Originally Posted by bryonyvaughn
I agree with Goatriffic's observation but disagree with the recommendation. I think the letter should go to the MW's credentialing board. The MW clearly was intentionally deceiving all her clients who visited her website as well as all those she spoke to about her babies being born at the BC. There's no reason whatsoever to assume this MW only behaved in unethical, unprofessional, deceitful, and illegal ways solely with this particular client. If we as consumers of midwifery services do nothing to stop such abusive actions toward women we are enabling the abusers and perpetuating the system that victimized us. I consider it our moral obligation to the community to speak out the alarm. If we do nothing in response I believe rather grimly we retroactively deserved the mistreatment we got.
This is interesting. I have spoken to a woman who said that 3 of her friends has bad experiences with this particular midwife. I will consider it, but if I do send a letter to her board, I will also send a letter to her telling her that I am doing so. I would also like to speak to the other mothers with bad experiences with her.
As one poster said about "sometimes we have colds" but the MW had a partner who had expressed a wish to come to our birth, and I had expressed that I preffered her. A laboring mother and a newborn baby are not places where you can justify having a cold. She is going to touch you internally (with gloves, but still) and she is going to touch and breathe on your new born baby WITHOUT gloves.
If my baby had gotten a cold from her I would have been livid. Absolutely raving with anger. She has a responsibility to my health and her partner was more than willing to come to my birth. Her ego was attatched to coming to my birth because it was on an Island that she used to live on, she wanted to say that she had done it, so she chose to come despite the fact that she has a partner for situations when she is too tired/sick or faced with an emergeny and cannot attend a birth with the health, attention and standard of care that she promised.
On the washington tribe there was a thred about finding a MW in Seattle, and that's how all this came up. There were several posters who had very good things to say about her, and thier babies were born 5-7 years ago. One woman had a birth that the MW had attended three days before mine and said that she mostly just stayed out of the way and that there "wasn't much for her to do". I resited the urge to ask this woman if she gave birth on a birthing stool, an had her waters broken, or is she was given any homeopathics to speed things up.
What you said about writing a letter to a higher authority is sticking in my head, mostly about how she violated the "midwifery model of care" that she was always touting around like a badge. How many women need to have bad experiences with MW's before they decide that an OB is just the same?
Midwifery in it's core is an amazing thing. It is recognizing the blessing of birth, the sacredness of the Mother and the miracle of a new life. In my opinion, if you start to adress it as a "job", much like painting a house, you are not being a good midwife, what women are looking for in a midwife. Someone responsible and caring, someone who has trust in you and who can direct things with a gentle hand if necissary.
Maybe it's a tall order, but I believe it can be done.
P.S, I understand that being a Midwife is work. It is your job, and you get tired. However, I believe it is a job (if you are doing it for a living) and I understand not being perfect, I also understand that personality is a factor as well.
Being a Mother is also work, it's a lot of toil, a lot of repitition, and you have to do it no matter what. However, like being a midwife, you know that when you go into it, and if you didn't, you find out soon enough.
However, if you hit your kids, or abuse them in some way, it's not a "bad fit", it's bad parenting. You did wrong, and you shoul make every effort not to do it again. And unlike being a Parent, you CAN stop being a Midwife if you find that you can no longer provide to people what they deserve.