Our neighbors have two sweet kids who play with dd. No problem there. But for some reason, the parents seem to attract friends who parent poorly and whose children are the worse for it.
Tonight there was a visiting 5 yo girl there playing with dd and her best friend, who are both 3.5 yo. First she was encouraging dd's best friend to not let dd play with her toys or join them in sidewalk chalk drawing. This is totally counter to dd's best friends nature, as she is normally a very sweet and generous little girl, and very good to dd. I took care of that issue by going over and sitting on the pavement next to the girls and helping dd's best friend deal with the prodding and coercion from the other girl. Dd would say "Best friend, can I play with some chalk?" The girl would say "No! We're playing with it, right?" And I'd say "Oh look, Best Friend. Here's a piece of chalk. I think there's enough for everyone, and it's really not nice to talk that way. Do you mind if dd plays?" Once they had a little bit of basic parental supervision they settled in and played nicely
The kids then retired to the trampoline, which is about 4 feet off the ground and surrounded by a webbing to keep the kids from falling off. The three moms (me, neighbor, bad mom) were sitting nearby. After jumping for a while dd announced she was getting off. She unzipped the webbing and stepped out but was still on the trampoline springs. As she turned to step onto the stepladder the girl pushed her from behind and she fell 4 feet landing on her face on hard packed dirt
: .
I went and picked her up, and Best Friend kept repeating that the girl had pushed dd when she had her back turned (and the girl was right there at the edge). I asked dd what happened and she said the same thing. The mom just sat there watching and didn't say anything. I went over to the girl and was eye to eye with her as she was on the trampoline. I said very slowly and clearly, and loud enough so that mom could hear, "So-and-so, I don't want you to EVER hurt dd." Long pause. "Do you understand what I'm telling you?" She kind of gulped and nodded and I carried dd over to the chairs.
The little girl came over and apologized on her own later. Her mom never did say anything or give her any kind of direction or guidance during the entire incident. Or the entire evening, for that matter.
No advice needed, I guess. I just needed to decompress.
Tonight there was a visiting 5 yo girl there playing with dd and her best friend, who are both 3.5 yo. First she was encouraging dd's best friend to not let dd play with her toys or join them in sidewalk chalk drawing. This is totally counter to dd's best friends nature, as she is normally a very sweet and generous little girl, and very good to dd. I took care of that issue by going over and sitting on the pavement next to the girls and helping dd's best friend deal with the prodding and coercion from the other girl. Dd would say "Best friend, can I play with some chalk?" The girl would say "No! We're playing with it, right?" And I'd say "Oh look, Best Friend. Here's a piece of chalk. I think there's enough for everyone, and it's really not nice to talk that way. Do you mind if dd plays?" Once they had a little bit of basic parental supervision they settled in and played nicely
The kids then retired to the trampoline, which is about 4 feet off the ground and surrounded by a webbing to keep the kids from falling off. The three moms (me, neighbor, bad mom) were sitting nearby. After jumping for a while dd announced she was getting off. She unzipped the webbing and stepped out but was still on the trampoline springs. As she turned to step onto the stepladder the girl pushed her from behind and she fell 4 feet landing on her face on hard packed dirt
: .I went and picked her up, and Best Friend kept repeating that the girl had pushed dd when she had her back turned (and the girl was right there at the edge). I asked dd what happened and she said the same thing. The mom just sat there watching and didn't say anything. I went over to the girl and was eye to eye with her as she was on the trampoline. I said very slowly and clearly, and loud enough so that mom could hear, "So-and-so, I don't want you to EVER hurt dd." Long pause. "Do you understand what I'm telling you?" She kind of gulped and nodded and I carried dd over to the chairs.
The little girl came over and apologized on her own later. Her mom never did say anything or give her any kind of direction or guidance during the entire incident. Or the entire evening, for that matter.
No advice needed, I guess. I just needed to decompress.
s
: I think you handled it really well and calmly.
