inappropriate TV? WWYD? - Page 5

[UnschoolnMa]

Dd watched 8 Mile when she was 11 or so I think. She found it really interesting. Much before that though and I think she'd have been both bored with it in places and embarrased in others.

[shpica]

I am on the side of restricting TV. I don't like my 3 yo watching Power Rangers, Ying Yang Yo, Billy and Mandy and a whole lot of others. I don't know why, I just don't. He will never watch The Simpsons while he's living in my house no matter how old he is.

Kids pick up things off of tv, that's why my son and another I know say "ah, man" from Dora the Explorer.

Now I do have a teenager in the house and he has his own tv in his room, which I never liked but since he's my DH's child and not mine that was not one battle I didn't wanted to continue to fight. When he watches tv in the living room, anything he watches has to be G rated, okay for the kids to watch. Needless to say he doesn't watch much here, he'd rather go to his room. And BTW a year ago or so he made the transition from watching TV alot to being online alot. He'd rather be playing Rune Scape than watch TV. Your son might do the same. Which, by the way you can also block websites by keywords: sex, boobs, kill, etc.

About restricting TV, we have cable and cable boxes on all the tv's in the house so that I can block any channel I want. I can block by channel, by tv rating, or by time. The TV my 3 yo watches is blocked all the time so if he wants to watch something I have to put in a pin number for him to watch just that show or just that channel or anything for a specific time range. The little booger new how to turn on the tv a long time ago. Your satellite company should have something like that, or maybe your tv does. Every show has a rating so call your satellite company they might have a suggestion for you. And that'll enforce your decision and prevent "sneaking" a unapproved show in.

[aniT]

Originally Posted by shpica

Now I do have a teenager in the house and he has his own tv in his room, which I never liked but since he's my DH's child and not mine that was not one battle I didn't wanted to continue to fight. When he watches tv in the living room, anything he watches has to be G rated, okay for the kids to watch. Needless to say he doesn't watch much here, he'd rather go to his room. And BTW a year ago or so he made the transition from watching TV alot to being online alot. He'd rather be playing Rune Scape than watch TV. Your son might do the same. Which, by the way you can also block websites by keywords: sex, boobs, kill, etc.

I think I would rather a teenager watch TV with the family than in a room by himself. Then at least you would know what he is watching and could talk about it. Also going off to his room all the time by himself probably makes him feel like his not part of the family. Especially with you calling him your "DH's child" as opposed to your stepson.

[purslaine]

We have discoverred Runescape. Both Ds and DH play it - it is cool with me.

I know you do not think you have a say in whether stepson has a TV in his room (and maybe you don't) but with regards to the other children, I would not allow Tv or computers* to go into their rooms.

We only have 1 TV and I love it!!! Yes, Ds is a naggy little guy...but there are 5 people in this household, so, at most, Ds is entitled to TV 1/5 of the time. It is a naturally occuring boundary, yk? Much better than the control issue mommy-kind.

Kathy

* I would try to make a case for removing the computer from the bedroom for safety reasons (cyber-bullying, internet predators, gaming, porn, etc). Perhaps you could suggest a compromise with DH - TV in stepsons room, but no Computer? IMHO 14 is too young to have a computer in a non-public space.

[UnschoolnMa]

We've had no problem with TV's and computers in rooms here. My son has both in his room, and Dd has a TV in her room often. It works well for us because we can all watch what we are interested in if different shows come on at the same time, ya know?

[aniT]

Originally Posted by UnschoolnMa

We've had no problem with TV's and computers in rooms here. My son has both in his room, and Dd has a TV in her room often. It works well for us because we can all watch what we are interested in if different shows come on at the same time, ya know?

Same here. Although DD does not have satellite in her room. She does however watch CSI and other shows over the air with an antenna. She also has her DVD player and picks movies from DH's huge collection of movies. Since we have no "adult" type movies.. she is free to watch any of the movies she wants. (there are plenty of R rated ones.) She also has a laptop that she uses in her room, or where ever the mood strikes her.

[orangefoot]

Originally Posted by shpica

I don't know why, I just don't.

This is going to be a tricky position to maintain in the future unless you are training your children to never challenge or question you.

Originally Posted by shpica

He will never watch The Simpsons while he's living in my house no matter how old he is.

Is the Simpsons the epitome of all that is evil in the world? Have I missed something? All the children in our house leap onto the sofa Simpson-style at 6pm and we all love watching it.

We have only 1 tv in the house and I don't want the boys to be in their room watching tv on their own: I would rather they argue over what to watch here where I can see them! Also having only 1 tv somewhat limits how much they watch because they have to negotiate with each other, their sister and us.

[UnschoolnMa]

LOL I just had to giggle because we are watching Simpsons right now. Bart is such a turkey.

[Nankay]

Those who say they had unrestricted tv as kids...OK, I did too..BUT TV was a waayy different animal when I was a kid (70's) I mean it got as violent as 6 Million Dollar Man and Starsky and Hutch. The other day I turned on CSI (I think) and there was a mutilated woman corpse wrapped in packing tape who they found out freqented a sex club.
Now WHY would I want my 11 yr old to see that? That it waay different than watching Steve Austin throw someone across the room in slo-mo.

[pjlioness]

: :

...except that I didn't have unrestricted TV. We had one in the living room and one in my folks' bedroom. I didn't have a TV in my room unless I was home sick from school, and then it was the 6" B&W from my folks' room, or, after we finally got a color TV and VCR for the livingroom in 1984, I got that old B&W. When I was a Junior in HS in 1986, they finally let me have it (old livingroom B&W) in my room full-time, but I didn't watch it much, especially after I had to start whacking it on one side to get the tube to work. They still have that TV, and it still works after you whack it a few times.

I didn't really want to watch much that my folks didn't already. The Cosby Show, Murder She Wrote, some cartoons (esp. Bugs Bunny/Road Runner), The Dukes of Hazzard, Charlie's Angels, Love Boat, Fantasy Island, and Knight Rider were all family favorites, and a whole heck of a lot tamer that much of what's on TV today.

...and FTR, my folks *still* don't have cable, and may never get it, unless/until it becomes necessary to get the signal. The area I lived in didn't get cable until I was in 8th grade or so, and then only one of my friends had it. We did watch a few movies on it that our folks might not have let us - Still Smokin', Friday the 13th, and a few others of those types, but we were 13yo and older.

[aniT]

Originally Posted by Nankay

Those who say they had unrestricted tv as kids...OK, I did too..BUT TV was a waayy different animal when I was a kid (70's) I mean it got as violent as 6 Million Dollar Man and Starsky and Hutch. The other day I turned on CSI (I think) and there was a mutilated woman corpse wrapped in packing tape who they found out freqented a sex club.
Now WHY would I want my 11 yr old to see that? That it waay different than watching Steve Austin throw someone across the room in slo-mo.

Umm Seriously that is not true if you had cable. My parents would always come home from work and watch TV in their room so we could have the living room tv. I remember sitting at the edge of the living room so I could see down the hall with a remote in my hand. (you know, the old school ones that had a cord that attached to the cable box and you had to drag the cord across the room.) I would sit there and watch Porky's, Nighmare on Elm Street and all kinds of "other" shows I was not supposed to watch when was around 12/13. If I saw someone coming down the hall I would change the channel.

Maybe primetime TV was less violent, but not tv in general.

[UnschoolnMa]

Originally Posted by Nankay

Those who say they had unrestricted tv as kids...OK, I did too..BUT TV was a waayy different animal when I was a kid (70's) I mean it got as violent as 6 Million Dollar Man and Starsky and Hutch. The other day I turned on CSI (I think) and there was a mutilated woman corpse wrapped in packing tape who they found out freqented a sex club.
Now WHY would I want my 11 yr old to see that? That it waay different than watching Steve Austin throw someone across the room in slo-mo.

It's not really about me wanting an 11 year old to watch it. It's more about me respectfully and mindfully being involved when an 11 year old does want to watch it.

TV is different I will give you that. So is music, clothing, and special effects in film. It changes and evolves. We make a more realistic "dead body" these days no doubt lol. I'd be discussing those exact things with a kid and more.

[LilyGrace]

Originally Posted by Nankay

Those who say they had unrestricted tv as kids...OK, I did too..BUT TV was a waayy different animal when I was a kid (70's) I mean it got as violent as 6 Million Dollar Man and Starsky and Hutch. The other day I turned on CSI (I think) and there was a mutilated woman corpse wrapped in packing tape who they found out freqented a sex club.
Now WHY would I want my 11 yr old to see that? That it waay different than watching Steve Austin throw someone across the room in slo-mo.

We had You Can't Do That On Television! when I was a kid. Much worse than the Simpsons, imo. And that was a kids' show. In one episode they talk about hangovers, pass out nooses to the kids, have a firing squad, a drunk for a father, ideas on how to use the school for free babysitting and much more.
As for adult dramas, seeing the last episode of M*A*S*H and the twist at the end was pretty nasty.

TV is different, but so are our standards, I think.

[UnschoolnMa]

Originally Posted by aniT

I would sit there and watch Porky's, Nighmare on Elm Street and all kinds of "other" shows I was not supposed to watch when was around 12/13. If I saw someone coming down the hall I would change the channel.

Ha! I remember doing some of that too, especially with my cousins. We thought "Porky's" was a dirty movie. I must have been 11 or so.

I agree there's always been violence on TV. We just have new filming and technology techniques that allow us to make it look more realistic (thinking back to things like CSI, and etc.) Although sometimes I think the corpses on CSI look silly too. But My Dh watches old westerns and such and there is an awful lot of violence in those. And they were made back in the day.

[aniT]

Originally Posted by UnschoolnMa

Ha! I remember doing some of that too, especially with my cousins. We thought "Porky's" was a dirty movie. I must have been 11 or so.

I agree there's always been violence on TV. We just have new filming and technology techniques that allow us to make it look more realistic (thinking back to things like CSI, and etc.) Although sometimes I think the corpses on CSI look silly too. But My Dh watches old westerns and such and there is an awful lot of violence in those. And they were made back in the day.

Especially when you can see them breath.

[aniT]

Originally Posted by LilyGrace

We had You Can't Do That On Television! when I was a kid. Much worse than the Simpsons, imo. And that was a kids' show. In one episode they talk about hangovers, pass out nooses to the kids, have a firing squad, a drunk for a father, ideas on how to use the school for free babysitting and much more.
As for adult dramas, seeing the last episode of M*A*S*H and the twist at the end was pretty nasty.

TV is different, but so are our standards, I think.

Was that that show where they were always under some kind of play structure and someone always got slimed? They were always doing skits and stuff?

[UnschoolnMa]

Yep the sliming was on You Can't Do that... They still do the "sliming" thing on Nickolodian today actually. (My Dd saw them slime Justin Timberlake at the Teen Choice Awards last year ) Alanis Morrisette was actually on "You Can't Do That" all those years ago before her singing career.

[UUMom]

What was the nasty twist at the end of MASH? I never saw that...

And did Ross and Rachel ever get back together?

For little kids I do a cost to benefit thang in my head. I wouldn't say to my 8 yr old, "Well, if you really want to watch CSI, go ahead". I would probably say "I don't think you will benefit from having those images in your head. If I thought it would contribute to your growth or entertainment, I'd have no problem with it, but as it stands, I think it would offer you nothing but nightmares". She trusts me, and I know she wouldn't ask further. I think she trusts my judgement because she knows I trust hers.

Of course, this is why I am not an unschooler, although I do have massive unschooling tendancies, but this is a place I cannot comfortably go. I just don't see how something like horror or porn is helpful to a child, even if they ask for it. I figure, my dd will at least be able to identify her baggage when she is on the analysts couch. "I have some unresolved issues around my parents. They told me that CSI would not be helpful to my emotional growth when I was 8. They asked me to revisit the question in a couple of years? Then they can talk about it at $200/hr. Everyone needs some ghosts.

[UnschoolnMa]

Originally Posted by UUMom

What was the nasty twist at the end of MASH? I never saw that...

And did Ross and Rachel ever get back together?

Ross and Rachel did indeed hook back up, permanently we were left to believe. I was so stoked. That series ending with them split up would have sucked.

I think the M.A.S.H thing was that there was a scene where Hawkeye was telling a mom to quiet her crying baby because they were hiding from the enemy.

(Warning...some people find it really disturbing....)












She put her hand over the baby's face or mouth to hush it and it suffocated and died. Hawk was horrified, etc.

For little kids I do a cost to benefit thang in my head. I wouldn't say to my 8 yr old, "Well, if you really want to watch CSI, go ahead". I would probably say "I don't think you will benefit from having those images in your head. If I thought it would contribute to your growth or entertainment, I'd have no problem with it, but as it stands, I think it would offer you nothing but nightmares". She trusts me, and I know she wouldn't ask further. I think she trusts my judgement because she knows I trust hers.

Even if I wouldn't do it exactly the same way. I can see myself saying something similiar. "I am worried that the images you will see on the show will overwhelm or frighten you. Sometimes it's hard to get that kind of thing out of your head. Do you know what they show on CSI...what it's about? Can we talk about that before you watch it?"

I am not saying "no" but "here's what I am thinking. What do you think?".

[lab]

I wanted to chime in that I believe the mothers on this board take education seriously.

We read the latest studies on spanking, circumcision, breastfeeding etc.....


We know that spanking is not helpful and that breastfeeding is best.


Why oh why do we disagree on violent TV, movies and video games. Studies show that violent tv, movies and video games are not good for kids. Children are simply not able to process the images and adult situations. You can explain to kids all day long what rape is, but until they are mature enough to really get their head around it - they can't understand the violence of the act.

Kathymuggle - hold on tight!

You mentioned that you are loosening your rules. I think that is a good thing. Your ds is getting older and able to process more. Give him a later bedtime and do let him have a less restrictive viewing schedule. But for pete's sake, if you determine that CSI and Criminal Minds is inappropriate, then it is!

My ds is 13 now. I have struggled right along. He started watching Lost last year and really appreciated the decision.