I am frustrated to no end with my dh attitude when it comes to nighttime feedings....
My dh has been out of town for 3 weeks and just got back for a couple of days before going back out of town for another couple of weeks. So he has fallen into the luxury of getting a full nights sleep without interruption.
At home we cosleep with our dd#2, who is almost a year old, in between us. Until a couple of months ago (I'd say 3 maybe) dd#2 was nursing 5-6 times a night. She obviously didn't need the nutrition and was seeking comfort for teething....however, at the time I was pregnant with my twin babies and it was getting to be too much.
So, after MUCH discussion (almost too much discussion if ykwim) my dh would take my dd#2 out to the couch after she would rouse for the first time after her feed and settle her down to sleep with her there and only come in before he headed off to work at 6:00 am. Even after 6:00 am I would still feed her probably another 2-3 times before 9:00 am.
At first she would fuss and toss a fit, but she would quickly settle down to sleep. If she would continue to fuss past 5 mins, I would come out and feed her because maybe she was hungry.
Anyways....it only took a week and dh was able to come back to bed with her and all he would have to do then is to take her into the crook of his arm and shush her with her falling back to sleep immediatly. She then learned that when she is hungry to crawl over to me and tap me awake (really sweet) and I nurse her and she'd go back to sleep. We definitely worked through that challenge.
So fast forward a month and a half and my twin babies die and I miscarry and my dh goes out of town. So now I am back to nursing her 4-5 times a night.
He is now home for a couple of days and now wants me to just feed her so he can go back to sleep
: . Last night, I think that I actually growled at him....
He said "well, what do you want me to do?"
: I told him "Howabout you whip out a tit and feed her if you think she is that hungry!!!"
Guess who slept out on the couch?
Anyways, this comes back to whenever he thinks that she needs to be comforted/quieted down day or night, he just hands her off to me to give her the boob. I have no problem (and I am sure in a number of peoples opinion, I am too gratuidous with the boob) feeding her as a method of comfort. FWIW, I am heading into my 5th year of bfing so I kinda know a thing or two about bfing my babes...
But what I object to is when dh makes these calls because it is inconvient for him to deal with her....
How do I deal with him without biting his head off or him storming off in a snit? (Trust me, I've tried the 'talking it through' approach and it still ends with him in a snit). WWYD?
My dh has been out of town for 3 weeks and just got back for a couple of days before going back out of town for another couple of weeks. So he has fallen into the luxury of getting a full nights sleep without interruption.
At home we cosleep with our dd#2, who is almost a year old, in between us. Until a couple of months ago (I'd say 3 maybe) dd#2 was nursing 5-6 times a night. She obviously didn't need the nutrition and was seeking comfort for teething....however, at the time I was pregnant with my twin babies and it was getting to be too much.
So, after MUCH discussion (almost too much discussion if ykwim) my dh would take my dd#2 out to the couch after she would rouse for the first time after her feed and settle her down to sleep with her there and only come in before he headed off to work at 6:00 am. Even after 6:00 am I would still feed her probably another 2-3 times before 9:00 am.
At first she would fuss and toss a fit, but she would quickly settle down to sleep. If she would continue to fuss past 5 mins, I would come out and feed her because maybe she was hungry.
Anyways....it only took a week and dh was able to come back to bed with her and all he would have to do then is to take her into the crook of his arm and shush her with her falling back to sleep immediatly. She then learned that when she is hungry to crawl over to me and tap me awake (really sweet) and I nurse her and she'd go back to sleep. We definitely worked through that challenge.
So fast forward a month and a half and my twin babies die and I miscarry and my dh goes out of town. So now I am back to nursing her 4-5 times a night.
He is now home for a couple of days and now wants me to just feed her so he can go back to sleep
: . Last night, I think that I actually growled at him....He said "well, what do you want me to do?"
: I told him "Howabout you whip out a tit and feed her if you think she is that hungry!!!"Guess who slept out on the couch?
Anyways, this comes back to whenever he thinks that she needs to be comforted/quieted down day or night, he just hands her off to me to give her the boob. I have no problem (and I am sure in a number of peoples opinion, I am too gratuidous with the boob) feeding her as a method of comfort. FWIW, I am heading into my 5th year of bfing so I kinda know a thing or two about bfing my babes...
But what I object to is when dh makes these calls because it is inconvient for him to deal with her....
How do I deal with him without biting his head off or him storming off in a snit? (Trust me, I've tried the 'talking it through' approach and it still ends with him in a snit). WWYD?
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