I am so frustrated.

[transformed]

My ds is annoying me so much latley! He argues with everything I say! He has taken a liking to namecalling-and I really dont like it. He has also picked up the art of "talking smack" in recent weeks.

Also, anything I talk to his sister about-like "dd would you like a sippy cup?" and she says "Yes" my ds needs to interject and tell me that she actually doesnt want a sippy cup. I want to smack him! But I havent....I havent done anything about it and I think its unacceptable-because there is never a time when he doesnt interject and tell me she wants the other thing, or she doesnt want something. (Am I making any sense?):

Doubly annoying is that everything he does his 21 month old sister copys and I am having issues with her with other stuff too. Like tantrums....and throwing things at people with the intention of hitting them. Also she likes to pick up items and throw them to show her frustration.

This was either going in personal growth or here! LOL

I decided on here for some parenting suggestions.

I am so freaking frustrated!

Jenny

[WuWei]

Could you create a fun diversion to all the pent up energy? Something like going to the park and feed the ducks? Something that is fun together and connecting, which doesn't have the "cabin fever" affect of self-generated ways to get a reaction due to boredom?

I find that just changing the scenery, shifts our energy toward working together, rather than butting heads in an enclosed area. Even doing something fun and dramatic like a water balloon toss, or make an obstacle course, or go dig for worms, or build a campfire, or roast marshmallows over the stove, or a bubble bath in the middle of the day with candles and music, or make healthy cookies, or anything out-of-the-ordinary!

Have Fun Together!!

HTH, Pat

[transformed]

we just went on vacation for a week and he acted like this the whole entire time. We were doing nothing BUT playing with him at the beach, and in the pool, and outside, and just fun fun fun...

I dont think its about being bored.

And also, I am 7 months pregnant, and getting tired really easily, so I definatly can't be out and about as much as I normally would like to be.

[PreggieUBA2C]

Transformed, I just had to share this with you. I don't know how old your son is, but our boys took to name-calling a while ago and it was a bit startling to me since all of our name-calling is affectionate here. This is easy for me because this is how the typical conversation goes:

Ds1: You're a TOMATO, mummie! (with angry pout)
Me: I'm a tomato?
Ds1: YES! And you have WET hair!
Me (obviously offended... ): Oh. Thank you for telling me, sweetie. Can we talk about [the issue] now then?
Ds1: ...yes... (or ...no...)

Their 'names' are so atypical that I have a hard time not laughing most of the time and they usually, if not always, lend themselves to some sort of playful parenting response (I'm a 'HARD CHAIR!' So, I immediately make myself into a chair shape and ask them, "Like this?" which usually calms them and helps them to enjoy the humour as well). I only hope that this phase is dealt with while they still use such hilarious names because I guess I don't know what I'd do if the names were actually hurtful.

How old is your ds? Contrariness can be completely developmentally appropriate if your ds is exploring the 'other side' of all the positive assertions you've been living until now. I think most children do go through a stage like this, and yes, it's annoying sometimes.

When ds is just saying 'no' or being contrary without there being any reasonable cause, I just ask him a lot of directed questions so that even if he sticks to his 'no' he's at least gone through the process of thinking it through and making an informed decision, since I assume that's what he's trying out anyway.

Other times, the process of working through his initial response brings him to change his mind. Usually there's a way to work with his decision either way, so the process is what's most important to me. I want my dc to feel confident in their ability to discern whether 'yes' or 'no' is the most beneficial response to any situation, and I'm (trying to be ) happy that they practice with mundane decisions rather than later when their decisions carry more weight than whether or not they want to take their tyrannosaurus to the park with them this afternoon.

[transformed]

3 Boys has given you alot of wisdom, I can tell!!

I think his "smack talking..." (I think thats what I would call it) is kind of a "boy" thing. Whenever I see movies about boys who are 10ish years old, they are always cussing and trying to look at pinup girls and just doing "boy" stuff like that.....spitting....peeing outside.....Boy stuff. Mabye I should watch more "boy" movies just to put it in perspective. (Like Goonies! LOL)

I am trying soooooo hard to keep it in that perspective but I feel attacked sometimes... (whether or not its rediculous is besides the point...I feel attacked!) I feel attacked alot...especially having a very passionate 2 yr old. She hits me, pinches me, throws stuff at me.....ugh....I think I'll send her to boarding school till she is 4. :

I am in serious need of reading the book Playful Parenting because I really suck at it! (Call it-job research )

I am a lazy lazy mama-mentally. I dont know what to say to them alot of times and I dont want to know what to say! I have learned I need to be "becoming" a good mama, and its not going to happen overnight.

Omega 3's are gonna help my brain I know it!

Originally Posted by PreggieUBA2C

Transformed, I just had to share this with you. I don't know how old your son is, but our boys took to name-calling a while ago and it was a bit startling to me since all of our name-calling is affectionate here. This is easy for me because this is how the typical conversation goes:

Ds1: You're a TOMATO, mummie! (with angry pout)
Me: I'm a tomato?
Ds1: YES! And you have WET hair!
Me (obviously offended... ): Oh. Thank you for telling me, sweetie. Can we talk about [the issue] now then?
Ds1: ...yes... (or ...no...)

Their 'names' are so atypical that I have a hard time not laughing most of the time and they usually, if not always, lend themselves to some sort of playful parenting response (I'm a 'HARD CHAIR!' So, I immediately make myself into a chair shape and ask them, "Like this?" which usually calms them and helps them to enjoy the humour as well). I only hope that this phase is dealt with while they still use such hilarious names because I guess I don't know what I'd do if the names were actually hurtful.

How old is your ds? Contrariness can be completely developmentally appropriate if your ds is exploring the 'other side' of all the positive assertions you've been living until now. I think most children do go through a stage like this, and yes, it's annoying sometimes.

When ds is just saying 'no' or being contrary without there being any reasonable cause, I just ask him a lot of directed questions so that even if he sticks to his 'no' he's at least gone through the process of thinking it through and making an informed decision, since I assume that's what he's trying out anyway.

Other times, the process of working through his initial response brings him to change his mind. Usually there's a way to work with his decision either way, so the process is what's most important to me. I want my dc to feel confident in their ability to discern whether 'yes' or 'no' is the most beneficial response to any situation, and I'm (trying to be ) happy that they practice with mundane decisions rather than later when their decisions carry more weight than whether or not they want to take their tyrannosaurus to the park with them this afternoon.