Please help my ignorance!

[GardenStream]

I had my first baby over in Germany. We never discussed circumcision with a doctor. It's highly abnormal over here for a boy to be circumcised.

I am going to have my second baby in America. If we have a boy I don't want him circumcised. Is my OB the person I need to discuss this with or will another doctor at the hospital ask me about it? I have heard stories of it being assumed the parents want it done and the parents don't find out about it until afterward. I absolutely don't want this to happen!

Andrea

[njeb]

Hello! Welcome to MDC, and Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Yes, definitely discuss this with your OB. He/She needs to know you do NOT want to have your son circumcised. Put it in your birth plan, too. Most circumcisions in the U.S. are done by OB's.

If this is an option for you, if you are low-risk, you may want to consider having a homebirth or one at a free-standing birth center, or have a midwife instead of a doctor. Midwives, especially homebirth midwives, are much more likely to be anti-circ. than doctors. Of course, if you need to have a doctor, feel free to ignore this paragraph.

Good luck! I'm sure someone with more knowledge than I will be along shortly.

[Mrs-Mama]

If you are birthing in a hospital, I would tell everyone that you do not want him circumsized. More than likely there will be a consent form for you to sign. Take a pen or marker (preferably red) and write "NO" in big letters on the form.

You will probably still get asked more than once.

[carriebft]

I agree with PPs, I was asked numerous times, which lead me to believe that just saying "no" to my OB or during registration would not have been enough. I might even suggest a onsie or diaper sticker that says not to circumcise him.

[myfairbabies]

Also, NEVER leave the baby alone. Either you or dh should be with him at all times. Can you believe you have to do all this to protect your son from mutilation in this country?

[Papai]

Originally Posted by notyetamommy

Also, NEVER leave the baby alone. Either you or dh should be with him at all times. Can you believe you have to do all this to protect your son from mutilation in this country?

It really is sad.

I was on edge in the hospital whenever they took him away for those pediatric check-ups. I kept reminding them that he was NOT to be circ'd.

Andrea, congrats! And once you go to the hospital, just make sure you tell them you don't want to circumcise your son. You might get asked again but they shouldn't do it without your consent.

[AntoninBeGonin]

We were only asked once, while I was in very early labor. Even so, Dh or I stayed with Little Guy every moment.

[mamasophy]

I think it depends on where in the US you deliver. We're in CA - had babes in Northern CA (Sonoma County/Petaluma) and in Santa Cruz (central CA coast) and other than a question on an intake form, we were never asked about circ - not at my appts or in the hospital. I had my 1st in 1991 and my last in 2002 (4 kids, 3 sons); 3 different hospitals, 1 fam. practitioner, 2 midwives and 1 OB. It was not mentioned except for a nurse right after my 1st came out, and she was asking in a guarded way (like hoping I'd say no) as part of the conversation, and when we both said "NO WAY!" all the people in the room said "GOOD!". Other than that it was never mentioned. We did have one of us with our babies the whole time, wherever they went, but circ was not a worry.
Congrats on your upcoming arrival!!

[phdmama06]

Congratulations on your pregnancy! How wonderful!

I did tell my OB at one of my prenatal appointments that I wasn't interested in circumcision. Also, when I got to the hospital, I told pretty much everyone (medical staff) that I came into contact with that I didn't want it either. That still didn't stop the OB on call coming to me the day after delivery to ask if I wanted to circumcise my son! Luckily I just said no and didn't hear anything else about it.

If you have a written birth plan, definitely put it on there, and when you fill out registration forms at the hospital (if you are delivering at a hospital), you can write "Don't circumcise" or something like that in big letters. You can bring a sharpie or stickers to put on your baby's diapers/T-shirts, or lay a written sign in the baby bassinet. I'd also recommend keeping your baby in your room with you as much as possible and having baby's dad and other family members make sure nobody circs or retracts the baby.

Best wishes with your delivery!!

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Mistakes still happen here one boy is mistaken for another and circed. The only way to be 100% sure that this dosnt happen is NEVER let them take your ds to the nursery without someone there with him.

Definatly do all the suggestions above as well. Anyone that enters your room tell them he is not to be circed. Any forms you fill out no matter what they are for put on them up at the top or in any open space DO NOT CIRCUMCISE!!!!!!. If you are asked more than once tell them no and you will sue if he is. That should get the message across pretty well.

Honestly after some of the horror stories I have read on here I would be a nervous wreck giving birth to a boy in the hospital

[mommy2caroline]

Here's a link to a form and some images you can use to make signs/stickers:

http://www.circumstitions.com/Refusal.html

[eepster]

In some areas the OB/GYN does it in others the pediatrician. In many teaching hospitals an unsupervised resident (first year after medical school before they get thier lisence) does it. So tell everyone.

You also need to worry about nurses trying to retract him to clean underneath.

Get self stick mailing lables. Using a program like MS Word print up a few sheets of them reading:

"If you touch my penis my mother will sue you
Do

not circumcise
Do not retract"
Then stick one on his diaper at each change. Makesure it goes right over the velcro tabs, so they can't get at his penis without ripping the sticker. This way if you fall asleep he is still safe.