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Its stinky TMI - Page 5

post #81 of 567
10/9/07 at 2:25am
I switched MW practices in August, and happily, these MWs have you just stick the end of a strip into your urine stream, and if the test blobs stay the same color, you can just throw it out.

I have peed all over the urine specimen cups (and my hand) in the past and always worried that I'd make my name (which I'd write on beforehand so as not to have to write it on a pee-soaked cup thus getting pee all over the pen as well) completely illegible.

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post #82 of 567
10/9/07 at 3:22am
Quote:
Originally Posted by MmeMuffin View Post
I switched MW practices in August, and happily, these MWs have you just stick the end of a strip into your urine stream, and if the test blobs stay the same color, you can just throw it out.

I have peed all over the urine specimen cups (and my hand) in the past and always worried that I'd make my name (which I'd write on beforehand so as not to have to write it on a pee-soaked cup thus getting pee all over the pen as well) completely illegible.
I have done this too!! Everytime I pee in the cup I brace myself with the toilet paper. I always hope that they wear gloves when they deal with my cup-because little do they know......
post #83 of 567
10/9/07 at 9:32am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crsta33 View Post
Speaking of peeing...have you tried to pee in a cup for that silly urine sample? My midwife only does them a couple of times, but geesh, I can't get it in the cup. It goes all over the side and my hand and everywhere. And last time my dd was with me and she kept asking me why I was peeing in a cup! I wipe the cup off as best as I can, but I'm so embarassed to hand it over knowing it just had pee all over the outside...eww.

Christa
Mabye if we had a penis....I am so jealous.

I assume everyone does that, I don't see how you can really get a good "stream" going with the equipment we have.
post #84 of 567
10/9/07 at 9:38am
Quote:
Originally Posted by expectantmami View Post
I always hope that they wear gloves when they deal with my cup-because little do they know......
LOL. Seriously. I also would imagine them having clothespins over their noses or surgical masks on or something 'cause my pee does NOT smell good. It really just smells gross. I don't know why. It's so weird. I drink at least 8 glasses of water a day and usually more! My pee smells like I'm drinking nothing but coffee all the time. Makes me wanna barf. My cat loves it though and sniffs at the toilet as I get up to flush, which makes it EVEN GROSSER to me.
post #85 of 567
10/9/07 at 3:15pm
This thread is the funniest ever!!!!
I just let out the biggest sigh of relief that I've escaped most of the stinkiness (this is gross though... first week we lived in new house our hot water heater was broken.. I just couldn't take an ice cold shower, so I didn't the entire time
I do spend 24/7 belching like a 400 pound frat boy at a keg party though.
post #86 of 567
10/9/07 at 3:26pm
I don't have a real problem peeing into the cup, but last time I dropped the cup in the floor when I was done! And not a little bit o pee, either! My MW's rug got soaked with my pee! I cleaned up best as I could, but I had to admit to her why she was going to later find her rug balled up and moved from its usual spot!
post #87 of 567
10/9/07 at 10:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by transformed View Post

I assume everyone does that, I don't see how you can really get a good "stream" going with the equipment we have.
I don't usually have TOO much of a problem - after 19 years of Army urinalyses, I feel like a pro. But the thing is, now, I can't see down there well enough to tell if I'm gonna make the cup. It's like some kind of cruel joke - "I know you can't see past your navel, but I'd like you to pee in this little cup (hehehehehehe)."
post #88 of 567
10/10/07 at 12:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SheBear View Post
I have a horribly painful zit on my patootie, right next to my anus. It is huge, and full of pus and needs to be drained....but the mere thought of the accompanying pain has my nether-cheeks whimpering.
It popped! Ick! and also? Ahhhhh!
post #89 of 567
10/14/07 at 12:38am
Why is this thread on page 3!?!

Does anyone else's pee stink? Mine is gross. I need to drink more water to dilute it or something.
post #90 of 567
10/14/07 at 12:39am
Quote:
Originally Posted by starry_mama View Post
Why is this thread on page 3!?!

Does anyone else's pee stink? Mine is gross. I need to drink more water to dilute it or something.
I don't know-but it's my favorite thread so thanks for bumping it!! My pee stinks too!
post #91 of 567
10/14/07 at 1:57am
My pee smells horrific and I drink 8+ glasses a day, generally more like 12. Ugh. I can hardly stand to be in the bathroom while I go!
post #92 of 567
10/14/07 at 2:41am
Quote:
Originally Posted by MmeMuffin View Post
My pee smells horrific and I drink 8+ glasses a day, generally more like 12. Ugh. I can hardly stand to be in the bathroom while I go!
Me TOO! It's so foul- I hold my breath while I'm peeing for fear of inhaling the toxic mist! :Puke I can see the headlines now: "EXPECTANT MOTHER ASPHYXIATES FROM OWN URINE STENCH!"

Yup- I never thought I'd have to worry about airing out the bathroom after a simple whizz! Icky! Gotta love pregnancy!

Long live the stinky TMI thread! It can never die!
post #93 of 567
10/14/07 at 3:23am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SheBear View Post
It popped! Ick! and also? Ahhhhh!
By the Way- CONGRATULATIONS! That has GOT to feel much better! ( I know from experience...)
post #94 of 567
10/14/07 at 12:54pm
I am SO glad not to be alone with the smelly pee thing. I kept wanting to bring it up to the MW to see if it was normal, but I was too embarrassed... so I'm glad that I'm not the only one!

ETA: Ok, I moved this in from the "making it easier to pee" thread 'cause I felt that TMI was better off here. So in post 20 here, I mentioned that Alex walked in on me doing "toilet yoga" to get all the pee out, and then SheBear responded to me on the next page, and I responded to her but realized that it was pretty TMI and probably more suitable for here!

Quote:
Originally Posted by SheBear View Post
That is SOOOOO hilarious!! I would have been mortified (and found it impossible to explain!) if my dh had walked in whilst I was in that position! I think I would have lied and said I was reaching for something!
Alex has seen way, way worse.... For example, the week that we started dating, I had just got my first Keeper (reusable menstrual cup). I didn't have my period and figured I'd try inserting it as a "dry run" so I wouldn't be bleeding the first time I tried it. Sure enough, it got stuck way up there somehow, and though I tried every tip I had heard of, I could not for the life of me get it out! Alex came over, and I was clearly upset, and didn't know what to do, so he managed to get me to explain the situation, and calmly offered to pull it out. My hero! Actually, I forgot to tell him I wasn't having my period, and he suggested he'd do it assuming that I was menstruating.

Also, I have Bigfoot poop and I have backed up toilets many a time. He has shoved me out of the way and plunged for me quite a few of these times (I tend to freeze up and FREAK OUT when this happens). So, considering how many times he's seen my gargantuan bowel movements, walking in on me doing toilet yoga ain't no thang. I do wish he'd stop telling people that my poo is the length/width of a normal person's arm, though.
post #95 of 567
10/14/07 at 3:36pm
can I just agree with everyone else and leave it at that? im rotf, cant get the term "crotch washer" out of my mind.
post #96 of 567
10/15/07 at 1:15am
MmeMuffin -- The WEEK you started DATING? He helped you remove your stuck Keeper?
post #97 of 567
10/15/07 at 2:52am
Quote:
Originally Posted by HoneymoonBaby View Post
MmeMuffin -- The WEEK you started DATING? He helped you remove your stuck Keeper?
Yes ma'am. Does that make me seem like a skanky ho? We were already doing the deed by then, so perhaps I AM a skanky ho.

We had met in October (of 02) and kind of had a very, very minor fling that lasted a couple days... then we decided to just be friends as we'd both recently come out of major relationships, but there was always something there. We became best friends, actually, and were really close when we did finally start dating in February (03).

Not so close I'd say, "Hey, would you pull this menstrual cup out of my vagina?" I mean, we were best friends, but now he was my boyfriend. And while I've certainly met plenty of feminist vagina-friendly men, I sure didn't feel comfortable asking my new boyfriend to reach into my vajingo and yank out a piece of rubber. I was extremely embarrassed that he offered. But he said it was no big deal to HIM, and wouldn't it be a lot worse to make a doc appt for something so minimal? He kind of thought it was silly for me to make such a fuss when it would take him 2 seconds and the ordeal would be over and all I'd have to do would be get over my own embarrassment and then we could go get some dinner.

Sorry for writing you a book, I'm eternally awake because I can't stop peeing.
post #98 of 567
10/15/07 at 3:27am
Quote:
Originally Posted by MmeMuffin View Post
Not so close I'd say, "Hey, would you pull this menstrual cup out of my vagina?" I mean, we were best friends, but now he was my boyfriend. And while I've certainly met plenty of feminist vagina-friendly men, I sure didn't feel comfortable asking my new boyfriend to reach into my vajingo and yank out a piece of rubber.
laughup: Priceless...
Reminds me of several years back- a guy I had recently met and I were returning from a hike- and he had just finished telling me how phobic of ticks he was- when he found just such a parasite attached firmly to his- um...*ahem* 'testies'! We're talkin' waaaay back there, too- in the under/nether region on the backside of those puppies where he couldn't see to save his life! He had to ask me to remove it for him! : It was either that or a trip to the ER to have the Drs. remove a tick from his gonads-
You should have seen him with his legs all up in the air- I was cracking up! being a Mama in the woods, I've seen my share of ticks, so it was no big deal for me- but I doubt he saw it that way! The poor guy was nearly passing out from his fear! (having a tick phobia and a girl he barely knew with tweezers up in his business...pretty nerve wracking!)
Quite an ice breaker, I tell ya'!
(And goodness- if you're a skanky ho then so am I!
post #99 of 567
10/15/07 at 4:27am
Quote:
Originally Posted by MmeMuffin View Post
I
Alex has seen way, way worse.... For example, the week that we started dating, I had just got my first Keeper (reusable menstrual cup). I didn't have my period and figured I'd try inserting it as a "dry run" so I wouldn't be bleeding the first time I tried it. Sure enough, it got stuck way up there somehow, and though I tried every tip I had heard of, I could not for the life of me get it out! Alex came over, and I was clearly upset, and didn't know what to do, so he managed to get me to explain the situation, and calmly offered to pull it out. My hero! Actually, I forgot to tell him I wasn't having my period, and he suggested he'd do it assuming that I was menstruating.

This is priceless!!! It also reminds me of how when I was in college and dating my ex-boyfriend. We had just DTD-and used the Sponge for birth control (remember Elaine from Seinfeld???). He proved his Spongworthiness because it got stuck-we then spent the next 30 minutes trying to get this thing out! It was quite a site-I was lying on my back-and he was there with his hand up my vajajay-I was freaking out afraid that we would not be able to get it out! BTW-I probably fall into the skanky ho category too!
post #100 of 567
10/15/07 at 8:35am
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluesymama View Post
You should have seen him with his legs all up in the air- I was cracking up! being a Mama in the woods, I've seen my share of ticks, so it was no big deal for me- but I doubt he saw it that way! The poor guy was nearly passing out from his fear! (having a tick phobia and a girl he barely knew with tweezers up in his business...pretty nerve wracking!)
Quite an ice breaker, I tell ya'!
(And goodness- if you're a skanky ho then so am I!
OH MY LORD. I am weeping with laughter.

Quote:
Originally Posted by expectantmami View Post
He proved his Spongworthiness because it got stuck-we then spent the next 30 minutes trying to get this thing out! It was quite a site-I was lying on my back-and he was there with his hand up my vajajay-I was freaking out afraid that we would not be able to get it out! BTW-I probably fall into the skanky ho category too!
I remember that from Seinfeld! Oh man, the weird things that have happened that a lot of people in our lives probably don't know... I mean, I don't know how many people know about your sponge situation or bluesymama's tick situation, but I'll tell you that certainly not a fat lot of people know about my Keeper situation. Makes you wonder what kind of weird TMI everyone else has been through....

And I'm glad I'm not the only skanky ho. When the hubs and I "started dating" I kind of mean "started sleeping together." I mean, our anniversary is the day we first had sex, 'cause we didn't really waste much time. Before then, there was tension. Then some sex, and boom we were together.
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