Help, recommend to me some good affirmative websites (homebirth)

[waiting4it2snow]

I am panicking. I don't even know why. I've been through this before. I think I am just tired. It's a busy time of year, trying to get my two oldest set up for our school year, making sure I have everything I need for the birth and new baby, thinking about fall weather and clothes for the other kids, dealing with my busy, happy just about two-year-old (still nursing too). Cleaning everything in site. Birthday coming up, a out-of-town relative deciding he wants to visit for the weekend (of my due date!!) and stay with us!!! (even though he knows we are having a homebirth??). I am sore everywhere, my lower back, sciatic nerve, pinched neck, having contractions, esp. when ds nurses, can't hardly crawl out of bed to pee without my legs giving out on me when I walk down the hall. Seriously trying to get the whole house organized so that the things my ds gets into now will not be able to be accessed by him once I am busy with an infant... and I feel like I am living in a freaking furnace all day long.

So on top of all that, I keep getting flashes of panick. My thoughts are along the lines of: "OMG, I'm crazy I can't believe I am doing this again. I can't believe I am going to have to go through labor again. I don't know how I did it with Alex (he was my first natural birth). What if I am in hard labor for hours and hours? How am I going to get this baby out, I'm so tired and sore already right now? WHEN am I going to go into labor? Is our house guest going to be here, trying to use the bathroom while I am in the living room naked and groaning? What are we going to do with Alex if I go into labor in the middle of the night and he doesn't like the assistant that's coming - and what if she doesn't show up?"

I have contingency plans for everything, I'm sure it will be fine with my other children, our houseguest, etc. I know why I am having a homebirth, I know why I want a natural childbirth. I have two very negative hospital experiences even which I can contrast to a very positive natural homebirth, an amazing experience... but it's like my thoughts are irrational and racing and I really feel I need to replace them with more positive information about natural birth and labor than what I am generating to combat these panicky moments.

Does anyone else feel overwhelmed at this point?

[candyapplez]

i'm feeling overwhelmed too, i am going to reread the baby catcher and fill myself with good thoughts.

[Briannasmom]

Molly - hugs to you!! You are just a very busy, very pregnant mama! It's so normal to feel anxiety about your upcoming birth! Sounds like you just need to talk to someone who can tell you that You can do this! your birth will be great!
Do you have a midwife or other birth support person to talk to?? (or are you going UC?) I talked with my midwife a bunch when pregnant with my second - processing the complications that I experienced after delivering my first. Her calm and loving demeanor really helped me through it. Plus - I read a whole bunch of positive birth stories to remind me it was easy and doable! I love Ina May's Spiritual Midwifery - full of a whole bunch of great birth stories.

Remember that all labors are different - this one could be really quick and easy! I don't know if you believe in the power of intent - but I do..I really held that intent and talked to my little one inside me..and it did turn out to be a really easy beautiful birth.

I don't have a website full of good stories other than Mothering here, but I do have a positive birth story of my own...I posted it on my blog (www.consciousparent.org) (click on homebirth!)

You're going to have a great birth, my friend!

Warmly,
Katherine