how do i teach 4 year old not to interupt?

[kennethsmommy]

my son constantly interupts people, i often excuse myself from conversations and address him but when i return to the convo he starts again. how do i teach him not to interupt?

[LilyGrace]

We use the sign "wait" - palm(s) face up, turned in toward you, wiggle your fingers impatiently. It lets them know I've acknowledged them, and will get to them in turn.

[yogabear]

My dh and I have run into this issue a lot recently with our 4yo and 2yo. What we have done is explain to our girls what interrupting is, ask them how it would make them feel if they were telling a story and someone interrupted. We've always taught them that we treat others kind and respectful, and waiting our turn to talk is a way to be kind and respectful. We also let them know they everyone will get a turn to talk. We all have to share things as well as conversation.

Also, we've let them know to say, "Excuse me" if they do have something they would like to share or need something.

This is definitely one of those things that tests a parent's patience! Hope you find a solution that works for you and your son.

[dubfam]

:

[littlemizflava]

i have always done one finger up with eye contact

[karlin]

Well, we've had no luck with our 4 year old, although he does say, "Excuse me".

My guess is it's something that happens later....so my answer is to wait a couple years.

[captain optimism]

It's a phase, and people around you probably know that. I say, quietly, "I would really like to hear what Daddy (or whomever) is saying." Sometimes that's enough, and sometimes not. This comes from a laudable desire to participate in adult life, so whatever you can do to channel the positive impulse is good, and if it doesn't work out, excuse yourself and then come back and start over!

[oliversmum2000]

my ds is 7 and has been going through this phase for 3 years

[DevaMajka]

My 3yo is definitely in this stage. I'll start talking, he'll say "excuse me" then say something (he doesn't even have anything to say- he thinks of something on the spot). I'll respond, then go back to talking, and he'll say "excuse me" again immediately. Over and over and over. Basically, as many times as it takes to stop my conversation. lol

I like the idea of having them put a hand on your arm when they have something to say. You put your hand over theirs to let them know that you will respond as soon as you are at a stopping point. I haven't tried it, but I'm going to. It sounds like it might be helpful.

[UrbanPlanter]

ds is 5 but what has been working really well for us lately is "it's my turn to talk" - I think he understands this concept and that he will get a turn soon. I'll even say "it's my turn to talk, and when I'm done, it's your turn"

[TinyMama]

When I taught preschool I ran into this problem a lot. I would usually pause the first time each child interrupted me each day (kinda hard to keep track of, but I tried!) and remind them, "I'm speaking now, please wait patiently." The next time that child interrupted me I would just put one finger up. If they were determined to interrupt, I would remind them "Wait, please." At that point I would continue whatever I was saying for a few minutes before turning to the LO. Don't make them wait too long, otherwise they will be less likely to wait patiently in the future. (But, if the LO wants to participate in the conversation, I would definitely encourage that--and of course, it's hard to predict when that's what they want!)

ETA: The important thing seems to be to NOT provide a lot of discussion with the child--definitely don't address his concern unless you can see that it requires a one-word answer or is time sensitive (eg, his friends are playing outside and he needs permission immediately). Otherwise the LO will have figured out a great way to avoid learning the difficult but essential lesson of patience.

[SpiralWoman]

great reponses! My 4 yo ds is doing a good job of remembering to say "excuse me" but then he says it 10 times in a row I like the hand on arm thing, we'll try that!
~Maria

[kennethsmommy]

thank you very much, i will be trying some of these ideas!

[goomjiji]

I'm just starting to work on this with my almost 3 year old. I do something similiar to the hand on the arm. He gently squeeze my are, I gently squeeze his, etc. I'm mostly just doing this for when I'm on the phone right now. So far, I get the two squeezes and before I can ask the other person to hold on for a minute, he's saying "I want to say hi!" , but it's a start.

OT: I was talking to the utilities company today and he wanted to say hi. I told him it was a business call (so he knew he couldn't chat), and he said, "Is it a monkey business call?"

[veggiemomma]

Okay, I am slightly dislexic and read your title as "interpretting"

Needless to say, I was confused by the OP and by several of the responses until I finally realized my mistake. I kept thinking "what is he interpretting?"

My 3.5 yo is always like this. "mommy, mommy, hey mommy, hey mommy, mommy, did you see that, did you see that, hey MOMMY did YOU see that?":

[Susan Kunkel]

We have this problem with my 5.5 ds.What works for us is to keep talking .Whenwe are done then turn to him and say Mom and Dad were talking .How can we now help you.
Susan