Keeping after birth (in the hospital) the way you want it?

[Miny20]

For various reasons that will not change we're having our second baby in the hospital. I've met with several of the practitioners are my hospital and am pretty confident that my birthing experience with be more pleasant this time around than my last. It's an HMO/Hospital that strives to save money so they don't push drugs and prefer you to use a midwife over an OB.

My concerns actually rest in our post birth experience. I would like to avoid some things, change those I don't like, etc. I'm not sure how to show confidence in myself and just let the hospital staff know what I want. I have a tendency to get shy, giggle a little bit, and then get 'bullied' into things because I don't have the back bone to stand up for myself.

For instance, I don't want the baby bathed right away--and when she is, I don't want them to use Johnson's products, you know? My only problem is I have no idea where to even start with finding a product that I WILL like. I used to like Burt's Bees, but it seems to strongly scented. Does anyone have any suggestions for good, natural soaps to use on our baby?

We also plan to use our cloth diapers from the get go. I have an appointment with the pediatrician next week. When I spoke with my OB yesterday she told me she didn't imagine this would be an issue, but that speaking with the pediatrician would give me more information on that. My best approach with the pediatrician, I think is that our first child has super sensitive skin and we don't want to do anything that might bring on the strong eczema that she got right away after birth--but went away after we started using cloth and stopped using supermarket baby products.

I guess I'm just starting to feel really stressed out about the fact that I'm going to have another baby SOON. Oh dear! I need to tie up some loose ends. I don't think I've even really asked any direct questions.. I'm just feeling super overwhelmed!

[applejuice]

Bring a doula, your SO, and maybe a few tough looking relatives to give you the backbone you do not have. I have the same problem, which is why I had my babies at home and stayed away from the whole hospital scene all together.

I beg you to do the same. I am in Los Angeles also, and I know there are plenty of homebirth midwives around here.

[True Blue]

As far as diapers go, there is no reason they shouldn't "allow" cloth...I changed all my baby's diapers anyway! (DS was born in a hospital) They bathed in-room so I don't see how asking them to wait should be a big deal, nor should using your own soap. It's your baby, so I don't see how they should have objections, especially to such minor things.

[Twinklefae]

The best way to avoid the bath, and minimize chance exposure to anything else is to leave the hospital as soon as medically advisable. (Or whatever. I'm trying to avoid saying "as soon as they will let you" ) At my local hospital you must stay a minimum of 6 hours after a standard vaginal birth. (To check for hemmoraging and baby related problems) We plan to leave as soon as that time is up. It's on my chart already. Here, that means that we won't likely even be moved to the "family Newborn care" unit, where they do things like argue about the bath and the diapers.

[phreedom]

I don't see why those things should be a big deal to honor. There is no reason why a baby "has" to be bathed immediately after birth. It's done mainly for aesthetic reasons. And cloth diapers shouldn't be a big deal either, especially if your going to be the one changing them.

[hapersmion]

I agree with the PPs. Also, if you never let them take your baby out of family's arms, you won't have to worry about what soap they might use. Or other things.

hapersmion

[TinyFrog]

I love the soap from yesterdaysconnection.com. My favorite is the mint but I recommend these:

Bar soap for eczema, etc

or for a newborn this one might be best
plain bar

[Neldavi]

I have a tendency to get shy, giggle a little bit, and then get 'bullied' into things because I don't have the back bone to stand up for myself.

Well you're just gonna have to channel your inner bitch, then.

I inferred from your post that your first baby was also born in a hospital? If so, then I don't need to tell you about the power trips and intimidation that can happen. Which is why you're posting, I know. (My first was born at home, 2nd in hospital for slight prematurity).

I think the best advice is to bring as many people as possible who are tough and will advocate for you, and leave the people-pleasers at home.

Know your rights. Know your facts. Know that you can say no to ANYTHING in the absence of a court order. I know this sounds extreme, but that's the reality.

[Neldavi]

Another thing is, you really don't have to explain yourself, especially for minor things like bathing. Just say "no thanks, not right now". And repeat when they try to argue. Be polite, but firm.

[AngelaB]

Have all of the newborn care stated clearly in your birthplan so everyone can refer to it. My birth plan goes over labor and delivery, in case of c-section, newborn procedures, and in case baby is ill.

Have your dp or doula ready to stay with baby at all times and to be your advocate based on your plan. Your doula can watch after you and dp can be in charge of baby. Everything should be done in your room though. Have your doula and dp remind doc that you want to have baby on your belly or chest directly after coming out of you instead of being wisked away as well as cord clamping and what not. I couldnt advocate for myself since I was focused on working at the time so dh kept an eye on things.

Dp washed my ds2 in our room and we did all diaper changes and all weighing and measuring was done in our room. Ds2 went to the nursery once and I went with him for a blood sugar screen. they were all pretty accomadating, however we were on our toes to refuse things like shots.
Angela