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Mother as "bm" or "birth/bio" mother, or, Why I don't come to this forum - Page 14

post #261 of 264
Quote:
Originally Posted by angilyn View Post
Stepmother to me is an ugly word with all its connotations of wicked witches and posion apples. Can we stop using that please.
Only if you can stop using the phrase "wicked witches"

Personally, though its been rehashed enough.. I found this conversation a good one and I'm thankful the OP brought it up because it has been something thats bothered me.
post #262 of 264
Quote:
Originally Posted by angilyn View Post
How many hours over two boards were spent on this one topic when we could have been supporting each other on things about our children?
Well, if some changed their minds or even came to a better understanding, I don't think it was wasted time. Support of one another can only improve after we take the time to understand what someone else is going through. Not everyone has that intrinsic understanding and sometimes it takes work and communicating to get there. I think that's okay. And i think this thread is a good example of how a potentially problematic topic can be hashed out and taken to that place of greater understanding when the participants don't give up in exasperation (despite being told we are beating a dead horse) and continue working through the issue. As a group, I think we are in a better place on this topic.

Happy New Year EveryMama! What a great way to end the year on this forum! Looking forward to another year of striving for understanding and using that understanding to support, help and heal.
post #263 of 264
Thank you, yoyo65! I think you expressed the whole thing very well. We spend too much time being "polite" and not enough time being truly compassionate. Communication is about clarity. I have also had problems with people here picking apart little details in my writing without giving me any help or listening to what was valid in my advice. I have found this true in all forums. I have also found some very nice people here who actually listen and offer help. I have 4 bio children all grown, one step son who is 13 and I am my husband's 4th wife! I have a lot to offer, too. Maybe we should pm each other as it seems we are on the same page as far as language.
post #264 of 264
Mamas, thank you for a wonderful discussion!!

I think that we have come to a point in this thread that all the points of view have been discussed. I believe it to be a valuable thread, so I will keep it around, but I'm going to lock it to further discussion.

Also, some posts have been removed, primarily for Violating this part of the User Agreement:

MDC serves an online community of parents, families, and parent, child and family advocates considering, learning, practicing, and advocating attachment parenting and natural family living. Our discussions concern the real world of mothering and are first and foremost, for support, information, and community. Mothering invites you to read and participate in the discussions. In doing so we ask that you agree to respect and uphold the integrity of this community. Through your direct or indirect participation here you agree to make a personal effort to maintain a comfortable and respectful atmosphere for our guests and members.


and:

Do not post in a disrespectful, defamatory, adversarial, baiting, harassing, offensive, insultingly sarcastic or otherwise improper manner, toward a member or other individual, including casting of suspicion upon a person, invasion of privacy, humiliation, demeaning criticism, name-calling, personal attack, or in any way which violates the law.

Again, thank you all for your participation in a great discussion.
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