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UPDATE - I am devastated

post #1 of 49
Thread Starter 
I am absolutely devastated. I use this word for a lack of words that can truly express how I feel. My best friend called me tonight and said “You’re going to hate me but I had him circumcised”. After months of emotionally investing countless time and energy into educating her and then in her 6 month hearing the sweet words “my baby will stay intact”, I never saw this coming. I am currently experiencing the 5 stages of grieving.

She took the baby to his one week check up today where the doctor told her that his foreskin was tight (even though he was having no problems urinating) and that if she didn’t circumcise him now that she would have to do it when he was older … blah, blah, blah.
Here she is a brand new mom, only wanting the best for her baby. Her fault was that she cannot think for herself and the doctor was very persuasive giving graphic details about the 2 year old she had to circ b/c the dad wouldn’t circ him at birth.

I am so angry right now that I can honestly say that I hate this doctor.

A few questions just keep rolling through my head:
Why am I this upset?
How can I educate the doctor?
Will we ever truly have the relationship we had before?
post #2 of 49
:

The ignorance of some doctors out there is appalling. It sounds like the doctor almost took advantage of the mommy's vulnerability as a new mom recovering from delivery and trying to do what she thinks is best for her son. The "tight foreskin" business is ridiculous, but perhaps in the haze of the pediatrician's graphic talk, the mommy just wasn't seeing it, in spite of everything you did to inform her. I'm so sorry. The situation makes me angry, too, and I don't even know this mommy.
post #3 of 49
How frustrating. I didn't even know that was something that docs check at 1 week, the tightness of foreskin. WTH. I am sorry mama.
post #4 of 49
I am so sorry. That doctor is a UA violation. It makes me so sick and angry.:
post #5 of 49
Did you by any chance tell her the dr was ignorent? I am so sorry for that baby.
post #6 of 49
wow. that is just terrible. money hungry doctors taking advantage of vulnerable new moms. disgusting.
post #7 of 49
I am so sad to hear this. It frustrates me to no end that to hear about this. the foreskin of a baby is supposed to be attached and not retractable from the glans, in order to protect it. This is not an abnormal condition but normal and healthy. It is likely the case here that this baby had absolutely nothing wrong with him and this was totally unnecessary. As long as he is urinating fine, there is really nothing to be concerned about. This is an example of the poor information that many doctors have, where they are unaware of the proper state and care of the normal human anatomy.
post #8 of 49
this is the 5th time i've heard about "tight" foreskin in a BABY.
It takes all i have not to SCREAM and say

"ITS F***ING SUPPOSED TO BE THAT WAY YOU MORONS!"

that poor sweet baby
post #9 of 49
poor sweet baby
post #10 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by cravenab00 View Post
this is the 5th time i've heard about "tight" foreskin in a BABY.
It takes all i have not to SCREAM and say

"ITS F***ING SUPPOSED TO BE THAT WAY YOU MORONS!"

that poor sweet baby
Yeah we've had a LOT of posts lately about the doctor "diagnosing" a tight foreskin on a baby. I mean, WTF you idiot doctors do you not know anatomy, what do they teach in Gross Anatomy class anyways??!!
post #11 of 49
thank goodness my good friend didn't RIC b/c there is a reaaaallly good chance that I couldn't be as close with her as I am now. She even asked me before the babe was born if I would still be friends if she chose to circ and I said that I wasn't so sure....I had to be honest with my feelings, and she had been around my babes, new all the info, etc.

I feel like I helped save her babe's foreskin and for that I am truly thankful.

I have no idea about this "tight foreskin" business...maybe it's a popular talking point docs are using being pushed by the skin harvesting industry..who knows?
post #12 of 49
I would make sure you tell her w/info to back it up that the doctor is a lying piece of . I am livid after reading this. That poor precious baby.
Maybe when the mom realizes the truth she'll sue his sorry ass.
post #13 of 49
Thread Starter 

Update

I called an anti-circ doctor friend this morning who works at the same hospital and found out that this doctor is very PRO-CIRC and is in it for the quick $ that AR Medicaid will pay her. I told my friend this and she has been sick all day. Apparently she uses the same scare tactic on every new mom who puts NO CIRC on the birthing plan.

I really wish I had the power to remove this DRs licencse.

:
post #14 of 49
Any way to contact Medicaid in that state? No insurance company wants to pay for unnecessary operations. I have the impression (I can't remember where I go it) that insurance companies keep track of doctors who pull crap like that - and take action.

Perhaps your doctor friend could help you write a letter to Medicaid.
post #15 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by nd_deadhead View Post
Any way to contact Medicaid in that state? No insurance company wants to pay for unnecessary operations. I have the impression (I can't remember where I go it) that insurance companies keep track of doctors who pull crap like that - and take action.

Perhaps your doctor friend could help you write a letter to Medicaid.
Yeah...isn't it medicaid fraud at the very least?
post #16 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Progressive_Mom View Post
I called an anti-circ doctor friend this morning who works at the same hospital and found out that this doctor is very PRO-CIRC and is in it for the quick $ that AR Medicaid will pay her. I told my friend this and she has been sick all day. Apparently she uses the same scare tactic on every new mom who puts NO CIRC on the birthing plan.

I really wish I had the power to remove this DRs licencse.

:
That is absolutely terrible I can't believe what some Dr .s will do in the name of having a fatter wallet! Maybe since your friend is so upset, she can persue some sort of action against the Dr. for lying. I guess you could never prove it, though. Poor, poor baby
post #17 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Progressive_Mom View Post
I called an anti-circ doctor friend this morning who works at the same hospital and found out that this doctor is very PRO-CIRC and is in it for the quick $ that AR Medicaid will pay her. I told my friend this and she has been sick all day. Apparently she uses the same scare tactic on every new mom who puts NO CIRC on the birthing plan.

I really wish I had the power to remove this DRs licencse.

:
Oh my freaking gosh! I just want to puke and physically hurt that doctor! How dare she do this! It should be grounds to lose her license. I am shaking I'm so upset. :Puke
post #18 of 49
Holy Crap malpractice for sure
post #19 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Benji'sMom View Post
what do they teach in Gross Anatomy class anyways??!!
It was just a few months ago that news went around about another new anatomy text book that depicted the penis as if humans were born mutilated.
post #20 of 49
Maybe you could get DOC to write this "MD" a letter on behalf of the mother and baby, similar to what they write for cases of forced retraction, stating that it is normal for the foreskin to be tight in a baby, and has no bearing on the possible need for later circumcision, and that she is giving medically incorrect information and could be liable for fraud... or whatever they feel is appropriate.

COntact John Geisheker, the legal counsel for DOC at:kiwijohn2@cs.com <kiwijohn2@cs.com>

Health professionals who are this misinformed and stoop this low deserve as much feedback as the involved parties can muster. They cannot be allowed to get away with things like this.

Gillian
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