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This is probably the most odd question ever asked here. - Page 2

post #21 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:32pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by abimommy View Post
You should ask him if he is a zombie too while you are at it.

How about "So...you doing any meth lately? Green Eggs and Ham? You wouldn't happen to be a zombie would you?
:

But seriously. Assuming he's not a zombie or a Dr. Seuss fan, what would you do in this situation?
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post #22 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:33pm
Nevermind, wrong person sorry!
post #23 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:33pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by a_work_in_progress View Post
Call the cops if you suspect he has drugs in the house around kids.
Yeah...the thing about the cops is, his brother is a cop in the town he lives in. :
post #24 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:34pm
Oh...oh dear.

Well I would mention to judge he is looking like he is doing meth and ask for a drug test for visitation.
post #25 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:34pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisie125 View Post
Forgive me from bringing info from another thread here, but isn't he behind on his CS? That with this information kind of screams drug use.

I don't know what you would do about it other than report him to the courts if he has visitation rights...
No, he's never missed a payment or even been late. And we've never been to court, so he's not even really required to pay CS (other than morally required). He's a really good father and does a great job with DD, as far as I can tell...

No set visitation, so there's no judge to report anything to. I knew this no court thing would come back to bite me in the butt one of these days.
post #26 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:35pm
Meth. That stuff does nasty thing to teeth and of course body, mind and soul.

If you have not seen meth mouth before here is this.
DO NOT CLICK ON IF YOU DONT WANT TO SEE METH MOUTH!




Sorry I have to laugh about all these green egg and ham and ZOMBIEEEEEE jokes!
post #27 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by becoming View Post
No, he's never missed a payment or even been late. And we've never been to court, so he's not even really required to pay CS (other than morally required). He's a really good father and does a great job with DD, as far as I can tell...
I already edited before you posted, I was thinking of someone else, sorry!
post #28 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:36pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by becoming View Post
Yeah...the thing about the cops is, his brother is a cop in the town he lives in. :
Are you friendly with the brother? Or any of his family? I really think you need to find out what's going on before you can decide how to go forward. Because really, if it's meth, I'd be all over chaning the custody agreement.
post #29 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:37pm
Info on and photo of meth mouth:

http://www.doctorspiller.com/tooth_d...htm#Meth_Mouth

WARNING! Icky tooth decay photo.

ETA: Doriansmummy, looks like we were posting at the same time. My link has more info etc. and only one photo, if you want info.
post #30 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:38pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by NiteNicole View Post
Are you friendly with the brother? Or any of his family? I really think you need to find out what's going on before you can decide how to go forward. Because really, if it's meth, I'd be all over chaning the custody agreement.
I don't really know his brother very well, but I am very friendly with his parents. Thing is, though, she is like the mom on Everybody Loves Raymond, with my DD's father being Raymond...her precious baby who does no wrong. I think she would be horribly offended and probably never speak to me again if I even *suggested* that her baby was doing drugs.
post #31 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:41pm
Are you and the father able to talk like civil people or is there issues? If you can talk I would say what you have noticed and that you are worried about him as your daughters father and ask him whats going on.
post #32 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:42pm
Thread Starter 
We are pretty friendly now, but I have seen the kind of awful, hateful person he can be, and I don't want to do anything that will bring that part of him out again since I have to deal with him at least a couple times a week. I can't imagine what I would say that wouldn't cause him to be defensive and angry.
post #33 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by abimommy View Post
You should ask him if he is a zombie too while you are at it.

How about "So...you doing any meth lately? Green Eggs and Ham? You wouldn't happen to be a zombie would you?
: : : :

You have no idea how hard I am laughing. Between that and the cops doing their laundry... I had to try to explain to my 9 year old why I am laughing like this.
post #34 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:46pm
Here is a picture gallery I found on 'Meth Mouth' so maybe you can get a better idea if it could be that. http://www.mappsd.org/Meth%20Mouth%2...%20Gallery.htm and another http://www.drugfree.org/Portal/DrugI...eth_mouth.html

It's the fact that both of them have this problem that makes me think Meth or other drugs are the most likely cause. Meth is really serious, I remember hearing about a horrible news stories of a Meth high father who killed both his sons while high. (http://www.theindychannel.com/news/9366926/detail.html)

I think the next time I saw him I would ask him straight out why his teeth are rotting and has he been doing drugs. I would tell him that these drugs are extremely serious and if he is doing them it compromises his ability to take care of his children, and so you will not be allowing him to be alone with the children until he proves to you that he is not on these drugs. I'm not sure what else to do, because it really compromises his ability to be trusted with the children, I would rather risk a fight or offense than something horrible happening to my kids.
post #35 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:48pm
Could it be lead poisoning or some other kind of problem in the water or some such thing? Just another thought if there aren't other signs of meth use.
post #36 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:52pm
Is there anything else that would indicate drug use besides the teeth? How bad are the teeth?

If there are other things, you might just have to be forward and direct. You might say "I've noticed some signs that you might be getting into drugs and I'm worried." simple as that. Then, let him go from there and he'll either reassure you or get paranoid and angry (meaning yes, he's on drugs) If he frowns, looks around scared-like and says "Who told you that?" in a paranoid voice....better keep your daughter away from him and insist on drug testing before visitation.

That's some serious stuff. I'd start doing some research on it. You might even call the cop brother and say "look, I'm worried about such and such because of what other people have been telling me. Can you look into it before it gets serious? I didn't know who to talk to about it, but I think I can trust you to find out if he's ok" If he cares for his brother, he'll want to make sure he gets to his brother and gets it taken care of.

Good luck
Lisa
post #37 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:55pm
seriouisly? do something! methheads can be violent and unpredictable. hes not a zombie. hes not eating green eggs and ham. he's either REALLY REALLY sick, or he;s tweaking. either way, letting him around your kids is negligent.

here's what i'd do. i'd call the cops. i'd ask to speak to brothers supervisor. i'd let super know what was going on.

then, i'd go to court. i'd sue for full custody, and demand a drug test of him AND the girlfriend.

i'd quiz my older kids--how has daddy been acting. what food is in the house (meth can cause an anoretic decrease in appetite, hence why most tweakers are stick thin).

if all that failed, i'd send the kids to visit, and then call cps.
post #38 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:58pm
Doing some other google searches, chewing tobacco also came up as a possiblity, something that would discolor.

I guess it comes down to what you mean by 'rotten-looking'. If they are just discolored, I would proceed cautiously and maybe ask - perhaps they are drinking a lot of a particular thing that is making their teeth look funny. I know my DH's teeth look gray when he drinks red wine.

If they look rotten like the less severe teeth in the meth mouth photos I'd assume drugs and take the steps to protect my children first, though of course attempt to proceed as diplomatically and cautiously as possible when confronting him.
post #39 of 58
8/22/07 at 6:59pm
Thread Starter 
They aren't rotten like any of the photos I've seen of meth mouth. They are mostly just green.
post #40 of 58
8/22/07 at 7:10pm
Hmm, maybe they've been drinking a lot of wheat grass? Green tea? Gatorade?

Found this article: http://www.emedicine.com/derm/topic646.htm

Quote:
Green stains are attributed to fluorescent bacteria and fungi such as Penicillium and Aspergillus species (Hattab, 1999).

...

Mercury and lead dust can cause a blue-green stain; copper and nickel, green–to–blue-green stain;

...

Green stain
  • Chromogenic bacteria
  • Tea
  • Metals
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