What hurts worse than childbirth? - Page 3

[nitemarehippygirl]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

do most people just not challenge their bodies, or endure any other kind of pain in today's society and therefotre childbirth *is* really the hardest thing they have (or maybe will) ever do? I'm struggling to understand because if what I've read here is normal then I may be doing a disservice in my childbirth classes by my opinion that it's work but not terrible or suffering kind of pain.

you know, this post sort rubbed me the wrong way. i hear people here talking about their joyful, empowering childbirths, and i think that's great if that's your experience. heck, i'm even kind of jealous. that's what we all want and hope for, right? but that was not mine, and it's not because i'm a wuss and never "challenge my body". it's also not because i had a terrible negative additude about the whole thing. i didn't. i'm not going to specifically list all of the issues that i/we had, but it's important to remember that not everyone is going to have an identical experience to yours.
if you are painting a one sided, rosey picture of birth to your class, maybe you are doing a disservice. it's ok to present that as your experience, but it's not a universal one. i think birth should be seen as a miraculous experience, but there's no reason to gloss over the difficult painful side. that's just as real for many people. you can express your experience without invalidating anyone elses.
i assume if you are teaching some kind of childbirth class, it's because you care about women, and want them to have to best experience possible. that's commendable. it occurs to me though, that some of your students may end up feeling like failures or morons if they find themselves in overwhelming pain. they'll remember how you said it wasn't *that* bad, etc, and wonder what's wrong with them.
i'm thinking it would be better to try to support everyone's experience, not just the people who have a similar one to yours...

[Rockies5]

Originally Posted by TechnoGranola

Apparently any pain that DH has to endure, is worse than childbirth...

: : :

[georgia]

Here is another thread that discussed pain:

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=567009

[Rockies5]

Originally Posted by nitemarehippygirl

you know, this post sort rubbed me the wrong way. i hear people here talking about their joyful, empowering childbirths, and i think that's great if that's your experience. heck, i'm even kind of jealous. that's what we all want and hope for, right? but that was not mine, and it's not because i'm a wuss and never "challenge my body".

yeah I agree with all that you said too. I had one birth that was like nothing I could describe. Very tough. I'm not glossing, or blaming any one's "mindpower" or beliefs for them having a painful or even excruciating experience. Calling names ("failure", "wuss", whatever else).

I was asking a plain question because I want to understand.

I'm sorry to all of you who thought there was sarcasm or blame there, (and all the others who will read only a few posts, probably miss this one and call me out on it again).

I need to understand, which is why I asked the question. I'm sorry if it was worded thoughtlessly or in a way to make people think I was being snotty. totally wasn't meant that way.

I'm trying to learn here. I work in and with birth and so far I haven't seen anything resembling like many of you describe. So all I was thinking was "Here's a new idea or faucet of womens expereince of birth!" and I excitedly started trying to ask questions. That's the point, right?

[Romana]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

yeah I agree with all that you said too. I had one birth that was like nothing I could describe. Very tough. I'm not glossing, or blaming any one's "mindpower" or beliefs for them having a painful or even excruciating experience. Calling names ("failure", "wuss", whatever else).

I was asking a plain question because I want to understand.

I'm sorry to all of you who thought there was sarcasm or blame there, (and all the others who will read only a few posts, probably miss this one and call me out on it again).

I need to understand, which is why I asked the question. I'm sorry if it was worded thoughtlessly or in a way to make people think I was being snotty. totally wasn't meant that way.

I'm trying to learn here. I work in and with birth and so far I haven't seen anything resembling like many of you describe. So all I was thinking was "Here's a new idea or faucet of womens expereince of birth!" and I excitedly started trying to ask questions. That's the point, right?

I'm sorry - I'm unable to find where you asked a question. Please point to that in your post so I can try to answer it. I think it's essential that CBEs understand, are sensitive to, and prepare their students for the possibility of a painful birth.

If this was your question:

do most people just not challenge their bodies, or endure any other kind of pain in today's society and therefotre childbirth *is* really the hardest thing they have (or maybe will) ever do?

then yes, it was worded in a manner that sounds condescending and judgmental, and I don't think it bears answering again since I think I and others have responded to it.

[gcgirl]

I keep reading that "studies" say childbirth is the worst pain a human can experience. But then I think about some horrible accidents I've read about, like the woman who was smashed between two cars and essentially had her legs ripped off. I'm sorry, but I have to think that would hurt worse than childbirth.

[~Megan~]

My gall bladder attack was much worse.

[Viola]

I would rather go through childbirth again than have an abscessed tooth--I think. Both my labors were shorter than the duration of my abscesses.

I had a herniated disk and I kept thinking, "Well, at least it's not as bad as childbirth pain" until it ruptured and I was only floor in agony and I couldn't get up and my dh had to call the ambulance At that point, I decided that was worse than childbirth.

I think the problem is stuff like abscessed teeth, ruptured disks and broken bones just feel so wrong. At least with childbirth, in most cases, you feel like it is a purposeful pain. Plus I honestly don't remember the pain as much. I just remember things I said like, If I were at the hospital, I would have taken the epidural by now! and God Bless America!!! and wow, it's over, I never have to do that again! followed by an intense feeling of ecstacy. (of course, it's wouldn't be unlike me to scream during a painful bowel movement either.)

The pain might have been worse during childbirth if I had squatted during contractions, but I did that once and immediately said, "Oh no, no way, no way can I do that." The first push was the most painful part and I was feeling just a bit panicky like, "OMG, I'm pushing and I'm in worse pain than ever!" But then the subsequent pushes were better, and when I felt her head moving down through the bones, I thought it felt cool and not like I was being ripped apart (which was how my sister described it).

I had a broken finger and it hurt, but it was much more localized than childbirth. If someone had wrenched it all around after it was broken, yeah, that would have been horrible. But having it immobilized in a cast took away a lot of the pain.

Burn pains hurt like hell, I just can't imagine having any significant ones.

For me: Wisdom teeth extraction, dry socket afterwards were no big deal. Carpal tunnel can be bad, but it's not usually a long lasting kind of pain. I did have some horrible horrible menstrual cramps when I was younger that were almost as bad as being in labor. Sitting on the toilet for hours at a time, feeling like I was going to vomit, and like I might defecate, like something was being rammed up my anus...OK, yeah, TMI, but I am glad I don't have that anymore.

[nitemarehippygirl]

Originally Posted by Rockies5

I'm trying to learn here. I work in and with birth and so far I haven't seen anything resembling like many of you describe. So all I was thinking was "Here's a new idea or faucet of womens expereince of birth!" and I excitedly started trying to ask questions. That's the point, right?

ok, i'll admit. i thought you were being snarky. i apologize if my perception was wrong. i am glad you're asking questions, if the answers might help you in your class, or just in relating to other mamas that had less than ideal experiences.
i didn't go into childbirth thinking it was going to be a diasaster, but for me it was. i'm not saying my experience is the norm either. it's probably not. i just think you have to mentally prepare yourself for things to go either way.
i think it's great that your students can hear your positive experiences, and know that they might have an equally positive experience. i just think you have to qualify your statements by acknowledging that pain can also be very real, and is an equally valid response...that way people aren't made to feel guilty for not living up to the expectation or whatever...

does that make sense?

[lilgsmommy]

The only thing that I can think of worse than childbirth for me, was when I had my pancreatitis/gall blader attacks. I even yelled at the EMTs, as they were trying to help me, that I was in worse pain than when I gave birth, and I would rather have been giving birth at that time instead of whatever was going on....1 week in the hospital and 2 surgies....showed severe pancreatitis, and my gall bladder was close to exploding..literally.

[AugustLia23]

While I remember that giving birth hurt, a LOT. I don't remember the actual pain at all. Labor is not so bad as the baby coming through your vagina. Talk about a BIG feeling.

[laurata]

Oh man. This winter I had my wisdom teeth removed. One was really big, partially erupted, and the surrounding tissue was infected. I threw up when I got home, and developed a dry socket. Well, wisdom teeth removal is classically painful, right? I didn't get into see my surgeon for almost a week! I wanted to die. Giving birth ten times would be less painful than that! :

[mittendrin]

Sciatic pain, is what I wanted to say at first. But thinking about it again - no, nothing I've ever experienced comes close to the pain. Maybe afterpains, but they're essentially the same thing, so it doesn't count.
When I talk about the pain it doesn't bring up any negative feelings tho, it's a good kinda pain. Hard to explain to someone who hasn't birthed naturally yet, right?

[goodheartedmama]

the contractions while breastfeeding AFTER giving birth. Especially with your second child. I can't imagine anything hurts that bad...besides perhaps with a third or fourth child.

[the_lissa]

Wisdom teeth. Migraine. I had surgery and it didn't hurt at all, luckily.

I can't believe you got in to your dental surgeon in a week. I went to the dentist today, and my oral surgeon consult isn't until November 30th. I hope my surgery is very quick after the consult.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Mashing my finger in dh's truck door way worse. Tooth ach 100000000x's worse. The pain I had in my stomach night before last.

[LoveChild421]

Originally Posted by AugustLia23

While I remember that giving birth hurt, a LOT. I don't remember the actual pain at all. Labor is not so bad as the baby coming through your vagina. Talk about a BIG feeling.

for me it was the opposite, I didn't feel the "ring of fire" and the baby coming through didn't hurt that bad compared to the contractions when I was in transition.

Cryosurgery on my cervix was much worse than labor and birth. And the cryo lasted 2 minutes in comparison to a 20 hour labor- I'd still choose birth over that pain anyday.

I had a really bad UTI once that was worse than labor.

[candiland]

Laying on the floor literally screaming in pain overnight...........from about 9 pm until 6am... I still don't know what caused that pain, but I had waves upon waves upon waves of the worst pain I've ever experienced in my life. When I look back on my two homebirths, I guess I kind of remember transition and pushing as really intense, but it's nothing I would write home about.

[the_lissa]

Originally Posted by LoveChild421

for me it was the opposite, I didn't feel the "ring of fire" and the baby coming through didn't hurt that bad compared to the contractions when I was in transition.

Yeah labour really hurt me, but birth didn't hurt me at all.

[thismama]

Originally Posted by the_lissa

Yeah labour really hurt me, but birth didn't hurt me at all.

Same here.