be baby, and nor do I think I have any big fears/worries that are going to be assuaged by seeing the images. Pending OB/midwife approval, my plan right now is to opt out.

Christina, thanks for the article -- it was really exactly what I was looking for.

Teeny, your "I'm pregnant!" story is absolutely wild! What a fantastic surprise!

Wedding: we opted for the self-planned, self-paid backyard wedding. It was simple, and beautiful, and a lot of fun. I must confess, though, that we didn't get a real honeymoon (conference at Princeton the week after the wedding -- Princeton is lovely, but this was hardly a honeymoon), so I'm jealous of those of you that did destination weddings. Combining the wedding and honeymoon is genius!

Ikea: the place I word is in a research park that's not far from the big box stores. Shameful confession: I eat lunch at the Ikea restaurant on a semi-regular basis

Have a great day everyone! I'm going to go shopping for maternity clothes today -- my first ones!
post #86 of 552
Thread Starter 
Changes made to here

: Christina!

eri_flores!
post #87 of 552
Happy Birthday Christina...is it today? Whee! Doing anything fun?

Hi Cornpicker, good to see you! So you're next, eh? Cool! Can't wait!

CJ I think you guys win the prize with the viking hat, that was tooooo funny! I love all our wedding stories!

eri_flores! Beautiful wedding to you too, and I love that you got such a nice cake cuz the caterer felt bad!

Elizabeth...I'm so glad MIL is out of your house. Try to let yourself off the hook. Family is so tough and you have to focus on YOU now and that baby feels your stress. I think you did what you needed to do, so no guilt, please.

Laura...I laughed at what you said about the college degrees and not being scholastically inclined... I do have two college degrees but in music performance. I have absolutely NO patience for reading textbooks and really don't know how I got through the other college courses except to say they were entry-level and not that hard! Performance and music was my thing and thank god I was good at that, cuz, um, NO to the studying and reading stuff. It's so nice you can stay home with baby! My grandfather was a methodist minister, and the church always provided them with a nice home. I remember the big white brick farmhouse they lived in, in Indiana when I was a kid. We ran all over that thing, it was HUGE! The church took very good care of them.

Cher...congrats on the u/s. I felt much better after mine, really. Even though I couldn't see very well, and they didn't take pictures cuz I "didn't ask for them". : My bean measured 5 to 7 days ahead, as well, but DH is HUGE and this is a boy, so that makes sense. Also, I think I O'd early that month, so he's right where I thought he was.

Finally, Emily... for your circ argument. This is a tough one. I am having a boy so this did come up...I said, "Honey, I don't want to circ" and he said, "Ok." So honestly I don't know what I'd do if I had to have that fight, but I know I'd fight it. Funny thing, I don't think most people think about it. They just do what their folks did, and if I had not found MDC (thank god I did) I'd be giving birth in a hospital, having routine vax, using sposies and formula, and probably... gasp... circing. Thank you to MDC for educating me about these issues... whatever we choose to do, at least now it's a choice and not just a repeat of what my folks did. Good luck. And YAY for GBS negative!

I. am. so. sick. of. Phantom. of. the. Opera. !!!! I think baby is too, he's kicking stronger now when I play or is that normal for 24 weeks? 12 shows left, then I get a vacation! Whee! I can do it! Honestly I'm glad I'm doing it though because normally we don't work in the summer and I'd be SOOO bored without being able to take my Bikram yoga and my dance classes (6 months pregnant + salsa dancing = not impossible, but a little weird), plus the money's nice.

Have a great weekend and think of me slaving away in the orchestra pit all day!
post #88 of 552
Wow how exciting
post #89 of 552
Cher congrats on the u/s! Isn't it fun to see the little one moving around in there?

Jenn and PiePie, I thought all peds were against circ'ing since it's no longer recommended by the AAP?

Jenn that's scary that a super-healthy woman would have to be induced b/c of blood pressure. I *really* don't want to be induced! I heard some famous doctor (obstetric anesthesiologist at Harvard) say that pitocin and epidurals go together. Yuck.

Xenon good to know I'm not the only one who feels like she's in the calm before the storm. Sorry you missed out on the honeymoon - I recommend Couples in Jamaica.. one day, after the baby's older right? Have fun shopping for mat clothes. I LMAO the first time I tried on the fake bump.

: Christina! Have an awesome day!

Julia sorry you're sick of POTO! Only 12 shows left!

Happy 3rd trimester to me! I can't believe it, but then I can, but then I can't. : Wow.
post #90 of 552
Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorGroover View Post
Jenn and PiePie, I thought all peds were against circ'ing since it's no longer recommended by the AAP?
well, the aap doesn't recommend for, but it doesn't recommend against either. and i have found that peds are not necessarily in line with the policy statements -- for example, the pro-bfing position is pretty clear (exclusive for the first 6 mos) but none we have met comes on that strong -- afraid of seeming judgmental. also, there is a revision of the aap statement in the works (to come out in 2008) changing their position to recommended because of the hiv thing.
post #91 of 552
Hi Ladies!

Happy birthday, Christina!!

I've been SO BUSY these last few weeks. Ugh. But I've caught up on the whole thread! I wanted to share some wedding pix too!

Add us to the list of couples who eloped. We got married on the island of St. John in the USVI. It was amazing and lovely and next week is our 2-year anniversary!

Our ceremony was back in this little private cove (my legs got completely bitten up back there!! But it was great!):

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/199/4...e1275c2e_o.jpg

Here's the boy and I, cracking up at something. This is my favorite picture!

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/227/4...5b998f42_o.jpg

Oh man, seeing our beach totally makes me want to go back!!

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/216/4...53cf61d9_o.jpg

Anyhoo, here's my life in a nutshell:

- We're moving August 17, approximately 2 weeks before my due date. Yes, we're insane.
- For the last few weeks we've been working hard to get our new condo ready to move in. That has included clearing the unit out of the previous owner's crap (it was a short sale, pre-foreclosure, so paying to have her crap removed was the only way we could close), hiring a cleaning crew, hiring painters who started this past week, getting air ducts cleaned, and setting up to have the carpets cleaned.
- All is well with me and baby! I had my GBS swab this past week, haven't gotten the results yet. I didn't expect to have an internal and the midwife just kind of went for it without asking! She's my favorite midwife in the practice, so I'll forgive her, but I will likely be refusing internals unless I go late. My cervix is closed but thinning. Baby is head down, on the left, and anterior. Woohoo! She's also been moving much more lately. I think that's what I'll miss most about being pregnant; feeling her move.

So, August mamas to be, what are you guys packing in your bag if you're delivering in a hospital? I want to get my bag packed by next weekend!

Are you August ladies totally freaked out? I am! (and I could end up being an August mama, my due date is Sept 2!).
post #92 of 552
becky, it sounds like your cervix is more ready than mine! of course it has been more than 3 weeks since my last vaginal exam, so who knows for sure.

i am hormonal, grouchy, and way too hot today. trying to nest. stressed about the state of the apt. dh is being great.
post #93 of 552
Cher - Yay for seeing that little heartbeat. That was favorite part of the u/s too. I was so amazed at how baby-like he looked in there (until I saw the front face...THAT was a tiny bit creepy, but everything in profile was awesome ). Since you aren't telling us, I am going to guess girl for you!

Becky Yes, you are completely insane but congrats on the move anyway. Listen up Becky's little daughter, you best stay inside and cook until after Aug 17. Your mama wan't to have your new place already for you BEFORE you arrive (plus, you will never pack as well as you are right now, so STAY INSIDE!!!). BTW Becky, love your wedding pics. You two look like you had so much fun!

Christina - HAPPY BIRTHDAY preggo!!!! Hee hee. It still gives me great joy that you are over on this thread with us now

Pie Sorry you feel hormonal and grouchy. I am doing a little bit better today that I was earlier in the week. I don't want to kill DH right now. I do sort of wish my feet would either decrease in size and swelling or just get it over with and explode. This in between state is awful (my flip flops left marks on my feet for the first time today - ugly and pitiful).

So, DH and I did our final run to BRU & Target today (ha ha, like it's really going to be our final run - but it's our last anticipated run) and bought our supplies. The My Breast Friend pillow is HUGE! I was shocked. Packing for the hospital is going to be a big deal. My goal is to have all of my hospital stuff ready to go by next Sunday.

I also had a great time learning how to use my wrap at a babywearing meeting. Woohoo. Sooooo ready to put the baby in the BBS and the hotsling (and now I really want a ring sling). Do any of you have baby carriers yet?! I so think I have the beginnings of a major addiction.
post #94 of 552
Becky your wedding looked so nice! Casual and relaxed! You look so happy! Pretty there, too. Wow.

Emily...I have a maya sling my friend passed along that she could never be bothered with and a pouch from kanga corner or something like that which was her gift to me. I teared up when I saw the pouch, it was the first moment I think the pregnancy felt real to me. That said, I'm uncertain of my abilities to do too much babywearing because I already have back problems and neck/shoulder issues from playing the violin. I'll have to see... otherwise I plan on using it as much as I can, probably more when we're NOT playing though. I think baby will spend a lot of time on his daddy's back though.

10 shows and counting.
post #95 of 552

New here

Hi all, can I join? I just got my first-ever BFP this morning! Well, if you want to get into the particulars, there were lines on three of the FOUR tests I peed on (CBE, $Tree, AimStick), and then I ran out and got a digi, which came up BFP in less than a minute! :

For specifics on the front page, I am 32 and my EDD is April 13, 2008. I turn 33 on April 4, and DH turns 33 on April 26, so that's a pretty significant EDD. My mom is April 12, and two good friends are April 13! LOL

I enjoyed reading this thread from the first page, getting the details of everyone's weddings. DH and I got married 2 years ago at an outdoor ceremony in a courtyard behind a historic Victorian mansion in Sacramento. We have big families, so had to invite about 150 people, but they are far-flung, so only 46 attended, which was a nice size. When I figure out how to imbed photos I'll update with one...

PiePie - I also am an attorney. I did three years at a litigator (dependency law : ) and now am much less stressed working in-house for the State Dept. of Fish and Game. I can sympathize with what you're dealing with, and hope these last days of work go by quickly. BTW, I voted for Lorelei as I do think it's a beautiful name, and I'm also a huge GG fan so would probably consider the name because of the show rather than despite it.

Julia - I grew up near and later lived in the Shenandoah Valley! What a beautiful place for a wedding! I lived in Southside Richmond, then Churchville (near Harrisonburg) and later Waynesboro (between Staunton and Charlottesville). I'm really impressed that you play for POTO as I was raised by a father who majored in band-directing and now plays for the Richmond Pops. I think I disappointed him by never showing talent despite lessons on piano, ukelele, clarinet... DH and I just got back from a whirlwind trip to NYC during which we attended RENT and Wicked performances, Yankees and Mets games, and visited four museums. When I heard Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal were reprising their roles in RENT, I just couldn't stay away

Dee - It's good to see you here. Thanks so much for your *donations* to my TTC cause, the tests were super-helpful! Now I will have some extras to pay the generosity forward!

The circ issue is a strange sort of *sleeper* issue. It's weird. I knew nothing about it until I started TTC, then a good friend brought up the issue and I started asking questions. I still can't understand why I had to search out the info - why the info hasn't pervaded our media and societal knowledge. What I found out made me really angry - the widespread hush-hush especially. When I forwarded a bunch of the articles to DH, he was appalled. I will search out the Penn and Teller show on Netflix - it sounds interesting.
post #96 of 552
Lacy... and congratulations! How exciting! Lots of April babies in your family, eh? Our wedding was in Staunton at the White Fence B&B. My normal gig isn't POTO, it's with the opera at the kennedy center and then we play for shows and visiting ballet companies in our off-season. We have to rotate to the top of a long, slow-moving list for shows, so the extra money is unexpected but well-timed as I'll have to let go of some income in December for maternity leave. When you're only officially employed 26 weeks out of the year it's tough to convince management you need paid maternity leave... So nice to see you here!
post #97 of 552
Oh wow, there's a lot to comment on but I'll do my best. First off, welcome and congratulations Lacy! And Teenytoona! And eri_flores! I'm really excited to have new people join. It reminds me how amazing being pregnant is. And how awesome it was to get that BFP.

Happy birthday Christina! Congrats on seeing the heartbeat, Cher!

I love an active thread. Let's see. I wish we had an Ikea nearby, but we don't. My brother can be persuaded to bring a crib from Ikea when he visits soon. (We'll cosleep... but kind of want a crib for in case and eventual naps.) But what about other stuff we might need? A dresser to use as a changing table? Or a cheap rocker? And should getting a bigger bed be an immediate priority? Right now what I want are cushy, cushy chairs. My husband built most of our living room furniture ( http://www.digitalmediatree.com/schwarz/comment/30262/ -- the chairs, not the desk, and incidentally I don't know why I can't bury my URLs in words like you all do. I can't use smilies either. Must be some setting.) which is cool. But low, wooden chairs are not so comfy whilst pregnant. Our couch is similarly spartan. Cushy furniture would have to go entirely on the credit card, though. What to do?

But we do have carriers! I have a used hug-a-bub (like a Moby wrap) and a Rockin' Baby Pouch. Same brother bought us a nice ring sling which should arrive soon. I'm excited to try them all with a real baby!

Love the wedding pictures and stories, everyone. It's really neat to see faces for some of you I haven't yet.

Emily, circ is tricky. I feel like that's something I COULD NOT compromise on, but when I brought it up DH agreed that we didn't have to circ if it was a boy. If he'd been adamantly on the other side, I don't know what I would have done. He's quite stubborn. I feel like I've mentioned this before, but I've never seen an (adult) uncirced penis either? However, I found out just weeks ago that my father and brothers are all uncirced. I've lived in that family for 31 years and never realized this.

Becky, hooray for good position! And wow... moving two weeks before. That's intense. I would do it, too, but make sure you have LOTS of support. Our move (8 weeks before) was hard. Not the move itself, so much as the aftermath. I think you own the condo you're moving into, right? So that'll help, probably. But there's the unsettled feeling, and the being overwhelmed by having to figure out how stuff works in the new space. It's been hard for me; I was pretty down the last couple days. Of course I'm still working too, and haven't felt like I'm doing as good a job lately, so bringing all of that together with my tiredness and sense of how much work still looms even AFTER we get the furniture moved (or, in some cases, bought!) has been kind of killer.

I guess I thought the last few weeks of my pregnancy would be me all journalling and taking self-portraits and serenely cooking freezer meals and sorting baby clothes in a perfectly aesthetic nursery, and oh yeah, swimming each day and writing my dissertation. Now it's feeling hectic and rushed. Our phone doesn't yet work (their fault not ours) so my midwife can't call me to arrange the appointment we're supposed to have next week. I'm feeling better about it all, though. The cameraderie of this thread helps a lot.
post #98 of 552
Thanks for the warm welcome all! And welcome to Anouk! How exciting is that first BFP!?!?

dctexan: hubby and I just made our "last" run to BRU last week. We had a gift certificate to use and got some odds n ends: a changing pad (also just setting it on a low dresser), a few bottles and bags for breast milk storage, baby nail clippers. I got a boppy from somone on craigs list and was also suprised by how huge it is! I've been using it to prop up the belly: so useful for lounging!

Also in the beginning stages of a *major* baby carrier obsession. So far have only bought two pouch slings: one in a neutral color so hubby can use and one with a girly print (both used, both from MDC). My brother says he's getting us an Ergo as a gift so that's three. We'll go from there, as I really would like to try just about everything out!

PiePie: re: the aap changing bfing recs based on hiv infection... I just read a study that said that actually babies of hiv+ moms who were exclusively breastfed had a *lower* chance of getting the virus...something to do with the proteins in formula when supplementing causing small injuries to the stomach and intestines that allowed the virus more of a chance to infect, rather than just passing through. So it's not as clear-cut as it seemed. Though I don't know if this will have any effect on their plan to change the recommendation. Bah.

On the circ issue, I'm with the pp who said it's funny how "underground" an issue it is! It just never really came up for me, maybe a function of my family's practices and beliefs (non-circing) but I assumed that beyond the religious practice, most people just didn't really do it. So much emotion being attached to it sometimes suprises me. I'm lucky that hubby is intact and I'm not even sure we actually asked the question out loud to one another, just assumed we would not circ a boy child. (Maybe I should ask him, just to be sure!)

Guess overall, I'm feeling ready. I have a cute little diaper changing station set up now, finally got all the clothes washed and put away. We still need some more prefolds but we might plan to do gdiapers for a little bit in the beginning til we can be sure that prefolds are the way we want to go. What else? Got boobs, carriers on the way, homebirth kit, even have a few meals frozen ahead. Sounds pretty good, right?

Anyone doing/planning to do perineal massage? My childbirth educator gave us a pamphlet about it, saying start at about 34 weeks and my mw has been suggesting it. I kinda tried, but can't reach myself (dang large belly!!) and hubby and I have opposite schedules now. I'm at 39 weeks tomorrow and I guess any massage is good massage right? Does it seem worth it? Anyone with anecdotes from friends who have done it?

Cooler temp today! I feel ever so slightly more human.
post #99 of 552
I've heard mixed things about perineal massage; some of what I've read (and what OUR childbirth class people said) suggests that it doesn't necessarily help prevent tears. Do it if you want, it doesn't HURT, but it isn't necessary, is sort of the message I've imbibed. I do try to remember to do kegels, though.

Wow I can't believe how close the next babies in this thread are!

My poor husband. He's done SO much work moving stuff around, but yet I'm so grouchy lately. And today I'm not grouchy, but I have strong opinions about arranging stuff (diaper stuff, for example), and he feels like they're "impractical" (I've done extensive childcare; he's never babysat, so yeah, they are practical demands) for the space. I think he's just too attached to his own version of order and isn't thinking about the actual needs of having a child. (Like, the diapers have to be within reach of the diaper changing place.) So he's working super hard, but putting up with me and dealing with frustration at the same time. I tell him his idea about how to arrange things isn't going to work; he sits and sulks for a bit... then he gets up and does more hard work. I tell myself it's okay; he's going to need these skills and the ability to sometimes not get his way when our kid is here. Overall, I have to say he's been amazing lately, even given that we've had a fair number of arguments about where to put stuff.

And can I just tell you guys that I'm wearing my jeans that the butt ripped completely across, and a white tank top that, like all my tank tops, is stained with both colustrum AND coffee? Awesome.
post #100 of 552
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~minnow~ View Post
And should getting a bigger bed be an immediate priority?
for us it became the furniture priority. dh had wanted one all along, i resisted. but then i read good nights, by j. gordon, re safe colseeping. and now we've got a king-size mattress (on the floor).
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