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Moms of Many October support thread - Page 6

post #101 of 147
Orangefoot.
post #102 of 147
maybe I can get back here this weekend.I keep trying to post but the to do list gets in the way.
I've been having a hard time this week with nursing 3.The oldest nursling has been demanding alot more often and so DD feels she needs me and they get to tussling and me and the little guy are caught in the middle.Not cool!
However I did have this mad idea pitter patter by.What if I had another and it was a little girl.Madness, I tell you madness!We were supposed to be done at 3 and then little guy snuck in.(I didn't even know he was there until I was 19 weeks!)DH and I have been talking but it is up to him to get snipped and he still hasn't.We also have a truck that seats 9 now.....No really I am very good at 4 kids.
As for space I think you can do alot with a small space it just depends on where the largest ammount is.Our place is 1395 including a garage.I don't know why but it seems that most places have really huge bedrooms and closets and small living,dining and kitchens.I wish we had an actual dining area not a space in the kitchen for a decorative table.A small space sucks hockey pucks when kids are fighting and you need a Calgon moment however.
I have also been 5-10 minutes behind all week.One more day and then DS is on school break.yippee! I hope I don't waste his vacation.
post #103 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by spruce View Post
Any baby born into your family will be so blessed.

/Yeah, we have 6 and I want more but Dh says we're done (to the point that he RUNS from my amorous attentions!) ... How sad is that?

post #104 of 147
ITA with crittersmom- the one thing that is going to improve our life immeasurably is getting the extension up so we have space for a table again. Right now we have a table, but it's pushed up against the window and doesn't get used properly. We still eat together, just sitting on sofas talking :
post #105 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by flapjack View Post
ITA with crittersmom- the one thing that is going to improve our life immeasurably is getting the extension up so we have space for a table again. Right now we have a table, but it's pushed up against the window and doesn't get used properly. We still eat together, just sitting on sofas talking :
At least you are eating together! Isn't that the point!

We've been looking at houses lately, but I'm amazed at how small the kitchen area is where you would put a table or even the formal dining room is.

I looked at one and said that to the realtor. He assumed I meant when family was over and said we could seat some over in there. I said, I mean every night.

We modified our house as it was being built. I had them add an extra foot in width and an extension out back so as to fit a bigger table. I don't know what we'd do now if I hadn't done that.
post #106 of 147
bump
post #107 of 147
The one thing I really wish we had. An actual dining room! We eat together 3 times a day (me and the kids, dh joins us for dinner) and it is such a central part of bringing us together to reconnect throughout the day. We have a little 'nook' which works alright, but I would prefer something a little more defined.
post #108 of 147
That's awesome that you guys eat together like that!
post #109 of 147
Help!

What do you all do when multiple kids are having meltdowns? It's been diffused, but I just had my four year old crying, the three month old crying (tired), the one year old I watch crying (tired) and my two year old yelling and throwing toys.
post #110 of 147
I would love to have a dozen! DH on the other hand would be satisfied with 4 (I'm pregnant with #4 right now!) He will have as many I want though, so we'll see.
post #111 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post
Help!

What do you all do when multiple kids are having meltdowns? It's been diffused, but I just had my four year old crying, the three month old crying (tired), the one year old I watch crying (tired) and my two year old yelling and throwing toys.
I don't know.Its something I've been trying to muddle through but I bknow I need to look it up cuz I feel like crying too sometimes.

We eat at the same time but the kids are at the itty bitty table and DH and I are on the couch.We are in a townhouse so its kinda like we are in one room but its not ideal.DH is supposed to finish a picnic table so we can eat outside.It is so important and much easier to clean up if we eat together.
post #112 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post
Help!

What do you all do when multiple kids are having meltdowns? It's been diffused, but I just had my four year old crying, the three month old crying (tired), the one year old I watch crying (tired) and my two year old yelling and throwing toys.
I resort to TV. Where's the bag over the head smiley....
post #113 of 147
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post
Help!

What do you all do when multiple kids are having meltdowns? It's been diffused, but I just had my four year old crying, the three month old crying (tired), the one year old I watch crying (tired) and my two year old yelling and throwing toys.
Tired 3 month old = into the sling with them. You can can nurse, rock, bounce, whatever while you move on to...
One year old = tend to their needs first before moving on to...
Two year old = needs a hug, maybe read a story, play a game.
Four year old = include in story, game and hugs.

Yes, some of them will cry for a while. But I feel that the youngest ones need to be attended to first, because the older ones have had a bit more time to learn self-soothing and hopefully they understand at least on some level that their needs will be met.

This is, of course, where AP comes into play. When our children are solidly connected with us, they learn to trust that even if we can't help them immediately, we will get there and make it better.

Big big to you and everyone having a meltdown. It can be so hard sometimes.
post #114 of 147
Actually, I'd disagree with DiD

Step 1- stick the rescue remedy in mummy's mouth.
2- biggest crisis is the 2yo. If you can get the newborn in the sling on your way to cuddling and calming the one who's about to break something/someone, that's good, but if you can't, then sort the toddler out. I'd calm him down, empty out his hands and send him off to pick a book for everyone to read together.
3- baby in sling, 1yo on hip, head off to the kitchen for a drink and a snack to get everyone's blood sugars back up a little. Make one for 2yo.
4- Sit down and read a book together.
5- naptime
post #115 of 147
Quote:
Originally Posted by phathui5 View Post
Help!

What do you all do when multiple kids are having meltdowns? It's been diffused, but I just had my four year old crying, the three month old crying (tired), the one year old I watch crying (tired) and my two year old yelling and throwing toys.
I find silliness is really the only way out of a situation like that. Usually it starts with me taking a very, very deep breath and mentally reminding myself to keep my emotions in check. Then I just do something silly. If the 6 and 4 year olds are involved I often starting throwing my own tantrum in a silly whiny voice ("I hate when everyone gets upset at once and I can't help them and they won't listen to me and people start throwing things and everyone yells and its too LOUDDDDDDD!" in a somewhat ridiculous voice). Silliness always works with them, and once they are calm I can deal with what they need one-by-one. If the 2 yo is involved it can be more challenging as she somewhat language delayed and gets frustrated. Often I just need to stop what I am doing just to figure out what she needs. Unfortunately at that moment I may just need to put the crying baby down in the hammock until I can deal with her. As for the babe, she is happy when nursing or being held, and if that doesn't work she is overtired and sometimes just bouncing her in the hammock or putting her tummy down on the bed will help her to fuss for a minute and sleep (she gets overtired and won't settle in my arms).

Often it is a balancing act to figure out which needs are most urgent in that second. If you can get one quieted you can deal with the next (assembly line style ). As long as I keep my frustration in line it works out okay.
post #116 of 147
I like the other step-by-step instructions. I would say it depends on the situation. Sometimes it is based on urgency, other times by age. Violence stops first. Baby in sling is a must. Though sometimes it is better to have the toddler in the sling.

Sometimes a really big "STOP" will make everyone look at me in shock (I am not a yeller) and I can distract the whole bunch of them with a snack and a story.

When it all works out I feel like I could rule the world. When it doesn't I would like run away
post #117 of 147
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeRangeMama View Post

When it all works out I feel like I could rule the world. When it doesn't I would like run away
Oh yeah, me too.
post #118 of 147
QOTD: How much does your tribe eat for lunch?
post #119 of 147
AOTD: Today we had six grilled cheese sandwiches, two slices of plain bread, three cans of tomato soup and two sliced apples.
post #120 of 147
Just found this thread! Does almost-four count as "many?"

Looking forward to getting some advice from other mamas. I feel like I run around like a chicken with its head cut off all day and still nothing gets done. I'm starting to feel nervous about how I'm going to cope with a new babe in the house too!
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