oy, this iskilling me

[mommymarliah]

My sister is due in 4 weeks with a son. I have tried time and time again to talk to her about not circing and she will not hear any of it. Her only reason for doing this is she "thinks uncirced men are gross" so therefor her son will be cut when he is born.

I have tried every thing I can think of, sent her the popular articles, video links, you name it I tried it. I told her I think its sick she would mutilate her son based on her own sexual preferences. But she just doesn't care.

Makes me want to vomit. Its really sick how set she is on this for no other reason than she likes the look of a cut penis.

I feel sick for my poor nephew and theres nothing I can do. Its so frustrating.

[Papai]

So does she have a problem with your "gross" boys?

[Mommiska]

I am so sorry - that sucks. I don't know what I would do if I had a sibling like that...it would kill me. I really feel for you.

Do you live close enough that you could sit down with her and make her watch a video about it? Or could you send her here?

Her poor son. Have you thought about asking her what she'd think of a man who wanted to cut up his daughter because he liked the look of cut labia?

[phdmama06]

It must be frustrating to deal with someone so stubborn, especially when she is giving the reason that "uncirc'ed men are gross." I'm so sorry that this is happening and I feel bad for her little guy.

[Bm31]

Does she find her own intact genitals gross??

[SammyJr]

Have you asked bluntly, "Why are you pushing YOUR sexual preferences on your baby? I can't believe that you don't find that creepy!" ?

[tuansprincess]

argh! That reasoning is so backwards and disturbing.

Perhaps if she saw these guys, she wouldn't think intact is gross.

Good luck - I'm so sorry someone close to you is being so ignorant.

[cherri0196]

1st off im sorry about this :-( im sure its hard since its family. but dont give up keep fighting the good fight.

As for the gross thing...has she seen a newly circ'ed little boy?? now THATS gross. a bloody, Pusey, stump of a penis is not a pretty sight, and even after it heals its still gross, the head is all purple and the skin is all bunched up under the head....it literally looks like the cut skin is strangling the head of the penis, gross, gross, gross.

[hakunangovi]

Have you sent her the article from "Men's Health" magazine entitled "Separated at birth". See it at www.noharmm.org/separated.htm

Could knowing that she is compromising her son's sex life for ever have any influence over her decision ??

[mommymarliah]

I have sent her article after article, she refuses to listen to any reason. Shes this way about alot of things though. She doesn't breastfeed at all, not even the colostrum because she just "doesn't want to"

Its just so frustrating, especially when I have 3 intact boys and a brother and husband who wish they were never circed! I have yet to talk to a circed man who is happy with what was done. And it just makes me sick for my little nephew.

I babysat a boy yesterday that was circed which just made me sick about this all over again

[mamasophy]

: I don't know what to tell you. That is so alien to how I think that I don't know if I'd be able to maintain a relationship with them, but then again, it's your sister. There's nothing written that we have to like our siblings, but I'd be mourning the loss of a relationship in this situation because I just wouldn't be able to be around them you know? But that's me - I need to feel some sort of connection, like-mindedness on some level to feel really close to someone, and anyone who thinks like you say she's thinking (and saying) - well, that cuts the connection for me. But you may be different, have thicker skin than me, and be able to have a relationship. If so, you're a "better man than I"! I just couldn't read without offering a
I hope you can through to her and if you can't, that you can feel OK about it. I love you for trying! And I hope you keep coming here to get lots more love and support!

[mommymarliah]

Originally Posted by mamasophy

: I don't know what to tell you. That is so alien to how I think that I don't know if I'd be able to maintain a relationship with them, but then again, it's your sister. There's nothing written that we have to like our siblings, but I'd be mourning the loss of a relationship in this situation because I just wouldn't be able to be around them you know? But that's me - I need to feel some sort of connection, like-mindedness on some level to feel really close to someone, and anyone who thinks like you say she's thinking (and saying) - well, that cuts the connection for me. But you may be different, have thicker skin than me, and be able to have a relationship. If so, you're a "better man than I"! I just couldn't read without offering a
I hope you can through to her and if you can't, that you can feel OK about it. I love you for trying! And I hope you keep coming here to get lots more love and support!

Thanks I needed those hugs. I have only recently started talking to her again (and of course she brings up the fact in casual conversation about how different we are and how she is going to have her son circed, I had no desire to dicuss it yet again)....at this point I'm ready to bring it to an abrupt end again. I really can't stomach the choices she makes.....only months ago she was threatening to abort this child. And even now the real father has no idea she is carrying his child. She is marrying someone who is not the dad and telling everyone he is....its just a huge mess. And she has no care for anyone but herself. This is just the proof I needed to prove she hasn't changed at all. Its really sickening to me I'm not cut out for that kind of stuff. It just infuriates me. The poor baby, it makes me so, so sad for him.

Anyway, thank you for your support.

[Microsoap]

Not at all to make light of your sister's messy situation, but I watch these kind of these events everyday on 'Maury' (Maury Povich's daytime talk show) and when they flash the backstage image of the boy (s) whose paternity is in question, wonder if they had his circumcised. For some reason, in my mind I tell myself no matter how bad things are w/ the multiple men in her life, she did some research and left him intact. One mother even said she had her son circumcised and "it" (the penis) was already so small beforehand and therefore he MUST be the one guy's son. And something about paying for it (?). :

It's horrendous she's making a choice that will permanently mutilate an innocent human being against his will and rob him of his choice, a sexual assault of the worst kind. I commend you deeply for going to such lengths to get a person to see logic.

[mommymarliah]

Originally Posted by Microsoap

Not at all to make light of your sister's messy situation, but I watch these kind of these events everyday on 'Maury' (Maury Povich's daytime talk show) and when they flash the backstage image of the boy (s) whose paternity is in question, wonder if they had his circumcised. For some reason, in my mind I tell myself no matter how bad things are w/ the multiple men in her life, she did some research and left him intact. One mother even said she had her son circumcised and "it" (the penis) was already so small beforehand and therefore he MUST be the one guy's son. And something about paying for it (?). :

It's horrendous she's making a choice that will permanently mutilate an innocent human being against his will and rob him of his choice, a sexual assault of the worst kind. I commend you deeply for going to such lengths to get a person to see logic.

yeah I know, this choice bothers me more than anything else she has done because it involves physically harming her child (well that an the abortion threat which also would have harmed him, but at this point I realize she was just bs'ing everyone anyway).... this just seems so much worse than the other stuff, makes me so sad

[mamasophy]

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this sweetie. Here's another