thoughts on Theo sleeping (22m) and the new baby in 6 weeks

[Momma Aimee]

After he night weaned he was sleepng from like 8 or 8:30 till around 12, then tossing and turning, then sleeping till around 4:30 then waking up. then going back to sleep till 7 or so. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it was WONDERFUL. for teh first 19 month of his life he NEVER not even once, slept more than 3 hours at a time, ever. for the first 19 months, till he night weaned on his own, he woke up between once an hour and once every 2 hours to nurse. Then he hit 19 months i was pregant asnd he night weaned all on his own and i got sleep fo the first time in a looooong tiem.

He is currently working on 4 or 6 teeth. I am not sure how many teeth Theo has left. He is working on the last 4 front ones -- to fill in holes. they are whowing the white of the teeth about to break thought. he also has swelling back where i guess the 2 year molars are. he didn't teeth at all till like 13 months, so while it was a nice first year, it has made a a harder 2nd year. Just glad to get this final push -- surely this is all of them, riiight??? -- done before the birth. his sleep is really effected and he is more clingy and whiney. NOT what i need with a new born -- i am sure we will have enough of that cuz of the baby anyway.

well for the last week or maybe 2 he has been waking up every 2 hours all night again -- like when he was nurseing -- and askign for his sippy of milk.

-- do you think it is teeth realted (and now that his allergies are getting bad and he is coughing all night too, the congestion rattling in his chest ).... or have i really screwed up letting him have the sippy of milk at night -- so now he is gonna wake up all night to drink milk like he did wake up all night to nurse??????? I really NEED him to go back to waking up only twice over night, not every 90 minites to 2 hours, cuz I am not sure i can survive with him and the baby waking up that much.

Scott does no night time parenting, can't nurse, feels like Theo refuses him (and frankly Theo DOES refuse him cuz theo is 22 months old and for 22 month MOMMA has always been the one to respond to him, so tha tis what he expects -- my college educated hubby can't seem to get that), and Scott carries a gun too so there is a limit to how tired he can get, also Scott doesn't hear everythign I do and has more willingness to CIO ------- at least a little "to see if he goes back to sleep" at least with Theo now that i he is night weaned ------ which i consider out and out abuse, no matter what, and refuse to do. so over night are all ME.

What should i do -- take the sippy away? but i get thisrty at night, Scott and i both have a water bottle we can drink from if we wake up. so why would i assume Theo does NOT get thirsty too? should i geive it another week or two and see if the allergies and teeth get better and the sippy habit is still there -- or is that just feeding the habit for 2 more weeks to make ti harder to break?

also I have 6 weeks till my due date, adn Theo came two weeks early. ???? I am at a loss here, i need him to go back to sleeping like he did most of June and all of July and in to Aug after he night weaned himself. i am worried he is going to wake all night long for sippy like he did to nurse -- and the problem with that is he he wakes me up thrashing around looking for the sippy. worse after he has sippy he has to grab me -- two arms around my neck -- to go back to sleep -- and i am going to have a new born soon.

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Anything momma, anything???????????????

Aimee

[sorteep]

neither of my boys slept until they were 2 so I am not sure I am the best one to give advice!! support, yes, advice,, ummmm nothing worked for mine!.. one thing tho.. you might consider water in his sippy, if for no other reason, tooth decay...

it is prob his teeth, maybe a homeopathic teething remedy if you have not already tried.. or BAch's rescue Sleep (alcohol based but 1 spray is really negligible..)

hope you get some rest soon..

[renaissanceed]

If he is getting that many teeth, that is likely a big culprit in his changing sleep habits right now. DD also sleeps poorly when getting teeth and I get very frustrated but then when things simmer down a week later (since she tends to get one tooth at a time, it usually doesn't last that long), it doesn't seem as bad in retrospect.

But during the middle of the night - yeah, I hear ya, it totally sucks when they wake up all the time in pain. We haven't found much that works for teething here - just time and taking a deep breath (on my part).

As far as the sippy cup goes, I second the PP who suggested water. I've started to keep one with water in the bed, because I can often distract DD from nursing at night with the water. I don't think there's anything wrong with them drinking in the middle of the night, but water is better from the tooth decay perspective. I don't think having the sippy cup is contributing to Theo's night waking either, DD seems to find it comforting to know her water is there.

This too shall pass, this too shall pass (but in the meantime, feel free to vent here).

[Momma Aimee]

I just want it to pass before the baby --- : : :

I find day by day i am getting really freaked about the reality of the two of them, with theo soooooooooooooooooooooo little

: : : :

(do we have a smilie for TERRIFIED)

I will try water, and heck, if nothing else he might not wake up as much for the water???? But i DO think he is waking up NOW from pain and general discomfort (or from momma moving due her general discomfort) and useing the sippy to slef sooth -- which i am cool with, as long as he doesn't start to wake up for the sippy as he used to wake for the boob. YK??

Aimee

[GinaRae]

With all the teeth coming, you want him to get out of the habit of drinking all night anyway, I think.

One thing is to SLOWLY wean milk to water by adding more water to the cup - more and more, each night - until its all water. Then maybe a spill proof sippy so if he does wake, he can grab his own water and let you sleep. ????

[renaissanceed]

Also, just so you can see some light at the end of the tunnel, in the coming months as Theo hopefully gets more verbal, he might be able to tell you what he wants when he wakes up at night.

DD now asks for "water", "boob" or "cuddle bear" when she wakes up and usually passes out within a minute of being given what she wants. I find it much easier than trying to guess. And since she goes back down so easily, I can usually fall asleep more easily too, since I haven't had to wake up completely, and get into full on panic mode about how I am going to get this kid to go back to sleep.

And if it is just teething, I think he probably will go back to sleeping better once his teeth are in - I'm hoping so for you.

[StacieM]

I'm hoping for you that it's just a phase. My son went through a time just before age 2 when he was waking up every night and NOTHING seemed to soothe him. Not being carried, not drinking milk, nothing. I would stay up with him for over an hour until he calmed back down. Sometimes DH would help, but since he had to get up at 4:45 every morning I didn't really want him to miss out on sleep if he didn't need to. Funny thing is, him getting up and taking my son calmed him down the fastest. He didn't calm down because he was with DH, he calmed down because he wanted to come back to me, but DH would tell him he needed to stop crying first and say please and tell me sorry.

Anyway - I don't know what caused it, I was just glad when things went back to normal. But if Theo's getting a bunch of teeth that could very well be what the problem is. As young as he is, you may be surprised at how much he understands when baby comes. My second dd was 19 mo when my youngest dd was born and it's like she knew baby needed me and she started doing more on her own, not being as clingy and such. Not that she didn't have my attention, just not as "hands on" all the time. Of course, she did get grouchy some days, but I think almost all youngest kids get a little more "difficult" right after their new baby brother or sister arrives. It's a transition for everyone. I hope yours is not as bad as your worrying it will be.

[kathteach]

Hey Aimee,

If you get a chance check out my thread in Nightime Parenting. I got lots of good advice that might apply to you and Theo too. Try not to stress too much Mama that's all I can say. I am trying not to and I am telling myself it will all work out. It has to!

[marisa]

I think it definitely has to do with how he's feeling. It's hard to sleep with congestion and achey jaws. Have you tried one night to give him some infant pain reliever to see if he sleeps better?

I am almost positive it will pass before baby gets here.

[Momma Aimee]

things do seem better.

we got him on a 24 hour allergry medication. takes it int eh am ... but there is less noise in his chest now.

i took the milk and gave him water sippy instead -- a very POed little boy the first night, but he is drinking less at night. still drinking though, so i know so of it must be real thirst.

we are down to one or tow wakings a night.

DH is going to try sleeping with him in his bed -- buttttttttttttttttttt i know DS will have a hard transition after 22 month of cuddleing with momma .... how bad do i let it get? I am worried DS will just cry and cry and cry and cary -- welll at some pont we all have to get some sleep, but if i give in and go get him, or join them, am i teaching him to cry long enough and get momma -- then what good does that do when momma CAN"T come cuz of the baby ?????? Dh is gonna be pissy too -- he seems to think DS should "logically get" that daddy is as good as momma and so on ...... : : AND then when DS cries and cries with HIM he cites my own oppostion to CIO back to me -- "well he is crying either way, me beiung here dosn't matter" ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I am NOT looking forward to this transtion.

the odd thing is -- at least one, if not both wakings, are still crying and crying and nothing seems to help for a while -- not water, not momma, not anything ????? I jsut don't quite get it, yk?

[marisa]

Glad to hear things are improving!

When Geneva nightwakes and nothing helps her, it's usually:
A scary dream
Her leg fell asleep because she was all curled up
She's cold and needs the blanket
She is some kind of pain or discomfort

[crystalalene]

Aimee,
I am right there with you. When my supply dropped, she night weaned on her own, and I thought she might even wean altogether.

Then, the MW jinxed us and told us that she would regress.

They just *know* somehow that this is their last few weeks of having you all to themselves.

My DH is very similar. He tries, but then he gets frustrated, too, and she asks for mommy and in I go. I have been sleeping in her bed just because I am too tired and big to go switching back and forth.

And she wants to be in her bed (we had been sleeping all together on our king until about three weeks ago).

I am tired, we are all tired, and the crying isn't stopping... She's still nursing but it isn't quite as magical as it used to be. And for us, it isn't teeth or sickness or allergies so I think it is just regression, unfortunately.

And until there is a real baby in the other room needing mommy, they just don't get why we can't be there, as we have been for their whole lives thus far. I understand, really all too well, where you're coming from.

The only thing I can figure is that I would be tired anyway, I'll just be more tired after the baby comes, and until then she just can't understand why my boobs aren't making milk, and I can't rock her for hours on end, and I can't carry her to her bed, etc.

[Momma Aimee]

They just *know* somehow that this is their last few weeks of having you all to themselves.

I really really really really wonder about this

Theo has NEVER been clingy -- never -- now he is ALL OVER ME all the time, and while he has always slept by me he USED to sleep there, now he has to have both arms around my neck, my face shoved hard into him body, his hands clinging my hair and i can't move .......

??????????

[pishajane]

Just wanted you to know I share your pain! I'm due to give birth in 9 wks, and dd will only be 17mo. She's still nursing every 1-2hrs at night, so i have absolutely no idea how i'm going to handle both her and a newborn wanting a boob all night long. Did you find that smilie for terrified?? I was hoping she'd sleep a little better before the baby was born, but i've given up on that idea and resigned myself to being completely exhausted. As for when i've got them both wanting me... well i guess i'll just deal with it.
Oh, and teething will definitely keep dd up more at night - she turns into an all-nite boobaholic when she's teething!
I hope your ds gets better soon, and you get some well-deserved rest before your birth.