Originally Posted by kathywiehl
Go right ahead if it makes you feel better
I don't tell my story as a way of self congratulating, I say it because I feel like it gives my opinion a little credibility and proves that no one ever has to surrender to an addiction that is harming their children. If I could quit, anyone can quit. It's a choice one makes every time one lights up that cig. I've been there. I know it's hard but you just suck it up and do it. I couldn't say anything if I'd not been through it myself.
I think it does give your opinion a little more credibility. It's difficult for non-smokers to relate to people who don't quit. I can understand it only to a certain point, kinda the way that men will never fully get pregnancy, yk? But, I've lived with smokers all my life and I know that there are different types of smokers out there. While my DH struggles with it everyday (he feels guilty b/c we're having a baby and he doesn't want to be a bad role model), my mom NEVER felt bad about it. Some people say, hey I'm addicted, what's it to you? Others really and truly feel helpless. IMO I think it boils down to your intentions. Have you decided to quit or are you more or less saying to yourself "it's too hard, I can't do it so I won't try"? It's okay to try and fail, it IS an addiction and addicts don't always succeed on the first try whether it be cigs or other drugs. But
, try again. It's selfish not to.
Kinda off but still on the subject and maybe too much info...
My older half sister has struggled with an addiction to crack for about the last 16 years (she's been off now for about 2 years, Hallelujah!). If you know ANYTHING whatsoever about crack you know that the addiction can make some people sell their own children just to get that next high. Much stronger than cigs. My sister has three children and I don't know what it was other than maternal instinct and protection but every single time she got pregnant, my sister gave up her addiction COLD TURKEY. She wasn't one of those people who had an occasional fix either. She was pretty far gone. My oldest neice is 16, and I have two nephews who are 13 and 6. Everytime she got pregnant, my family would be in an uproar b/c she's unmarried (although she's quite a bit older than me she just wasn't the most attentive parent) and strung out. Well, during her pregnancies she was a completely different person. Not one of her babies is a crack baby and I am so proud of her for that. Now, once she had the babies and got them into a routine, she went right back to her drug. My nephews actually suffered a bit with delayed speech b/c their mother would be sleep all day while she got over the night before. Eventually she kicked her addiction (hopefully forever!) but it's an uphill battle everyday for her.
The reason I say all this is to explain that although crack addition has a much higher consequence to babies, it is also a much harder drug to kick PERIOD, let alone cold turkey. If she can do it, I know that there isn't a smoker alive who can't do it once they let that maternal instinct kick in. I guess you actually have to focus on the fear of losing or damaging your baby in order to pull it out of yourself. Otherwise, I believe that you'll keep convincing yourself that one more cigarette won't matter. Then one more...then one more...etc.
Maybe I'm the one that's naive but that's how I've gotten through this pregnancy w/o drinking wine (which I love!!!!). Mind over matter really can work.