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Have you ever....? link to original story, post 25 - Page 3

Poll Results: Have you ever forgotten your baby in the car, even for a minute?

  • 90% (147)
    No, never.
  • 2% (4)
    Started to walk away, didn't really forget.
  • 5% (9)
    Walked away, remembered while still close by
  • 1% (3)
    Completely spaced it, god I'm lucky to have avoided disaster!
163 Total Votes  
post #41 of 64
One time, I loaded up two kids and started backing down the driveway before I realized I'd left the brand new baby in his carseat by the front door... He was fine, but I was shaken. I plead sleep deprivation.
The same thing happened to me. #2 was a couple of weeks old and it was my first trip out of the house with just myself and the two kids. We were taking #1 to preschool. I was so proud of myself - everyone was fed, clean, dressed, shoes and coats on, and we were out the door. I buckled my oldest into her carseat, made sure she had her backpack and I had my purse and the diaper bag, buckled myself in and started backing down the driveway. Then I heard my daughter say "Bye Bye Baby!". I had left him sitting in his carseat on the sidewalk. That was my absolute worst mommy moment, and it is something that will haunt me for the rest of my life. And that turned out okay - he was fine, I was fine, everyone was fine - I can't even imagine how it would feel to have a bad moment like that and actually lose a child. The idea of it breaks my heart....

I have learned over the past few years not to use the word "never", because it often turns around and bites me in the butt.
post #42 of 64
post #43 of 64
When my middle dd was 6 months old we dh, dd#2 and I were meeting my mom and oldest dd at an ice cream stand. I had just found out that I needed to have surgery and the prospects were pretty scary. Dd#2 had fallen asleep in the back and we were so wrapped up in our conversation about what I had found out at the doctors that we both got out of the car, locked it and started to walk away. Then we realized dd#2 was in there. It was the longest 30 feet of my life DD on the other hand didn't even notice that we were gone!
post #44 of 64

I don't want to say "it'll never happen", but, right now, I think the likelihood of it happening is small since I never leave the car *w/o* DD (she doesn't go to daycare or a sitter or anything like that). So, it is very strange to NOT have a baby in the car w/me. But I can see how if the OPPOSITE is true (baby usually isn't in car, or in that car, or whatever) it could slip your mind.

That said, I did once drive home only to find that I hadn't buckled the bottom half of DD's harness...only the top part was done. Thinking back, she had thrown something onto the other side of the car and was screaming for it, and I went to get it for her, and just completely forgot to finish the snapping in...now I make it a point to double check the harness...so, obviously, I'm not infallible.

PS...both my husband and I were "forgotten" as children (not babies). My parents momentarily forgot me once in a store...but were back pretty much before they left the parking lot. My husband actually got left for a while...they'd driven all the way home before they realized they'd left him behind...
post #45 of 64
Not in the car, but in the house - I left without my baby! {i remembered before i got out of the driveway, but it was still scary}.
post #46 of 64
I discovered these recently and think that they should come standard on every single carseat:


I've never forgotten a child in the car, but can see how it could happen. Especially with an exhausted parent and/or a change in your regular morning routine, as is the case with so many of these tragic stories.
post #47 of 64
No way. I don't see how it happens.
post #48 of 64
When my Dd was a baby and toddler, I felt like she was a part of my body. I was always aware of her location and status, sort of like an arm or leg. I can't imagine forgetting her during that time.
post #49 of 64
post #50 of 64
Yes I have. My first outing with DS1 I completely forgot about him. I went with my aunt into her car ins place and only when I saw a picture of a baby on the man's desk did I remember. He had been out in the car for about 5 mins.
post #51 of 64
No, but I have anxiety issues about stuff like that, so it makes me hyper-aware. :
post #52 of 64
No, I've never forgotten my child was in the car, because I am always aware of this person with me as a presence. Although once or twice I had that feeling of awareness of my child with me, and then I would suddenly remember I had left her with my husband.

It is something I think my husband could possibly do if he weren't also hyperaware when he has the kids. But he is the kind of person who does things by rote. He says he has a little pattern, and if something interrupts his pattern, he forgets to do certain things. Like he'll forget to shave or even take a shower sometimes. I don't have patterns, every morning I think about what I have to do and do it or don't do it, but it's not routine. I guess that's why I always misplace my keys. Then I have to think about what I was doing when I last had my keys and re-enact a situation sometimes. I tend to try and remember everything instead of relying on routine, but now that I'm older I will admit it's harder.

In the past few years, I've completely spaced meetings that were rather important when I was feeling depressed or my mind was completely occupied elsewhere. I've also completely forgotten to turn off the hose to the pool, and I've flooded the yard a few times. And one time I forgot to turn the water off in the sink and flooded the house. And always there is this slight feeling of horror when it occurs to me, and I run to turn it off, hoping the whole time made a mistake and did turn it off, even though I know I haven't. I figure that it can be a lot like this for people who forget--they have a sudden memory that they left their child in the car, and they run back hoping to God they've made a mistake. It's got to be the worst feeling in the world.
post #53 of 64
Oh my gosh how sad I have never done that. Once when I only had one child with me instead of 3 I walked a couple steps away from the car before I remembered but I can't imagine actually forgetting!
post #54 of 64
I'm not bashing the mother, because honestly, I *do* see how such a terrible mistake could happen to someone. But, I'm just really surprised that in all those comings and goings from the car, her dd did not cry. That's a lot of hours not to eat.
post #55 of 64
My thought is that there has to be a piece missing from the story. One possibility is that she didn't actually go out of her way to show off the kid that morning, but to do something else that for some reason she doesn't feel she should share. It's really hard to believe that someone could go straight from "here's my wonderful kid, gotta love her!" to "lalala no kid in the car, off to work." And then not think of the kid getting in or out of the car all four times that day. Nope, there's something missing.
post #56 of 64
My ex and I did once. We were going to a prenatal class reunion when all the babies were around three months old. Everyone had brought something to eat, and we were getting the food tray, the diaper bag, stroller, etc. out of the car. We locked the car, walked to the front door (about 30 seconds away) and as we were opening the door, we both realized we'd left ds1 in the car. We were never out of sight of the car, but it freaked us both out that we had forgotten.

At that time, we didn't have a working vehicle, and had been getting around only on foot. We'd borrowed a car that day, and neither of us was used to the dynamic of having to unload everything - we were used to having it all "in arms" when we left the apartment. It was pretty scary.
post #57 of 64
I really wish I hadn't read that. Or "Mackenzee's Story" on the Baby Alert page, either. That one especially, because it is written from the point of view of the mother as she talks about the last time she nursed her DD before her DH took the girls for the morning (the oldest went to his mom's house, 10 mo never made it to daycare). :

I can completely understand how something like this could happen. I realize that I am fallible, and that it can happen to almost any of us, which is why I'm always super careful about my own kids. But I've still done things like driven off with my oldest DD unbuckled because she climbed up into her seat on her own, and I guess I just saw her in the seat and was thinking I already did it. And even though it probably never will happen to us because I always am so extra careful, I still don't let my guard down.

post #58 of 64
That's terrible! Even though my boys are at the age where I couldn't leave them if I wanted to, I was afraid of it when they were little. A girlfriend of mine told me to put a pacifier on my key ring everytime I got into the car with the kids, and take it off when we all made it home. Seeing the pacifier made me think "baby" every single time I took my keys out of the ignition, so I never could forget them. I never forgot them while we were out and about, but even if I had, I wouldn't make it far without them, cause I'd have to take my keys out of my purse and those baby keys would probably remind me.
post #59 of 64
There are always a few stories like this every year during the super hot weather. Breaks my heart every time. I really do think it's a tragic mistake, most of the time. It usually seems to happen when the normal routine isn't followed - dad takes baby to dc instead of mom, etc. Really, really sad.
post #60 of 64
No, never was my vote.

There was one time I was getting out of the car, talking to husband while he was smoking outside the car, before going into whatever place we had just arrived at, and I momentarily forgot she was in the car, because she was asleep and quiet, but we didn't actually walk away from the car or leave her in it.
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