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Midwives and Assistants: Who & How to Gift?  

post #1 of 14
9/14/07 at 6:09am
Thread Starter 
I'm not sure how to handle the MW gift thing. I see a practice of three MWs. Whoever is on call will come to my birth, and they will have two assistants that come as well. I have not met most of the assistants. They also said in many cases the back-up on call MW will come and act as an assistant since they're "up anyway." So how do I handle gifts? The same thing for all 3 people? Something "better" for the main MW and lesser for the two assistants? In which case when do I give it to them? At my house after the birth? Or bring it to the office at my 2w check up? And what about the other two MWs who don't attend the birth- I still saw them throughout the pregnancy, should I acknowledge them in some way too?
post #2 of 14
9/15/07 at 2:32pm
I gave my MW and her apprentice a gift at the 2 week check up. I gave our MW $150 and the apprentice less. I think the MW should get abetter gift because she does all of the prenatals, etc.
post #3 of 14
9/15/07 at 5:27pm
My midwife was in an office with 3 others. I saw all of them for prenatels so that we would know each other, so after the birth, I sent a huge vase of flowers to their office. It was still fresh when I went for my 6 week PP visit!!
post #4 of 14
9/16/07 at 5:30pm
Besides flowers what gifts have you given to your MW?
post #5 of 14
9/16/07 at 6:17pm
This time.....I gave my midwives a basket of hamdmade soaps from the local farmers market, as well as pens that say *midwives deliver miracles* and scratch pads that have a border that has the pluses of breastfeeding written around it.
Last time (same midwives) I gave them bottles of wine and massage gift certificates.
post #6 of 14
9/17/07 at 10:59pm
This is a personal thing, but I'd recommend against a bottle of wine. I'm not a drinker, so when I get a gift of a bottle of wine from a client I re-gift it to someone else.

Jennifer
post #7 of 14
9/17/07 at 11:16pm
I had a birth center birth last time where I saw several midwives. I sent a Harry & David basket to the practice with a thank-you letter.

This time, I'm not sure what I'm going to do for my midwife. Guess I'd better start thinking about it. ;D
post #8 of 14
9/18/07 at 10:22am
Quote:
Originally Posted by momtoS View Post
This time.....I gave my midwives a basket of hamdmade soaps from the local farmers market, as well as pens that say *midwives deliver miracles* and scratch pads that have a border that has the pluses of breastfeeding written around it.
Last time (same midwives) I gave them bottles of wine and massage gift certificates.
Can you share where you got the pens and scratch pads? That sounds like a wonderful gift for our midwives!

Thanks,
Amy
post #9 of 14
9/18/07 at 7:47pm
My mw with dd complimented one of my african violets while I was in labor (it's so funny to me that i remember that so vividly! ) and I promised her right then that I'd give her part of it, as it needed to be divided anyway.

So, I bought a nice pot, painted dd's name and birth stats on it, and put part of the violet in it as her gift. Gave it to her along with a card and picture.

Never did anything really for my mw with ds2 Not that I think gifting is something required or expected (um, we made all our payments promptly and had her paid in full at 36 weeks....that's more than she "expects" in many cases!), but I feel badly because I really wanted to give her something, and just never could come up with anything that really moved me, yk? And then too much time passed.....

Anyway, I'm with the same midwife this time, and I'd like to give her something, but once again I'm clueless. I am already taking her fresh baked bread when I go for my prenatal, but it would be nice to give her something that lasts.

I think if I were going to a practice like you are, I'd just take a gift for them all to share--like a big fruit basket or gourmet nuts, something like that. And then maybe a small gift for the main mw who ended up attending the birth, esp. if I felt a particular closeness to her. Or maybe find out what magazine subscriptions they have for the practice, and renew one for them.

I just don't think I'd try to get too personal with a practice, but that's just me.
post #10 of 14
9/20/07 at 2:54pm
Is this gift giving thing a homebirth tradition or did I miss something last time around? We're having a homebirth this time but had a freestanding birth center birth last time and I never heard of or even thought of giving a gift! Now I feel kind of bad!
post #11 of 14
9/20/07 at 5:13pm
It didn't even occur to me to give my midwife a gift. I paid her $3000.00! LOL.
post #12 of 14
9/20/07 at 6:10pm
Amy--I got the pens and scratch pads locally....PM and I can give you more details...they are really inexpensive.
post #13 of 14
9/20/07 at 8:55pm
I really wanted to get my MW something. She took a risk in me and I wanted to show her how deeply I appreciated that. I knitted her a hat. SHe had a favorite knit hat that accidently got washed and shrunk.. I heard about it and made her a similar one. She really seemed to like it. I knitted her assistant a nice scarf and her other assistant was a close friend of mine, I got her a mothering necklace (she was pregnant at the time)
post #14 of 14
9/21/07 at 11:16am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ladybyrd View Post
It didn't even occur to me to give my midwife a gift. I paid her $3000.00! LOL.
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