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s/o: do you go to your child's school for lunch? - Page 2

post #21 of 30
Thread Starter 
Hmm. Interesting.

My initial reaction is to wonder how that works out parity wise, I mean there are probably going to be some kids whose parent(s) show up all the time for lunch, and then there will be the kids whose parent(s) never once come to lunch.

Wonder how that works out for the kids? Obviously, some parents will never be able to make it, due to work or other commitments. But do young children really understand why some parents can always be there while theirs are not?

Also curious if it adds at all to the pecking order amongst parents? Is it implied that one is a "better" mom if one shows up for lunch on a regular basis? Do other moms take note of who shows up and when? (My reading on MDC indicates yes!) Does it get competitive at your school? Do you feel differently about your child's peers and there parents based on what you see at lunch?
post #22 of 30
Quote:
Also curious if it adds at all to the pecking order amongst parents? Is it implied that one is a "better" mom if one shows up for lunch on a regular basis? Do other moms take note of who shows up and when? (My reading on MDC indicates yes!) Does it get competitive at your school? Do you feel differently about your child's peers and there parents based on what you see at lunch?
I never gave it a thought if other parents came and ate lunch or not. Actually I look to see other parents b/c then I don't feel out of place or that I am doing something unusual. I also don't think it is a competitive thing at all at my dd's school. And the kids in my dd's class, get excited just to see any parent, even if it is not theirs.
post #23 of 30
I've been thinking about what ChinaKat asked since yesterday and here are my thoughts. I think that lunch with students just gives parents another opportunity to interect with their children. I know parents who work odd schedules where they miss dinner with their kids but can come to the school for lunch. Or families where there is a new baby at home so one of the parents comes in for some special time with their child.

I certainly don't know and don't care which moms have lunch with their kids and which don't. Just cause I come in on a Tues, for example, does not mean Mom X was not there on Monday, ykwim? I really don't think that it plays a factor in any mom pecking order. At least at our school.

Regarding whether young children understand why some parents come and some don't. I dunno. I think that there are always going to be things that work for some families and not others. My DD often expresses her extreme dissappointment with being unable to attend Extended Day with her 2 best friends. Does she understand or care that I looked for years for a job where I could work at home and gave up other career opportunities so I could pick her up at school at 2:00? Nope. She just wants to play with her friends.

As far as competition between moms at school...over lunch, no...there are far too many other things to be competitive about. :

Sure, there are some moms (and dads) who volunteer at the school all the time. I really don't think that they are in a race to be the best mom though. Most of the moms who I know that volunteer often at the school feel lucky to be in the position where they can help out and want to give back by helping out. I try to not place judgement on others regarding volunteering at school because who am I to presume to know what is going on in someone else's life and schedule.

For me, I help out often not only because it is important to me to volunteer but also to fill up my days. We have been TTC for 3 yrs. I have one child. I need to keep busy or I will get depressed over not having a baby.
post #24 of 30
I go in sometimes and eat lunch with my kids. They like it, and i like chatting with them and their friends.
post #25 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by Milkymommy View Post

Sure, there are some moms (and dads) who volunteer at the school all the time. I really don't think that they are in a race to be the best mom though. Most of the moms who I know that volunteer often at the school feel lucky to be in the position where they can help out and want to give back by helping out. I try to not place judgement on others regarding volunteering at school because who am I to presume to know what is going on in someone else's life and schedule. .
Going a little OT here but I never judge other people for how much they volunteer or whether or not they do at all. I can and I enjoy it, so I do.
post #26 of 30
[QUOTE][Also curious if it adds at all to the pecking order amongst parents? Is it implied that one is a "better" mom if one shows up for lunch on a regular basis? Do other moms take note of who shows up and when? (My reading on MDC indicates yes!) Does it get competitive at your school? Do you feel differently about your child's peers and there parents based on what you see at lunch?/QUOTE]

Why yes! Of course the best moms are the moms who come to lunch. If you don't well

Seriously, a parent who goes in to lunch only knows if another parent happens to go in on the same day they do. Other parents could go in much more often or not at all - how would you know from the occasional lunch visit? I guess a student could feel bad that their parent doesn't get to come in, but I suspect it's so erractic that it isn't that big a deal. It's not like a class performance where all the parents are there except one (for this, a parent might want to find a neighbor, friend, babysitter, anyone to attend if you can not - cause that can be a pretty sad situation - even so, the other parents understand all about life and responsibilites and no one is judging "better than").
post #27 of 30
Wow, I have never heard of such a thing, being able to eat lunch with your child. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE that and I know my ds would too! I might have to mention that and see if ds's school would consider doing that!
post #28 of 30
The school my DS attends allows it, and I think it's great! I love going to eat lunch with him, and he is so happy when I show up. I enjoy getting to meet his friends, and during times when things are going bad for him, (for example, this past week was just a bad week for him, emotionally-wise) I can come give him a pick-me-up in the middle of the day.

In a cafeteria full of 140 kindergartners, I've seen an average of 3 other moms there on the days I attend. (I've been there a few times this year.)

I bring my 2.5 yo DD with me, and she LOVES eating at school with her brother!
post #29 of 30

Duplicate post

oops, I already posted
post #30 of 30
My mom came to have lunch with me occasionally when I was little. I loved it. I agree with the poster who said it makes kids feel like a celebrity. I plan on having lunch with my kids occasionally when they are in school.
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