Confused about feelings toward DH

[CanidFL]

Hello,

My son is almost 2 weeks old and I'm feeling really confused about things. I love him to bits and I know my husband does but I'm feeling very lonely. I feel like as soon as my son came out my husband lost all interest in me. He doesn't hug me, kiss me, cuddle me or anything unless I ask and then it's like a chore. I don't know if I'm feeling jealous of my baby or what but it's getting hard to deal with. I cried for close to 3 hours yesterday. It's like we are just friends living in the same house raising a son together.

I feel like I gained a wonderful son and lost my wonderful husband.

I tried to talk to him about it yesterday and he says he doesn't want to be physical because he is really horny and doesn't want to be turned on when I can't have sex yet. He explained that he understands I can't right now and has no problem waiting till I am healed but that is his reason for not being "touchy" with me.

Is this normal? I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or imagining things. I just want my husband back. Maybe I am just grieving the loss of our single relationship....

[lynnie2183]

I wouldn't be too concerned yet about your husband's behavior, even though I totally understand how you must be feeling. Having your first baby together is such a huge change, everyone is overwhelmed, even your hubby. He might just be in his cave for a little bit. Maybe you could re-connect some other way than physically. Can you rent a movie to watch together that you will both like? Make or pick up a favorite meal? Share a glass of wine, play a game, go for a walk and hold hands? Its such an emotional time and your hormones are probably raging too. Try to take it slow and get used to your new family, its a role change for everyone. It really will all come back to you, the romance and the couplehood. You just have to keep putting forth the effort, but the first month or two are very crazy. Try to keep respecting each other and giving each other breaks so that no one gets resentful. We've all been where you are now!

[Kindermama]

Lynn had great advice....hugs mama! I've been there too. It obviously gets better because I have four

[shell024]

I teared up reading Lynn's post, because although I am in a different situation, Lynn's advice is spot on.

I can also imagine how you are feeling. I often feel rejected by my Dp, even if it is unintentional, and I think I do the same to him sometimes. Its hard. :