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Moms of Many August support thread - Page 7

post #121 of 147
Thread Starter 
You call them CSA boxes, I think. Pay ten (or in our case, twenty) pounds per week and a lovely chap turns up on your doorstep clutching boxes of fresh farm-grown and mostly local organic vegetables. The next week they take away your empties and bring you more vegetables It makes life a lot easier, even if I do spend four months a year cooking celeriac and red cabbage for every meal
post #122 of 147
Does anyone else here buy through a food co op? My 15yr old is eating me out of house and home so Ive started to buy in bulk. Ive also been finding some great deals on amazon.com for their organic foods.
post #123 of 147
Originally Posted by flapjack View Post
It makes life a lot easier, even if I do spend four months a year cooking celeriac and red cabbage for every meal
What no chard? We have had to develop a love of that stuff this year as well as ordinary cabbage but we can't get enough of celeriac grated with carrot then mashed with mayo - yum.

We had a box from Coleshill near you for about a year now along with about 20 other people in Abingdon and when the 'root' monotony was getting me down I borrowed the New Covent Garden Soup for All Seasons book from the library and we have a good lot of new favourites from it.

Some other mums at school get the box too so we swap solutions for emptying the box of the wierd stuff every week! This month we've mostly been having trouble eating enough potatoes. I've got 4 paper bags of them in the bottom of the fridge
post #124 of 147
Mom to four girls here!
post #125 of 147
Welcome EStraiton!

post #126 of 147
Thread Starter 
Hey, that's weird, our box comes from Coleshill too I'm planning on switching to Riverford or Abel and Cole though, I just can't handle lagging pounds of vegetables around the countryside without a car. You're right, how could I forget the chard? : It's nearly that time of year again, isn't it?

What on earth made me think another baby was a good idea? I've just spent the last 4 hours fumigating, tidying and disinfecting the boys room- and seriously, that room is BAD All I need to do is put the mattress covers back on and make the beds, but I just can't get the smells out Someone's had a few asthma attacks and a few wet beds recently, and he seems to have completely bypassed the bed protector Ick. Any bright ideas?
post #127 of 147
It's been baking hot here today and I've washed and aired a load of stuff that had been sicked on last week. Can you leave the matresses out all day tomorrow and maybe the next day? Direct sunlight will help a bit then you could sprinkle with bicarb when you bring them back in then hoover off and repeat as necessary.....

I helped the boys clear out their fetid pit again at the beginning of last week and I'm glad we did other wise there would have been sick on a lot more stuff.

In fact the clearing out thing is a question I wanted to ask here

Is having a lot of stuff (as in the kind that can easily be put in to a black sack and got rid of without anyone shedding a tear over) absolutely essential to a large-ish family?

I have sent countless bags of clothes to the charity shop over the last year and I still feel like we are drowning under the clothes, books and papers of 6 people.

Do I just keep on clearing out so that our basic stuff level is low and we can cop with the daily addition of stuff or am I doing something very badly wrong here?

Something which I feel hinders us is that we live in a 2 bedroom house and we really lack storage space but I may be making excuses.
post #128 of 147
Oh and here's a soup recipe to get rid of your greens

2oz butter
1 medium potato diced small
1/2 a leek
1 onion

Sweat all this together for 10 minutes

Add a pint of veg stock and a good handful of red (split) lentils simmer for 15 mins.

7oz greens (thats about the whole bag of chard) wash and cut out stems then chop.

Add greens to pan and simmer for 3 mins

Whizz it til chunky and flecked with green then add

9fl oz milk

It is quite filling especially with a pan cooked soda bread
post #129 of 147
Thread Starter 
Ooh, yum.

I think the answer to the "lot of stuff" question is yes. Families have children, children attract clutter the way that strawberry plants attract ants.
The mattresses are from IKEA, so have removable covers. In the end, what I did was put the covers through the wash, the bases out in the garden with a huge quantity of bicarb over the foam layer and the springs and then put the whole thing back together in the evening. I also threw out three binbags full of disassembled and broken toys , one recycling box full of paper and cardboard, and there are three binbags full of toys in the loft, awaiting decisions. (If nobody has asked for them by October 2nd, they're going to the Nearly New Sale.) And you know what really stinks? It's one year and one week since we moved, and I really purged everything when we did

My neighbours are gossiping though- I put the rubbish straight out by the back gate so I wouldn't get small boys going through the bags trying to reclaim something, and I've had three people trying to find out what's going on and why we have so much rubbish this week (I'm the local recycling queen, we normally put one half-empty bag out a week.)

The best thing? Isaac slept through the night last night with no wheeziness : It looks like there was something in the mattress that was setting him off.
post #130 of 147
We had a similar tally of rubbish to recycling for their room too! Fortunately we have 2 green boxes and a big brown bin for cardboard and garden waste so not much went into a bin bag.

The mess thing is madness when, as you say, it has only been a year since you thought you were all purged and minimalist: I can empty the boys small room of bags of stuff every couple of months and they don't even play with toys as such anymore. I usually start thinking about it when you can't close their door and I don't seem to have washed many socks or pants in the last week:

A wheeze-free night is a realy tangible result and long may it last!
post #131 of 147

UGh, LONG, in-law rant

I am in such a funky, bad mood. I don't THINK I get crazy moody when I'm pregnant, but maybe I do and don't realize it, or maybe this pregnancy is different... ? But I do know that my source of my bad mood is the fact that my FIL was here visiting and I thought the visit went nicely but I guess I'm niave because my MIL called my hubby yesterday "angry" but he "calmed her down" by the end of the conversation. I just don't even want to rehash it, it makes me so mad.

Weirdly, both my MIL AND my mother are nurses, in their 50s, have been divorced 3 times each and live about 20 minutes from each other. And have issues. My hubby and I moved our family from South Florida to Michigan for numerous reasons, but I can say that not having to deal with these two on a regular basis is a huge bonus.

Apparently, my mother said to her that my hubby had to get himself fixed and my MIL said I needed to get my tubes tied, so my MIL was angry over their conversation.

First of all, in my dad's family, the people who marry into the family aren't treated as second class citizens, but members of the family. It pisses me off that the two of them were each acting like, oh, MY precious child shouldn't have to be the one snipped; MY child is better than YOURS. Secondly, of course, moreso than that, is just the whole, WTH : of their conversation in the first place. When my hubby said neither of us were going to do such a thing, she's like "well how are you going to prevent the next one??" Also, apparently they both started getting each other worked up about the upcoming homebirth, so my MIL had to make sure she bitched about that one more time to hubby too.

I wish the two of them (the grandmas) had never met sometimes.

And I hate all the money issues. They make SO much money and have nothing to show for it because they blow through it like it's melting (both my mom and MIL).

And, to me, the money stuff on my hubby's side is this weirdly manuevered minefield of psychological issues - his dad was bragging the whole time about how much money they have and how he is coming into money and money, money, money, and how my hubby's mom writes checks for everyone she knows right and left constantly and how we need to do this and do that and take this vacation and don't worry, they'll pay for everything, and when we talk about how we can't live like that, or we have a budget or we shop at Goodwill, it's like, I don't know, they think we are deprived or something? Like we have too many children already and we suck because we aren't giving the kids we do have a fabulous privileged lifestyle. My in-laws were millionares when their kids were little, they only had two kids and a nanny and went away on trips to Europe without them... they lost all their money since then so they've had to work their way back up I guess, but they still make way more than we do and they just don't. get. things.

Like, hubby's dad was telling me he wanted us to fly to Florida in the fall to go to Walt Disney World for a vacation. Don't worry, he'd pay for everything! OH, can I say SQUEEEEEEE!!!! REally???? Let's just dump all that money into something like that, can we really? With a two-year-old and an infant in tow??? Like, literally, I am giving birth at the beginning of October. When exactly are we supposed to do this? He said January would be too late. And all next year would be too busy for him, but he was trying desperately to convince me it would be good fun for everyone to drag our asses and our three-week-old around Walt Disney World. With the amount of money that would cost for the plane trips and hotels and food and admission, shoot, just give it to us and we'll pay off our car for pete's sake. I wasn't so unclassy as to say that, I just got tired of trying to make him understand why that wouldn't really be fun. That's what I mean by not getting things. I don't think they really raised their kids and they don't understand that you can't just put kids in a box and put them away when you get tired of them, or when they get tired and crabby.

And, of course, my MIL was asking my hubby if he "was happy." And if I bossed him around (which is completely laughable if you knew us IRL, hubby is such an alpha male type and I am so laid back). AND that makes me wonder what exactly my FIL reported when he went back.

I am so lucky, because my hubby could care less what they have to say about anything, none of this bothers him in the least. He has absolutely no need to suck up to them in the least. I'm sure 30 seconds after he told me about the conversation, he wasn't even thinking about it in the least.

I don't know why any of their opinions are getting to me but it all just really bothers me. I don't want to talk to anyone until I give birth because I swear I will just hang up on them if I have to hear one word about homebirth dangers and having too many children.

I guess the problem is that hubby told me about the conversation at all. He probably shouldn't have. I think I'll have to ask him not to share with me in the future because it gets me so worked up. I think he thinks it's funny, and I already know and have known that his mother (and my mother for that matter) are real jackasses so WHY am I even thinking about it?

I swear when did having FOUR children become a LOT? Seriously? I always imagined us having 5 or 6, and that really isn't that many in my mind. WHAT is with people? WHY would ANY grandparent not be excited about more grandkids???? *muttering* Telling us we need to get snipped or tied.... SO. RUDE.

Sorry this was so long. Thanks for listening.

Would anyone like me to post a recipe for pumpkin pie with tofu I just came across yesterday?
post #132 of 147
waiting4it2snow, that sounds awful. I'm sorry.

My life is insane:

5:00-5:45 Katie Grace has ballet
5:30-7:00 Michael has soccer
6:30-7:30 Katie Grace has Brownies

So the plan is:
I always make some sort of all-in-one crockpot meal on Tuesdays. I take Katie Grace to ballet with the baby while Chip slops the boys. Then he takes Michael to soccer and then comes back. I bring Katie Grace home, shovel food in her, and Chip drops her off at Brownies on his way to church for meetings. I take the two baby boys to go pick up Michael, we kick around the playground for ten minutes to kill time, then we go pick up Katie Grace. I will then collapse in a heap.
post #133 of 147
Thread Starter 
Wow, Annettemarie, that's a full day. Here's sending you safe landing vibes for when you collapse

Waiting4it2snow, there are no words. Just
post #134 of 147
Originally Posted by flapjack View Post
Wow, Annettemarie, that's a full day. Here's sending you safe landing vibes for when you collapse
Blessedly, it's a day all squished into two-and-a-half hours. Also, I remembered that Katie Grace only has Brownies every other week, so that will cut down on some of the chaos.
post #135 of 147
Originally Posted by waiting4it2snow View Post
I swear when did having FOUR children become a LOT? Seriously? I always imagined us having 5 or 6, and that really isn't that many in my mind. WHAT is with people? WHY would ANY grandparent not be excited about more grandkids???? *muttering* Telling us we need to get snipped or tied.... SO. RUDE.
I hear you on that one! When I had a m/c after #3 MIL, instead of saying things like "I'm sorry." or "Is Daniele doing okay?" says to DH, "Well, you have your hands full enough as it is. You should get a vasectomy.". This is literally the day I'm in bed with heavy cramping and bleeding.

I've thought a long time about why MIL said that. I think it stems from the fact that both IL's grew up in the country where big families are the norm. They got married young and moved away to the 'big city'. They were the only siblings to do that out of 11 combined. They were also the only ones who had only two children and I think they always felt progressive or more educated than the other siblings (who had anywhere from 3-5 children). So when they see us revert back to what they feel they progressed from, it makes them feel annoyed. Doesn't make me feel better about her comments, but it's kept me from going crazy, lol!

Now we'll just have the going back to work battle when DS3 is school-age. She thinks that I should whereas I plan to stay home. At least I have a few years rest before then though.
post #136 of 147
waiting4it2snow - Its not pregnancy: I would be feeling the same as you and I'm not pregnant (at least I don't thinks so!)

It's our littlest dd's 1st birthday this weekend and the IL's can't come on the day because they will need to come 2 days later anyway to visit someone else and they can't make 2 trips... and then when dh called to find out their plans MIL suggested to dh that he just bring the girls over to where they are staying.

One the one hand its good becuase having them here makes me so anxious I feel physically sick but on the other confirms that they don't consider me or 'my' boys to be worth seeing. Dh doesn't want to go along with her because he's always fought the 'well they aren't really anything to do with us' thing they have not given up on even though we have been together now for 8 years but it would just be easier all round.
post #137 of 147

annettemarie.....how did your busy night go?
post #138 of 147
Originally Posted by AngelBee View Post

annettemarie.....how did your busy night go?
It went OK--Michael has lots of buddies on his soccer team and it really wore him out-- but when we went to pick up Katie Grace from Brownies, the troop leader informed me that "all" the moms wanted to change the time to 6:00. That's impossible. We could maybe do 6:15 with a sack supper in the car, but I'm not bringing her 15 minutes late to every meeting. So if she won't compromise, we have to find a new troop, which has Katie Grace really upset.
post #139 of 147
We're in the process too of figuring out the schedules between school, ballet, gymnastics, soccer, and preschool. So far so good.

We're also trying to stream line things so as to help with the clutter. Basically, we need to throw things right away as far as paper work goes. DH also needs to revamp the main closet so we can organize each person's coat, shoes/boots, hats/mittens.
post #140 of 147
I really want to chime in on the busy schedules but it just overwhelms me. I try to limit the activites but it seems we always end up with double the number I want and I forget to factor in the things dh and I do.

As a homeschooler I find that I really need to keep my mornings at home for school and household reasons, then we have naps (in an ideal world) and newspaper routes for the older two. I hate that so many elementary school age activites are in the evening at what I think of as dinner time or run late (past 8:00) and mess with our bedtimes for the littler ones. Ideally sports and other activities would be after school wouldn't they? I mean, don't the kids who were in school all day need to run around a bit and then have a family dinner and relax or do homework before bed? I guess this started because our music teacher doesn't like to give homeschoolers afterschool slots since we are available (in her eyes) in the mornings. Sorry for the rant.

The best solution I have had is to limit the number of activities for each child and for me each day. I also carry a calendar so that I never try to remember my schedule on the fly (which always results in overbooking, like an airline I then need to bump somebody and it is never taken well).
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