Telling dual care OB about HB after the fact? - Page 2

[MarineWife]

CPS came and went. I was told there are absolutely no concerns with my home or my children and this whole thing should be wrapped up in about a week, the time it takes to finish the paperwork. Whew! The lady told me several times that I did not do anything wrong by having my baby at home.

[Gr8ful Momma]

glad to hear that you had a positive outcome with CPS MW. Congrats to you and your family on your new son.

[mom2tillie]

To the original poster, I am only 20 weeks into this pregnancy but I am also recieving dual care. I really like my OB, he isn't the one that cut me unnecessarily, it was his backup - backup. He doesn't do VBACs due to hospital regulations so he is transferring me to some affiliates in the nearest city toward the end of my pregnancy. My midwife is awesome. I really like her and so does my hubby. She is going to teach him how to "catch"... very exciting. Anyway, it is illegal here for her to do a VBAC unless it is an accident. So it is going to be. I have no plans to tell me OB or his associates about this until after the fact. At which time I will say "it all happened so fast" (in my dreams, right?) ... I like my OB and plan to see him again for subsequent pregnancies and I still don't think I need to tell him. I really don't think I would say anything about it to your OB especially given that you don't plan to see him anymore after this.

Where it gets hairy is when/if you go overdue and they start scheduling interventions. I will just adamantly refuse and if they drop me because I am being "difficult" well, that makes it all that much easier.

Can't wait to hear your success....
-Iris

[mrskennedy]

IME telling OBs about homebirth just starts fights and lectures. So I would never tell again. You can be proud of your HB without your OBs knowledge. It's also none of their business where/how/with whom you give birth. So in that light, if you wanted to tell, it's ok. But be prepared, and be strong. Don't let their homebirth invalidations make you feel bad. Just say something like, "It was a good and well-researched experience, and I refuse to discuss it further." I've gotten good at this... :

BTW, going overdue wasn't an issue for me b/c I dropped the OB at 35 wks. YAY!

[ziursrm]

Wow and I thought my region was tough on homebirth, but these stories make me realize we're still pretty lucky and mostly left alone (in comparison). Thank-fully I moved during my pregnancy and had a good reason to drop my ob and start up with a mw. Texas is just too darn far from Idaho for prenatals.

[To-Fu]

I am 24w and just now deciding to make the switch to HB. I am seeing some CNMs who are, if rumors are true, hostile to HBs. If I tell them honestly that is what we are doing, they will drop me right away (or so say the doulas in town).

All this talk about CPS is really making me nervous. I know PA has some really wiggly laws about HB and I am starting to think we might want to get legal advice! Ugh.

[MarineWife]

Just check your local laws about HB. As far as I know, there isn't any state where it's illegal to have a HB. It's just not always legal for a midwife to attend a homebirth.

[LaurieG]

I'm glad to find this thread - I'm due next month and wondering the same thing. My plan has been the "it all happened so fast - we didn't make it to the hospital" story. I live in a MW unfriendly state and my OB is across the river in an even more unfriendly state. I really like my OB and would like to continue with her as my gynecologist so I'm hoping she doesn't fire me. But if she does, I'll live with it. She's generally pretty cool and knows my concerns with the hospital choices I have so although she won't like it I think she might understand in my case.

On a related concern - how do you deal with the Pediatrician? Knowing my DS's Ped I can imagine her head literally exploding at the thought. But I don't know of anyone else who is HB friendly as an alternative.

[heathenmom]

Originally Posted by LaurieG

On a related concern - how do you deal with the Pediatrician? Knowing my DS's Ped I can imagine her head literally exploding at the thought. But I don't know of anyone else who is HB friendly as an alternative.

I have to admit ... I have the world's most awesome ped! He's also an acupuncturist, and I got moxibustion from him twice late in the game since she was breech. When I called to make the appointment (I took her in at 4 days because we wanted the pku) they were a bit flumoxed, but when we got there, he was just getting to the office. He said: "She turned!" I said, "Yep. " He was sooo happy for us! The office was abuzz when they found out she was born at home, but he did a quick physical, kissed her on the head, pronounced her "perfect!" and told me we did great. No pushing vaxes (he didn't even OFFER them), no telling us how lucky we were that something terrible hadn't happened ... I him; he'd be MY doc if he would just agree to see grownups. LOL

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by LaurieG

On a related concern - how do you deal with the Pediatrician? Knowing my DS's Ped I can imagine her head literally exploding at the thought. But I don't know of anyone else who is HB friendly as an alternative.

I'm not really sure on this one yet. My midwife did all my and my baby's postnatal check ups up to 6 weeks. We don't vaccinate and I had no concerns about my baby's health so I didn't feel the need to take him to a doctor. A few weeks ago, though, I decided to take both my little ones in to talk to a pediatrician about food allergies/sensitivities. I told them my babe was born at home and that we do not vax. They wrote it down on his paperwork. Nothing else was said about it. He didn't, however, have a physical. The doc didn't examine him at all. He was asleep in the sling and that's where he stayed. I have a physical scheduled for him for the 2nd so I guess I'll find out then how this guy really feels about homebirthing and not vaxing. The woman from CPS who came out to my house made it very clear, though, that I had every right to have my baby at home and to not vax so at least I don't have to worry about that if the ped tries to threaten anything.

I can't remember if I said this before but, after talking to my midwife, I've learned that I should've just told the woman from the OB's office that I had a planned homebirth with a midwife and we both had follow up care. Then they wouldn't have had any cause to report me to CPS. That doesn't mean they wouldn't have but it may have been enough. I didn't say that in the beginning because I didn't want to get my midwife in any trouble.

[~Megan~]

I have care from my midwife. She was educated in how to care for pregnant women as well as laboring women, and postpartum.

Why do you feel the need to see an OB too?

[sw1ssm1ss]

Originally Posted by heathenmom

I have to admit ... I have the world's most awesome ped! He's also an acupuncturist, and I got moxibustion from him twice late in the game since she was breech. When I called to make the appointment (I took her in at 4 days because we wanted the pku) they were a bit flumoxed, but when we got there, he was just getting to the office. He said: "She turned!" I said, "Yep. " He was sooo happy for us! The office was abuzz when they found out she was born at home, but he did a quick physical, kissed her on the head, pronounced her "perfect!" and told me we did great. No pushing vaxes (he didn't even OFFER them), no telling us how lucky we were that something terrible hadn't happened ... I him; he'd be MY doc if he would just agree to see grownups. LOL

I love it! What a great ped!

I *do* see my kids' doctor--he's our family doctor--and it's been so great for us. He delivered both my babies as well.