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I'm so confused (I'm pregnant with fraternal twins)

post #1 of 55
Thread Starter 
http://www.ibnlive.com/news/vegan-mo.../10981-17.html

I mean WHAT THE HELL? The only thing I can point to is my age (I'm 31), the fact I (we) didn't START to conceive until I was 31, plus I was on birth control pills for 12 years? I would think my being vegan would have made me much less likely to have twins. I've learned the family connection there actually isn't a relation because my grandfather's male sibling had IDENTICAL twins (which according to some studies I've read aren't related at all to likelihood to having fraternal twins). To my knowledge there are NO fraternal twins at ALL in my family. Jesse just wants to think this is a fluke or "luck" but I can't help but think I did something to contribute to this!

We DID wait at least 3 months after I stopped taking the birth control to try and conceive. Maybe my body was reacting in overdrive? Also I'd ran a 1/2 marathon right previous to conceiving. Could that have wacked out my body? My weight hadn't fluctuated or anything though except for I'd gained 9 pounds during those 3 weeks we were in Germany Austria and Czech Republic (but I attest that to not having run at ALL during the trip and eating whatever the heck I wanted, but I STILL hardly ate any dairy I swear!)

I'm stumped and I know I should just "ACCEPT", but I can't help feeling this is my fault heh. Maybe it's cause I had a pastry with dairy in it in Austria (lol) but seriously I RARELY eat dairy. I've been vegan 99% since 1997. I swear even when I was a vegetarian as a KID I never ate eggs or even cow's milk THEN. I'm just so confused
post #2 of 55
Your age does increase your chance of having fraternal twins, and other than that, well, sometimes these things do just randomly happen.

I guess I don't understand why, at this point, it matters whether or not any of the things you did increased your chances of having fraternal twins? Would it make you feel better to have a specific explanation, something you could point to and say THAT, there, that's why?

I question the article's suggestion that fraternal twinning is entirely the result of heredity and diet. There are other factors in the mix. Anyway, the article doesn't say that vegan women don't have fraternal twins, just that they are less likely to do so. Looks like you're one of the lucky few.

Oh - and your grandfather's siblings wouldn't have much effect on your genetic chances even if they were fraternal: twinning is passed through the maternal line. If they were your grandmother's siblings, that would be different. Nonetheless, determining for sure that a pair of twins is identical and not fraternal takes a fairly sophisticated blood test.
post #3 of 55
I guess I don't really even know what to say other then Congratulations? You sound dismayed and I am sure that it this has come as a shock that you are getting the two for one deal ( I always tease my mom about this, as I am a fraternal twin and she didn't even know she was having twins until she was in the delivery room). I guess I feel sad for you that you think you are getting twins because you did something or ate something wrong. I hope all works out well for you and the babies. (((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))
post #4 of 55
I have 4 1/2 year old fraternals. Admittedly I was omni at the time (still eating chicken but that was it) but I was 24, never been on birth control OR fertility treatment and while there was one set of fraternals that Mum's sister had she has the only recorded fraternals in the entire family history so was told she was a "freak of nature" I didn't even find out until 21 weeks that I was having twins as no one suspected.

I'm not quite sure what to make of your post like the others. Are you happy? Or devastated? I was in shock for a long time. I cried for the first hour, then I thought it was the best thing ever, then I was shocked again, then I was just plain terrified once we started getting the 2nd bassinette/cot/highchair etc.

I'll say congratulations and hope that you are at least somewhat happy about this in your panic somewhere. (and there's plenty of us twin Mummy's on here if you need advice or a shoulder!)
post #5 of 55
Thread Starter 
I'm VERY scared. I want to be excited trust me (and I feel guilty for being this way) but I don't know how to get my head around around HOW IN THE HECK AM I GONNA DO THIS ??????????????

I'm just really in a LOT of shock (never expected this). I'm seeing a counselor and gonna get involved in a mothering multiples support group.
post #6 of 55
It says "Vegan moms less likely to have twins," not "It is impossible for vegan moms to have twins."

Congratulations on your double blessings. Stop looking for "blame," you'll never know why it happened.
post #7 of 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by PurpleMonkey View Post
I'm VERY scared. I want to be excited trust me (and I feel guilty for being this way) but I don't know how to get my head around around HOW IN THE HECK AM I GONNA DO THIS ??????????????

I'm just really in a LOT of shock (never expected this). I'm seeing a counselor and gonna get involved in a mothering multiples support group.
You'll do just fine! I know it's terrifying wondering what on earth you're going to do with 2 babies but you CAN do it!!! It's tougher than one, I won't lie to you but you'll survive (and when the initial panic is over it's terribly exciting to have 2!!!)

Do you have supportive parents and in laws? It's amazing the difference just an extra set of hands can make at the beginning too.
post #8 of 55
Thread Starter 
we are blessed with the support. It's just it took my husband and I years to decide Hey we're gonna do it! We've ALWAYS (both) wanted kids but have REEALLYY enjoyed our time "together' too. I can't help but wonder is this God's punishment for me waiting? lol

please know I am overall wanting this and trying to be excited but I can't even CONCEIVE of thinking of being able to manage TWO. I'm not even a mom of ONE yet !
post #9 of 55
I know two moms who had 3 kids then had surprise pgs that were twins. Both were shocked and felt kind of like you do now. One now has 2yo's and the other is about to deliver any day. I know that the one with 2yo's says it's totally different than having just 1 but it is doable. Congrats!
post #10 of 55
Hey - the really cool thing is that veg*n mums are more likely to carry twins all the way to term :-)
post #11 of 55
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Helen_A View Post
Hey - the really cool thing is that veg*n mums are more likely to carry twins all the way to term :-)
really? How do you know that? THAT really calms me down.

thanks for the positive vibes everyone
post #12 of 55
I don't have the reference - but I was told it by an eminent UK midwife. Part based on its own study into the presence of green and orange veg in the diet and pregnancy term, and part on longitudial data :-)
post #13 of 55
Thread Starter 
I believe you
post #14 of 55
You know, this thought just occurred to me - how do you know they're fraternal? From my understanding, it's very difficult to definitively detect in utero, unless you know they're different sexes (which it seems too early for you to know if you're due in Jan). They could just as likely be identical, which would make it just a totally random fluke. Would that make you feel better? Either way, you will handle it, I promise!
post #15 of 55
Thread Starter 
from the ultrasound they detected 2 separate amniotic sacs and placentas
post #16 of 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by PurpleMonkey View Post
from the ultrasound they detected 2 separate amniotic sacs and placentas
They can still be identical. It depends on when the egg split if there are 2 sacs or 1, 2 placentas or 1.

From wikipedia:
Quote:
When one egg is fertilized by one sperm cell, and then divides and separates, two identical cells will result. If the zygote splits very early (in the first 2 days after fertilization) they may develop separate placentas (chorion) and separate sacs (amnion). These are called dichorionic, diamniotic (or "di/di") twins, which occurs 20-30% of the time. Most of the time in identical twins the zygote will split after 2 days, resulting in a shared placenta, but two separate sacs. These are called monochorionic, diamniotic ("mono/di") twins. In about 1% of identical twins the splitting occurs late enough to result in both a shared placenta and a shared sac called; monochorionic, monoamniotic ("mono/mono") twins. Finally, the zygote may split extremely late, resulting in conjoined twins.
post #17 of 55
Thread Starter 
I'm confused. We were TOLD we are having fraternal twins. Now I'm more scared than ever
post #18 of 55
Identical twins are nothing to be scared of -- we have 6 sets of them btwn my parents' siblings & cousins and my siblings & cousins.

I wouldn't, at this point, worry that much about whether they are identical or fraternal. Just work on getting used to the idea of two. They will be a blessing either way, once you get over the shock.
post #19 of 55
Thread Starter 
it's just there are so many issues, like societal pressures and such, I would expect with stigmatism of identicals (I would imagine they'd have more complexes about their IDENTITY, right?). I am so stressed about this I am thinking even wayyy into the future like when they are teenagers. My head's been : ever since finding out two and I'm sorry but my coping strategies SUCK. At least with fraternal they'd be like "normal" brother and sister, right? Obviously I'm not cut out for EITHER CASE!
post #20 of 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by PurpleMonkey View Post
it's just there are so many issues, like societal pressures and such, I would expect with stigmatism of identicals (I would imagine they'd have more complexes about their IDENTITY, right?). I am so stressed about this I am thinking even wayyy into the future like when they are teenagers. My head's been : ever since finding out two and I'm sorry but my coping strategies SUCK. At least with fraternal they'd be like "normal" brother and sister, right? Obviously I'm not cut out for EITHER CASE!
Physically yes, I find my girls have some odd quirks that you don't find in siblings but do find in twins. And do try not to panic quite so much! It WILL be okay!!! I know it's so much to wrap your head around, believe me, I was an emotional wreck for a while once we found out but once they're here instinct kicks in and you do great. Plus like you said, you have plenty of family support which is the most important thing and you're joining the mothers of multiples club (not sure what it's called in the US). Just try to relax and enjoy your pregnancy as much as women can "enjoy" pregnancy.

Yes, there will be tough times and possibly more so than with one baby but on the other side of the scale the joy and happiness is doubled as well (and the best bit is that you get 2 children for the price of a single pregnancy ).
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