Its stinky TMI - Page 8

[YummyYumYumMama]

NEVER MIND DON'T EVER READ ANYTHING I WRITE. I am too stupid for this world.

[mama2rey]

Originally Posted by MmeMuffin

NEVER MIND DON'T EVER READ ANYTHING I WRITE. I am too stupid for this world.

You OK? I love your posts-they make me laugh really hard. I can't imagine you writting anything stupid!!!!

[mama_b]

Well, it's still hot out here and our apartment complex decided to convert over to the heating system so we have no air conditioning. : Anyway, it was really hot last night and the only way I could stand to sleep was in my underwear. Poor dh. There were no pants or covers to trap my smelliness. I know he could smell me but he was nice and didn't say anything. :

[clintonhillmama]

from our fanclub, i think we've been out-TMI-ed!!!!:

Originally Posted by mosesface

oh wow.
i am so thankful that i got to read that thread and read choice bits of it to dh before i had my very own ridiculous stinky TMI moment yesterday afternoon.

are you people ready for this? i was not ready for this.

i've never had a very well trained colon. my whole life i can't really remember pooping more than two or three times a week. my midwife was very concerned about this fact when i told her early in pregnancy. she insisted that i start using glycerin suppositories and do my best to poo every day and promised that i would thank her later.

oh dear lord how i wish i had listened to this wise woman.

yesterday afternoon i decided that i should probably use a suppository since i hadn't gone in a couple of days and i have a mw appt on thursday and need to give a good report. once the suppository kicked in and i sat on the toilet i knew there something "special" about this poo.

the pressure was so intense, i reached down to feel my perineum only to discover that i was indeed attempting to pass something the size of a grapefruit through my anus. there was a point when i panicked and thought for sure i was going to have to go to the emergency room because i was going to be split in half. there was absolutely no way something this large was going to come out of a hole that small!!

i started thinking through everything i've read about labor and prayed to god for mercy. i used deep breathing, walking, rocking, and some squatting. in time (about 30 minutes) my body took over and i absolutely had to push. it was the most intense feeling ever and i was sure i was being torn to bits but once it was out, i cried from relief.

the size of this poop was so incredible, i INSISTED that dh come and look. we both teared up at the sight, simultaneously proud and terrified at what my body had done. that poo was about 4.5 inches in diameter and almost two feet long. i made gloves out of plastic bags so that i could break it up into pieces small enough to flush (it took 5 flushes to get it all). it had to weigh at least 5 pounds and the first half was ROCK HARD.

needless to say, i waddled around sore for the rest of the day and most of this morning.

that, my friends, is hopefully as disgusting as this pregnancy will get.:

[YummyYumYumMama]

Originally Posted by expectantmami

You OK? I love your posts-they make me laugh really hard. I can't imagine you writting anything stupid!!!!

Thanks! Sadly for me, I don't remember what I wrote, but whatever it was... it was pretty dumb. Like, painfully dumb. Ditzy dumb. Nonsensical, what-does-that-even-mean dumb. It's one of those days.

Originally Posted by clintonhillmama

from our fanclub, i think we've been out-TMI-ed!!!!:

HOLY CRAP. No pun intended. And I thought MY ginormous poops were bad.

[Diva Mama]

WOW! She's like my exact opposite. In the world of marvel comics, she'd be my arch-enemy!

[SheBear]

Heehee! MmeMuffin, *I* know what you wrote! It came to my inbox before you could edit.....how much are you offering me to keep quiet??


:

[YummyYumYumMama]

Originally Posted by SheBear

Heehee! MmeMuffin, *I* know what you wrote! It came to my inbox before you could edit.....how much are you offering me to keep quiet??


:

You get them in your e-mail? How? I actually have no clue what I said anyway, but I do remember it being stupid. Just confirm for me it WAS stupid, right?

[SheBear]

Go to your User CP, go to "Edit Options" and under Messaging & Notifications, where it says "Default Thread Subscription Mode", choose "Instant Email Notification"

Then you will get an email alerting you to new replies on any thread to which you have replied/subscribed. Cool, huh?

And no, I didn't think what you said was stupid. I thought it was funny, and was about to respond to it when I noticed you'd edited. (it was something about the smilie, btw.....and totally what I was thinking, too!)

Then again, I don't know if the fact that *I* agreed with you is going to offer much comfort or reassurance!

[YummyYumYumMama]

Oh yeah. When I looked at the smiley again it looked totally different and I felt like an idiot. It was me saying that the spit-drink smiley spits back into its own glass and drinks it... well, it doesn't. The cup is empty while the smiley laughs and then it refills itself magically. Then I realized I was looking way too hard at this smiley and that I am just a waste of space.

So this means you have seen some of my other dumbass things on this thread, even the ones I was quick enough to edit within seconds and so they didn't show up as edits. GREAT. I can feel my self-esteem lowering by the second.

[AGlimmeringHope]

Okay...dd's vocabularly is really bulking up and she's labeling things herself now.

Her word for when someone farts?

...Mama

[weliveintheforest]

I prefer to think my sense of smell is getting stronger, not my actual smell....
but I'm lying to myself. I stink too.

[moondiapers]

I don't get stinky, but I get A LOT of watery discharge. I end up wearing pads the last trimester just to soak it all up. We joke that the baby is lubing up the slide for the trip. At the end of the day it gets pretty stale, but it's a staleness, not extra stink IYKWIM. I'm a before bed bather anyway so it's no big.

[mama2rey]

I grossed my cat out!

I had to pee-and my kitty came in for a visit. She likes to be petted while I am on the toilet (don't know why!).

Just now she came in-did her usual rubbing up against my legs-and then I noticed that she caught a sniff of my underwear. She gave me the most disgusted look I have ever seen and BOLTED out of the bathroom! She now won't come near me!

So much for our pets giving us unconditional love!

[CowsRock]

Originally Posted by transformed

But it sucked today because I dont have the energy to grocery shop so I sit here being hungry.

Geeze-louise...me too! And I'm feeling so crappy for not having anything to eat, but too tired to run out to the store...but I know I'll continue to feel tired until I eat something better than I have already eaten. I'm not even sure how I ran out of cereal, it is normally something I'm obsessive about having around.

Ahhh, hubby is making me a shake right now...I will be rescued from this trap of hunger. Besides being too lazy/tired to go to the store, I would have to take a shower first due to the lovely odors that we are all discussing. I don't think my smell down south is smelly so much, but it is certainly very strong...very, very strong and I'm convinced that anyone smelling the smell would immediately know where it was coming from. Probably not even close to true, but still what I'm convinced of.

[CowsRock]

Originally Posted by Lizzardbits

Lately my feet have stunk to high heaven, and he knows it.

Maybe it's a pregnancy thing then? I sure hope so! I've been grossing myself out and I just assumed the feet stink was because I have to wear my shoes all the time because otherwise my feet hurt too much. Although that logic doesn't make much sense now that I type it because most normal people wear shoes for most of the day. I'm just used to not wearing shoes for the majority of the day. Oh whatever, my feet stink too, maybe there is hope that someday they won't stink anymore. Why should I waste any of my already diminishing brain power to try to determine why they stink and when it will stop?

[crsta33]

Oh, I've got a new one. I was trying to poop, which is a feat since I suffer almost constant constipation, so I've learned this trick of folding some tp and supporting my perineum with it while pooping. Well, apparently, my bladder wasn't empty and I ended up peeing all over my hand! I was shocked, I had no idea I was about to pee and suddenly I'm soaked.

Luckily I didn't have on a long sleeved shirt.

I was also going to mention that I'm not the only stinky one in my house. I do not like the way my dh smells. I think my sense of smell *is* much more sensitive.

Christa

[CowsRock]

Geeze, that is just not right...

[clintonhillmama]

ummmm....do you ladies know anything about female ejaculation?

....because either i experienced it for the first time last night.....

-OR-

....i peed all over dh:.

only funny remarks necessary, i can't believe i'm even admitting this!

at least we've determined that my water's not broken!

[SheBear]

Sorry, mama! I did that during my last pg. I *WISH* I could convince myself it wasn't pee! : Especially since it happened during a particularly....um, *oral* moment! :

My only consolation is that dh didn't notice it until I freaked out....or so he says......


It's just so sad that now I'm almost afraid to have a great O for fear of it happening again!! So very, very sad.....