I have heard of people that have schizophrenia, bi-polar, and a few other disorders having a sudden onset after smoking pot for a while. The pot did not create the disorders (they were already there), but it did uncover them for the user.
Though it may or may not affect this conversation, but my son is adopted. He has experienced some trauma in his life. He also shows many attributes of ADHD. It is possible that he could use pot as a way to process pain or to use as a crutch or something. Or it is possible that he could try it and just like getting giggly and stuff with his friends. He may like the calming effects. He may like that it gives him the munchies (he has a low appitite and it bothers him often, especially when he feels low energy and knows its because he should eat, but just does not FEEL like eating). He could self-medicate. He could become addicted. It could uncover schizophrenia. He could really like to just zone out on video games and read. He may not like it at all. It could give him a head ache. I do not know. I would like to keep no knowing, because I would like for him to not smoke pot.
I have not
allowed him to become addicted to cigs nor have I let him play with drugs. I have had some really great conversations, I have lots a lot of sleep, I have asked for suggestions on how to do things differently, and I have not shut the door on any subject or possible way to handle it. Shame on me for not being a good parent
: I am not being just a friend to my son. But I do not think that parents need to be unfriendly or unfriendlike. I think that the trend in our culture to justify being disconnected from our children by feeling like we are hurting them by also being their friend is really sad.
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| However, if you are fully engaged in various constructive activities be it skating, snowboarding, martial arts, team sports, chess etc... and majority if not all of your peer base and adults in your life are not down with MJ, drinking etc... The chances of using are minimized. |
This makes sense to me. Even if he does still try pot, having other interests and activities is great, and the pot may be a passing fancy, but the martial arts and chess team may last well through his adulthood.
My son's interest with pot seems to be with "hippie culture", Oregon subculture, self-exploration, etc. "Trying on hats" about what kind of teen he is and want to be. My husband is getting our son together with some of the people through the SCA tonight that both do and do not smoke, for conversations on why, the ups and downs in their personal lives, how it has affected them, etc (especially since so many ARE that cool, self-exploring, active hippie type that DON'T smoke... and a few that do are the ones that would likely discourage it and talk about some of the realities - ie. use it for pain management, have tried to quit and can't, have been arrested, etc).
I have been talking to my son at length about the level of responsibility and things he needs to consider when thinking of experimenting with pot. There is so much more to it than spending $10 at the skatepark to some kid with pot and then grabbing a pop can. I have discussed the legal side, the ethical sides that I can see with buying it, getting other people involved, the risks in getting caught on the effect on the family, knowing where the pot is coming from, getting involved in a "scene", etc. Meanwhile, I am getting the boys involved with a peaceful anarchy group and Food not Bombs (for that "cool" hippie crowd through volunteering and service work in a public place). I want to get them into a bike repair and riding group, rock climbing, concerts and music with a focus on learning to PLAY music, too (we wrote on several instruments last night on Craigslist), etc. They are also starting to show an interest in martial arts - something that I intend to support completely and enthusiastically. Unlike some of the posters on MDC, I am not anti-exploration... especially in a thoughtful and academic way (which is what it is right now). This can be a wonderful time in a teen's life; it seems like our culture is scared of our older children and sees teens (especially boys) as "bad". I, on the other hand, am just glad that the kids have allowed me to be part of this process (as opposed to thinking they are skating and drinking soda and get a call from the police because some older kids was pulled over, my kids were with them, and they are drinking and smoking).
When faced with the situation I'm not entirely sure how I would go about it. Perhaps you could ask him what is so appealing about MJ? Is it observing older pot smoking teens and the culture that accompanies it? Is it the culture or the weed? The culture can exist without the weed.
)And the concern would be that escaping would more than likely drive further use. Getting him engaged in a group than is not drug using would be a great idea. The idea is keep him busy with activities there's no time to smoke weed.
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