What great mail to wake up to. First, I find out this week that my oil company screwed up again and hasn't been billing me right because of another one of their mistakes. So my $20 a month just have gas/oil for our hot water heater is a fluke. That is their service charge for just being a customer.
So the lady said I should be getting a bill soon for several hundred dollars to make up for it, and that they are sending out someone again today to see how the last person screwed up labeling our meter.
And then I get a bill in the mail from the hospital. Apparently medicaid has been denying my claims for all my OB appts, cardiologist, endocrinologist, u/s, MFM, everything since beginning of August. So you can imagine the bill I got. I called Allkids here (our medicaid) and they said there's no reason and they wouldn't deny me and the hospital screwed up, so I am praying right now that they freaking fix this.
If they don't, I don't know what I'm going to do. I have been spending literally hours every night not sleeping, trying to crunch numbers and figure out a way we can survive...and I can't fix it. We still always fall short. It's almost worth starting school again to get student loans deferred, but I would have to get more loans to stay in school and pay tuition for the school I want, and dh's college already started weeks ago, so I couldn't take classes there...
I think I'm going to have to knit some soakers and longies up to sell/trade for xmas presents and baby necessities. Other than dipes and mama pads when this co-op comes in and some clothes my MIL is bringing me this week, I have nothing. Hopefully I have enough yarn to knit up to trade and that will work, because it's the only way. And all my checks/debits are about to bounch, b/c dh only got one paycheck last month and it's catching up to us. I just don't know what the heck to do.
I think the worst thing is that when dd#1 was born, I was 17, a basically single mother, and I lived with my druggie mom. With ds, I was homeless some of the time, things were really bad, but I was still optimistic most of the time and really working on making a life for us. With dd#2, I got married to dh (a great man, no matter how much I complain about him), we had an awesome huge beautiful house on ~2 acres in a small town, he was teaching, money was tight, but life was good. And now we are in this huge, dangerous freaking city, I am afraid to go outside, we have no yard (I am very claustrophobic), the dog won't stop puking, I'm unexpectedly pg, we are completely unprepared living in what I can say is quite literally a slum and hell hole. It seems like we did so good, and now we are so screwed. Like a huge step back. We haven't been this broke and bad off for almost 5 years.
I got a call back from the newspaper asking if I still wanted to deliver. He said one just opened up in a safer neighborhood just east of here. I refuse to deliver here because it's unsafe. It's only ~$50 a week or month (unsure), but it's something that might help. Now I have to figure out how our insurance is going to freak out about that. It's already excruciatingly high since we moved here and due next month...
Sorry about the long ramble. Not so good of a mood.