Cross posted in "Toddlers"
Normally I research things to the nth degree but since DD1 is on Miralax for constipation issues and since she still isn't potty trained I didn't look into pre-schools until after the summer started. I focused my efforts on a local "integrated" program out of the H.S. that I have heard really good things about. There is an entirely separate "regular" program, also run out of the H.S. but they only have one room and I was told that all of the slots were probably filled (which turned out to be the case).
I did call both programs but I only heard back from the "Integrated" program and was told to follow up at the end of the Summer for a screening. They screened her on Wednesday. They advised us they had a morning slot for her on Thursday and the Open House was on Friday.
She went Monday and Tuesday and seems to be enjoying it. In fact DH reports that she actually befriended a girl who was crying on the way in on the first day saying something like: "It's ok; don't be sad; it'll be fun". And DD1 was crying on the way out because she didn't want to leave. He also says that the teacher says she is adjusting well.
So, what's the problem? Problem 1: DH isn't happy with the morning slot since he has to get DD1 (3 years old) and DD2 (1 year old) out the door by 7:45 AM since it's a pretty big deal if you are late for "drop off". We knew that the morning slot was a possibility and if it were that important to him he wouldn't have been outside when I called to tell him she got in. When I finally got him on the phone late Thursday afternoon I explained she got a morning slot and that I'd asked if they could switch her and that I'd gotten the predictable, unenthusiastic "possibly/probably" with a strong hint of "we'd rather not" response. So I explained that if he wanted to request a change we should probably do it Thursday. He's now trying to take credit for being a team player and giving the morning routine the old college try.
Problem 2: DH is claiming that I didn't tell him this is an "Integrated" program. He does concede I explained that (aside from the greater likelihood of getting into this program because it has more classrooms) that I was focusing on this program since there is a higher teacher/student ratio. He also concedes I told him that she would be a "role model" student. While I have no specific recollection it's extremely likely that I would have further explained that the majority of the slots are for children with learning disabilities. To be honest I didn't give a lot of thought to what that might mean but, again, I had heard very good things about this program due to the more intensive program and the higher teacher/student ratio.
In comparison, the "regular" program is 2 days a week for 3 hours (rather than 4 for 2.5 hours) and in addition to the teachers there are High School students. It's probably an elective course for them. It gives them a chance to learn about child development while helping teach the pre-schoolers some basic art, writing, math, etc. I did speak with the head of this program very briefly after DD1 was accepted in the "integrated" program and while she is new to the "regular" program and the two programs are separate she seems to think that the "integrated" program is more "advanced".
What if anything should worry me about my DD1 --who has no particular issues herself-- going to school with kids her age that do have learning disabilities and other challenges, possibly including behavioral disorders? DH isn't specific but he seems to be alluding to the possibility that she may pick up some undesirable behavior. And last night he blurted out something about not wanting her to be "labelled".
While I appreciate his concern for her I actually saw this as an opportunity to try to breed some tolerance, compassion, patience, etc. in her. I realize that sounds kind of "pie in the sky" but on the other hand, those are all important qualities for getting along in life these days.
I did tell him we could take her out of the program and he told me that it's too late because she's enjoying it and adjusting well. He seems to want to switch her to afternoons in the hope that she would have the same teacher. But how much of an adjustment would everything else be? Ultimately I guess that simply means adjusting to a new group of kids, although some of the kids go for the whole day so if she had the same teacher some of the morning kids might be there in the afternoon.
I had hoped that the morning slot would work out because after school was over he'd have the rest of the day to accomplish anything else rather than having the entire day broken up 2 1/2 hours of pre-school.
As I'm writing this it seems like the only thing to do is give him the option of at least asking if they can make the switch since --aside from DD1-- he is the one most affected either way. Then we can both live with the consequences. Of course the first time he suggested the possiblity of a switch he asked me to make the call but I'm thinking he should be the one to do it.
Sorry this was so long but I would really appreciate any feedback, perhaps BTDT on the pros and cons of being a "role model" student in an integrated program. And on how to handle DH's disatisfaction with the morning slot.
Thanks, ~Cath
Normally I research things to the nth degree but since DD1 is on Miralax for constipation issues and since she still isn't potty trained I didn't look into pre-schools until after the summer started. I focused my efforts on a local "integrated" program out of the H.S. that I have heard really good things about. There is an entirely separate "regular" program, also run out of the H.S. but they only have one room and I was told that all of the slots were probably filled (which turned out to be the case).
I did call both programs but I only heard back from the "Integrated" program and was told to follow up at the end of the Summer for a screening. They screened her on Wednesday. They advised us they had a morning slot for her on Thursday and the Open House was on Friday.
She went Monday and Tuesday and seems to be enjoying it. In fact DH reports that she actually befriended a girl who was crying on the way in on the first day saying something like: "It's ok; don't be sad; it'll be fun". And DD1 was crying on the way out because she didn't want to leave. He also says that the teacher says she is adjusting well.
So, what's the problem? Problem 1: DH isn't happy with the morning slot since he has to get DD1 (3 years old) and DD2 (1 year old) out the door by 7:45 AM since it's a pretty big deal if you are late for "drop off". We knew that the morning slot was a possibility and if it were that important to him he wouldn't have been outside when I called to tell him she got in. When I finally got him on the phone late Thursday afternoon I explained she got a morning slot and that I'd asked if they could switch her and that I'd gotten the predictable, unenthusiastic "possibly/probably" with a strong hint of "we'd rather not" response. So I explained that if he wanted to request a change we should probably do it Thursday. He's now trying to take credit for being a team player and giving the morning routine the old college try.
Problem 2: DH is claiming that I didn't tell him this is an "Integrated" program. He does concede I explained that (aside from the greater likelihood of getting into this program because it has more classrooms) that I was focusing on this program since there is a higher teacher/student ratio. He also concedes I told him that she would be a "role model" student. While I have no specific recollection it's extremely likely that I would have further explained that the majority of the slots are for children with learning disabilities. To be honest I didn't give a lot of thought to what that might mean but, again, I had heard very good things about this program due to the more intensive program and the higher teacher/student ratio.
In comparison, the "regular" program is 2 days a week for 3 hours (rather than 4 for 2.5 hours) and in addition to the teachers there are High School students. It's probably an elective course for them. It gives them a chance to learn about child development while helping teach the pre-schoolers some basic art, writing, math, etc. I did speak with the head of this program very briefly after DD1 was accepted in the "integrated" program and while she is new to the "regular" program and the two programs are separate she seems to think that the "integrated" program is more "advanced".
What if anything should worry me about my DD1 --who has no particular issues herself-- going to school with kids her age that do have learning disabilities and other challenges, possibly including behavioral disorders? DH isn't specific but he seems to be alluding to the possibility that she may pick up some undesirable behavior. And last night he blurted out something about not wanting her to be "labelled".
While I appreciate his concern for her I actually saw this as an opportunity to try to breed some tolerance, compassion, patience, etc. in her. I realize that sounds kind of "pie in the sky" but on the other hand, those are all important qualities for getting along in life these days.
I did tell him we could take her out of the program and he told me that it's too late because she's enjoying it and adjusting well. He seems to want to switch her to afternoons in the hope that she would have the same teacher. But how much of an adjustment would everything else be? Ultimately I guess that simply means adjusting to a new group of kids, although some of the kids go for the whole day so if she had the same teacher some of the morning kids might be there in the afternoon.
I had hoped that the morning slot would work out because after school was over he'd have the rest of the day to accomplish anything else rather than having the entire day broken up 2 1/2 hours of pre-school.
As I'm writing this it seems like the only thing to do is give him the option of at least asking if they can make the switch since --aside from DD1-- he is the one most affected either way. Then we can both live with the consequences. Of course the first time he suggested the possiblity of a switch he asked me to make the call but I'm thinking he should be the one to do it.
Sorry this was so long but I would really appreciate any feedback, perhaps BTDT on the pros and cons of being a "role model" student in an integrated program. And on how to handle DH's disatisfaction with the morning slot.
Thanks, ~Cath
