feeling so down about breastfeeding

[kathteach]

I hope no one minds listening to me whine. I just want to breastfeed.this time around, but feel really negative about my chances. Today I looked at my chest. My nipples are so huge. I mean like Coke can-size in diameter. How is a newborn going to get all that in there? And then I have flat nipples too. And huge-ola pendulous breasts. I am already set up with a great LC, I plan on getting a lactaid and pump...but I feel like such a failure before I've even started. I have more anxiety about this issue than going through birth again. I know I can pump exclusively again if I need to, but that is just a huge pain in the butt. I worry about this a lot. I guess I need to let it go and take what comes when I get there. There are worse things in life to worry about. I'm a very lucky and blessed person. That's all.

[Mama2 '05'06]

[Isaac'sMa]

Aw, mama, it is stressful to worry about something like that but it sounds like you are doing all the right things ahead of time. My best friend has breasts just like you described yours and she BFed her son though it was really hard for a few weeks in the beginning. Has your LC recommended a breast shield? I think I'm thinking of the right thing...you wear it inside your bra before the baby comes and it's supposed to "draw out" your nipples to make it easier for baby to latch. (if it's called something else, someone please chime in!) Try to stay positive and get lots of support!

[sorteep]

OH dear, I am so sorry for your worry... it sounds as if you have everything in place for a succesful experience.. I bet the lac consultant will have some good ideas.. I have heard the breast shields work wonders for inverted/ flat nipples.. I have the opposite prob and my nipples are so hugely NOT inverted (like really actaully structually abnormal.. sorry TMI) that my kids latch on, suck, gag, vomit repeat rereat repeat.. it si HORRIBLE.. esp if I would manage to get milk in my second would gag and barf it ALL up right at the end of the feed.... I guess eitehr extreme is hard.. too bad I can't share some of mine with you and solve both our probs.. I did manage to persevere and my kids got used to them hopefully your tike will too, many hugs

[Monkeybutt]

[melissakc]

My friend has flat nipples too and she has used a nipple shield for over a year. It was really hard for her at first but now she says it's no big deal. It's just part of her BF experience. Her DS is 15 months old now and still nursing like a champ!

I hope it will work out for you! I know that stress can make it more difficult to BF, so I hope you'll find some relief soon. I had a hard time pumping when I was stressed and had to teach myself to relax and think positive thoughts. GL!

[GinaRae]

I've always been told I am "Too big to breastfeed" and that was beginning way back with my first when my breasts were way smaller. But somehow with the last boy I finally got past the first couple of weeks.

I remember your post elsewhere (hopefully I am not mistaken) that said you're 6'2 and not that overweight (because a lot of us are HUGE compared to you! except the height, that is), but what size are your breasts?

Also, this may be demeaning if you already know this, so don't slap me. Is it the nipple that's the size of a coke can, or the areola around the nipple? The protruding nipple usually isn't nearly that big but my areola is HUGE and I do not expect baby to get all that in his mouth.

I am afraid mine colapse a bit in on themselves (inverted??). And I always have HORRIBLE PAIN when I breastfeed. But I made it to 5.5 months while working last time and this time I WILL succeed for at least 12 months. I am committed, and I think that makes the difference.

Do you stay at home or will you have to sometimes pump?

[kathteach]

Aww, thanks for all the support guys. You don't know how much I appreciate it.
Isaac'sMa, I heard of the breast shells too but my doctor and an LC I saw say it's not a good idea for me to use them b/c I'm at risk for preterm labor. I'm currently on light bedrest. I have never heard of the opposite problem like you have. We women go through so much for our kids. I never realized to what extent before having a baby.
GinaRae, yeah, it's the areola, I should have been more clear...and the nipples are flat. And the boobs are like size E I think. I've just been squishing into the bras I had before I got pregnant with my son. : I have a book called the Mother's Nursing Companion that says women with large areolas are at danger for low milk supply b/c the baby can't fit the areola all in to fully compress the milk sinuses. That book recommends pumping to keep up supply. Maybe I read too much and create problems before they're even there.
I know everything will be okay no matter what. I am not someone who thinks formula is poison or evil, but I do want what's best and normal for the baby, plus my mom and nephew have Type 1 diabetes and I know bf'ing reduces the risk of getting that. I do know that I saw my son really thrive on breastmilk and I'm proud I gave it to him for almost 11 months, and this new baby deserves the same.
I think any problems I encountered probably COULD be worked out with persistence and a good attitude, I'm just scared that postpartum I'm going to be all crazy and weepy like before and just not have the strength to go through whatever I need to get through it.
All I can say is, please keep the support coming. It is helping me be strong and motivated. Last time with all my problems my family pressured me to use formula and really everyone thought I was crazy doing the pumping thing. It means the world to me that here you all can understand why I want to so bad, and will encourage me to get there. So once again thank you.

[Isaac'sMa]

: To what Gina said about the baby not getting the entire areola into his/her mouth. I know plenty of mamas who have large areolas and the baby gets a good bit into their mouth but not all. Mine are not as large as yours (from your description) but my son didn't always get it all in his mouth, just enough for a good latch. HTH.

[Momtwice]

Not in your due date club but I saw your post on new threads.

I've dealt with nipple issues and previous breastfeeding failure and come out the other side successfully....wishing you lots of good luck and

PLEASE, come on over to the breastfeeding forums for more support!

[Grace24]

Uh-oh, I just realized my aeriola (sp?) is also the size of a Coke can. :

don't worry! There are women all shapes and sizes who breast feed...whatever the issue I'm sure the lactation consultant has seen it and can help.

[Kontessa]

Did you borrow my boobs?

I understand your worry and feel a lot of the same things. I am trying really hard though to trust my body and nature and my ability to get help this time rather then stress about it.

Meditation. Visualisation. Faith. And lots of support!

It has to be ok!

[Beckula]

I had boobs just like yours only bigger (42 I's) and i nursed my DS for 17 months. It wasn't always easy but I made the commitment and I had good support and I think you will do fine. To be honest the only thing that really screwed me up at first was the dumb idea that my DS should only eat every 3 hours and that is what screwed up my milk supply, not the size of my areolas. Throw the eating schedule out of the window, find someone who can help you recognize a good latch and you will be set.

[Michaels-Mommy]

HUGS! My areolas are very big too, funny I never looked before but i just did. I only had a problem with my sons latch in the begining, about 2 to 3 weeks. I had to hold him in the football hold and the LC was very helpful in helping me hold the baby so he could open his mouth wider. Good luck momma!

[Undercover Hippie]

Another huge-areoled mama here too. Heck, if I put a coke can over them, I'm pretty sure there would still be 1/2" of areola showing all around the edges! And my boobs get to about a G/H when I'm nursing. It seems like it must be intimidating for a new baby to face all that! But we perservered and my kids have nursed for 22 and 36 mos. respectively. So it can work out for you too!

After my last birth the LLL leader who was helping me was like, you know that baby doesn't have to fit all that areola in her mouth, right? Luckily she was a big breasted gal herself, which was why I called her... I knew she would understand and have the tips I needed. Definitely find a great support person like that, who has maybe even dealt with the same issues!

Anyway, I think if you can get help with the flat/inverted nipples than none of the other things have to be a problem at all. Big breasts can be harder to keep in the correct position for baby to latch onto and that can be a challenge but a good LC or LLL leader can teach you lots of tricks. As far as supply goes, I think if you get a good latch and baby nurses on demand, any size breast can make a good supply (with rare exceptions). I have never heard that large areolas can lead to low supply--I personally tend towards an oversupply...

Good luck mama, hang in there and you can do it!

[GinaRae]

I was also an over-supplier and dealt with engorgement issues all the time. I don't know scientifically, but that sinus thing doesn't make as much sense as getting baby latched on and getting the rush of hormones. That's MUCH better than pumping in my case!

The hormones keep me making more and more milk. When I tried exclusively pumping I would notice less and less milk each day so I would need a good boost of hormones from holding him and having him latch on and it would kick me right back into more milk.

Plus there are herbal teas and what-not to use for supply. SO while the squished nipples is a big issue, I bet you will be able to overcome. We're in this together and I will see you on the milking board at some point. I will need all the support I can get from there!!

[myjulybabes]

Another huge areola mom here too! IME, you want to get a large proportion of the areola in their mouth in order to get a good latch and get them enough milk, but it really doesn't have to be the WHOLE thing. Get as much as you can in there without choking them, basically. Seriously, when dd was born, the hospital LC walked in on us mid-feeding (handy, no?) and tsk-tsk'd "oh no no no, that latch is no good. Way too much of your areola is showing. Unlatch her and I'll show you!". So I did. Her eyes got nearly as big as my areola when she saw how much dd really did have in her mouth. Dd weaned at around 8 mos for reasons having nothing to do with supply or latch, and ds nursed for 18 mos. It can be done!

Now my nipples are not flat or inverted, but a trick I've heard of is: pump for just a minute before the feeding to "draw out" the nipple. Not sure how well that works because I've never tried it, but I do see it suggested a lot in nursing books.

[lisalulu]

I don't have the exact same issues but my nipples are almost flat and I had awful breastfeeding problems with ds. We never had a good latch at the hospital and I went home with a pump and was feeding ds with a syringe for the first couple days. Then we went to the nipple shield which honestly sucked big time. Having to mess around with it in the middle of the night was a pain but it probably saved me from totally giving up. We weaned off the shield around 2 or 3 months. Things did get better. Oh and already being hooked up with a LC is a great plan-I saw one about week after ds was born and it really helped me. They have all sorts of tips and tricks to help you.

[Mama Bear]

My areolas are quite large too. With a tiny newborn, a breast will seem huge in comparision regardless of the true size - so don't worry when he/she first latches on. Babies are born to breastfeed - they will figure it out.
I would highly, highly reccomend getting in touch with a local La Leche League group in your area www.lllusa.org
I went to several meetings before having ds1 and it was such a help to see babies nursing in person (I had never before) and to establish a relationship with my local leader. After my son was born, I called her all the time and she was a great resource as I had a lot of issues! I nursed my son until he weaned himself a few months after turning 2.
I also reccomend reading 'The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding'. And check out the breastfeeding forums here too. There's tons of help/info out there - fill your head with it now!!!
You can do it mama!!!

[GooeyRN]

I am there with you. I EP'd for my dd for 18 months b/c she couldn't latch. My areola's are about as big as yours, and my nipples are completely flat. (but I have A cup boobs, so you can imagine how funny looking they are! The areola takes up the whole breast almost) I can not get them to come out. Not even with ice cubes or pumping! DD just couldn't latch onto the nothingness. I had a wonderful supply with EPing, even though not nearly all of the areola was being sucked into the flange. I am hoping for a better time of bfing this time around, too.