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Pull and Pray??

post #1 of 80
Thread Starter 
I can't belive that I'm this old and asking this question.... but does this work?

My husband says it does, and I'm kind of new in this department.

I was on birth control (Nuva ring for the first few months of our marriage, but it made me fat and loony. (As in crying for no reason the week before my period). So I stopped.

So... since I can't ask my mom... I'm asking you mama's- Is this a bad idea?
post #2 of 80
It doesn't work.
As my sex ed teacher in college put it "some men dribble before they shoot."

Plus, it just seems like a really unpleasant way to end sex.
post #3 of 80
it always worked great for me















until last march
post #4 of 80
Granted, we weren't praying very hard but it doesn't work. Both our kiddos were conceived in that "practice before really trying" period; dh would be inside me for maybe a minute before pulling out and putting on a condom. (Sorry if TMI.) And we got pregnant really quickly both times.
post #5 of 80
Thread Starter 
The thing is, is that I don't think he's a dribbler..
I don't know... in the few months we've been married, we've tried so many things. First the ring, then condoms. I got a UTI while we were using condoms, and it hurt so bad that we are never using condoms again.

After that we just went to 'alternative fun' for a month or so, and now we do this.

Neither of us is ready to get pregnant... so I was actually coming here to find out about options.
post #6 of 80
What about the Pill?

the Today Sponge?

Diaphragm?

And, as I'm sure you know, sperm is microscopic, so if some are coming out in the pre-ejaculate you wouldn't be able to see them.
post #7 of 80
This chart is meant for teens, but it is a nice handy chart for fast facts of many options.

http://www.gurl.com/findout/guides/a...8892-2,00.html

Withdrawal alone?

Quote:
Description
The pull-out or withdrawal method is when a man pulls his penis out of the vagina before ejaculating.

Pros
It's always available, does not require supplies or hormones, and is free.

Cons
It requires great self-control, experience and trust, and it can be difficult for young men to know when to pull out. There is no protection against STDs with the pull-out method.

Effectiveness Against Pregnancy
85% with typical use, 98% with perfect use.
If you want to bump up the success of withdrawal and so you aren't at the mercy of your partner's skill in executing it, try pairing it with charting (www.tcoyf.com) to avoid your fertile times, a condom, having plan B handy (www.not-2-late.com, etc.

When you are def done with kids, DH can vasectomy if you guys want. It is less invasive than you having tubes tied.

A.
post #8 of 80
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by astrophe27 View Post
This chart is meant for teens, but it is a nice handy chart for fast facts of many options.

http://www.gurl.com/findout/guides/a...8892-2,00.html

Withdrawal alone?



If you want to bump up the success of withdrawal and so you aren't at the mercy of your partner's skill in executing it, try pairing it with charting (www.tcoyf.com) to avoid your fertile times, a condom, having plan B handy (www.not-2-late.com, etc.

When you are def done with kids, DH can vasectomy if you guys want. It is less invasive than you having tubes tied.

A.
Thanks for the chart! I'm 25, but I think it will be useful... And don't get me wrong, I really want to have kids, but I just don't think we are ready right now. We waited until we were married, but with all this worry, it's just not as fun as it should be, you know? I kind of miss just messing around!
post #9 of 80
have you considered charting?
post #10 of 80
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mothragirl View Post
have you considered charting?
that's actually what I came to this forum abt. I wouldn't mind doing the pull and pray (and that chart says that it works about 85-98% of the time), most of the time, and then just not doing anything for about a week or so. That would be foolproof enough, for me. If we absolutly couldnt get pregnant, than we just wouldnt have sex, which is what we did before we got married.

Sadly enought, I think DH knows more about how my body works than I do...

I was kind of dissapointed in the taking charge for your fertility site... Everything was pay! I'm going to google around for some free charting sites...
post #11 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by earthmama369 View Post
Granted, we weren't praying very hard but it doesn't work. Both our kiddos were conceived in that "practice before really trying" period; dh would be inside me for maybe a minute before pulling out and putting on a condom. (Sorry if TMI.) And we got pregnant really quickly both times.
:

"Oh God" is not a prayer, is it?

Go for this well-described method on "infertile" days only if you like surprises! It has worked for us so far but I was always kind of hoping I would prove DH wrong.
post #12 of 80
I learned to chart from the book The Art of Natural Family Planning. Some people use fertilityfriend.com. Lots of people have learned from Taking Charge of Your Fertility. You don't need to use pull and pray if you don't mind going a week or two w/out having sex.
post #13 of 80
It's worked for us for 2.5 years. (Maybe more, I am not counting our long distance time obviously, but we must have had more time together than that...) However we have never ever made a "mistake".

According to planned parenthood, there's only semen in pre-come if he has come recently, say in the last 24 hrs.

I second what PPs have said, that TCOYF is the book to read if you want to know more about your fertility cycle.
post #14 of 80
it can be effective, but if you screw up it isn't very forgiving

btw did the condoms you were using have spermicide? when I was using spermicidal condoms I got really wicked UTIs. after a few years of use I developed a bad allergy to the spermicide.
post #15 of 80
We tried it once. He'll be 4 in a couple months
post #16 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by aquarian View Post
I'm going to google around for some free charting sites...
www.fertilityfriend.com is free and designed for ttc, but you can use it to chart and to learn the basics.
post #17 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by texaspeach View Post
btw did the condoms you were using have spermicide? when I was using spermicidal condoms I got really wicked UTIs. after a few years of use I developed a bad allergy to the spermicide.
Ditto. I can't use anything with spermicide, but non-spermicidal condoms are fine. I also have problems with the artifical hormones... that's how we first ended up charting.
post #18 of 80
I know many friends with "dribbler" babies in their midst.
post #19 of 80
I would try condoms again, if I were you. There are all kinds and some can cause problems-- I am really sensitive (in a bad, nasty infection type of way) to latex, spermicide, and some lubricants. The only kind of condom I can use without paying for it a day or two later are the Durex Avanti condoms, which are polyurethane, no spermicide. Shop around and see what works... it's a painful process but once you figure it out, you're fine.
I have an IUD now which I love. No hormones, so no hormonal side affects, and your fertility is back as soon as you take it out. And it's good for up to 10 yrs.
post #20 of 80
It's worked perfectly for dh and I....for 3 yrs. and counting. BUT you have to know how and when! Dh has to know his body and have great control. When it does fail it is USUALLY USER error, NOT the METHOD that failed.

DD2 was a suprise, BUT again it was USER ERROR.

I definitely second trying to chart your temps and reading TCOYF.

I dont' do it because dd2 still wakes up SEVERAL times a night and is still nursing like crazy so it just isn't practical for me at the moment.

HTH!
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