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August Mama's...thread number 5 - Page 6

post #101 of 113
Skye's Mama -- OMG twins!! How exciting. Its great that your OB is willing to work with you on a natural birth.

Sharon -- I had the same giddy feeling this morning. Between reaching term yesterday and knowing today is August woo hoo. It sounds like your family does need a few more girls though

Wooby -- I can't wait to hear all the birth stories. This is so exciting that they are starting to come now.

Pavlina -- That is very weird about your midwife. Hopefully you won't still feel the negative feeling as you get closer to birht.

Dream Weaver -- So you get to read all our experiences and learn from us before your time comes.. its got some advantages too and it'll go by quickly.

mpls_momma-- Thats funny. Having a boy can be less worries. My co-worker is having a boy aswell and he always says with a boy you only have to worry about your boy but with a girl you have to worry about all boys :

Chanley -- I've really been struggling with food to. I just can't eat much of anything.
post #102 of 113
Thread Starter 
Before I go into my appointment today. I forgot to mention that I am having an ultrasound done again on Monday and they want to recheck the weight along with a complete biophysical. They say they want to verify once again that the baby is not too big for a VBAC. I want to say so if they are different results, what test is wrong? Is that riduculous or what?

Today I had a horrible appointment. I started with a non stress test and it was perfect and my blood pressure was 140/90 which has been quite consistent. I started off by asking, is it okay if I go to Camp Snoopy tonight? And the midwife, Lisa said, "Absolutely not." What you need to be doing tonight is have that baby. I said, "Why, I am not going to go on rides and I will be sitting and watching mostly?" And Lisa said, "No it is too much stimulation and too much walking for you and we need to be having this baby soon and possibly talking about an induction. I said, "My due date is not until next Friday and my ultrasound was 8 out of 8 out on Monday and my non stress was good today." And she said, "Kathy your placenta has known for quite a few weeks that your blood pressure has been high." Then Lisa asked if I would be willing to have some blood work done (which would be my third time) and I said yes and then she said what about a 24 hour urine test and I said, "When would you get the blood results back?" And she said, "Monday, unless you go over to the hospital lab now, we can get the results in an hour." I said, "I just had the test 9 days ago and everything was fine, do you really think I need it and she said yes." I said, "Okay I will do the blood work but I do not want to do the urine test as of now." And then I said, "When you are talking induction, what are you talking and she said, "Gels." And I said, "But aren't they no good for vbacs cuz of uterine rupture and she said, "People still use them." Anyway I went over to the hospital to the 4th floor, I thought she said 4th floor and ended going through the neonatal area and saw a really sick baby with a family that was crying and I started crying. And thought I am such a fool to risk all of this and not being willing to cooperate with their urine tests and wanting to go to camp snoopy.

I left quite sad. I went and had a quick lunch and as I was driving home, Ann the other midwife called me with the blood work results and everything was fine. I said, "Ann, I am pretty bummed out right now, I don't know if you are being overly cautious or if you are really concerned. But I feel that everytime I come in it seems like you have nothing good to say. (which by the way, my edema is not even a one and my reflexes are fine) and she said, well your ultrasound and your non stress test today show a perfect baby and we want to keep everything that way so you should really continue to rest. I said, "I am confused that Lisa mentioned gels when those are not recommended for vbacs and she said, "Well sometimes people forget." Anyway she told me that maybe I should talk to a therapist to sort out these feelings and sadness around not having the last few weeks as joyous as I wanted.

Anyway after I got home I paged in to ask more questions. I talked to Ann and I said, "Ann a few weeks ago I asked you how high my blood pressure would have to go before you would talk induction or hospitalization and you said, "Before induction, you would do a magnesium drip which is no fun." And then today we are talking induction and my blood pressure has remained steady and my tests have all been good." And she said, "Kathy we may be at the point where your baby and your health are best for the baby to be outside of your body." I said, "Ann when I asked you about the gels earlier, you said sometimes the midwives forget." Ann said, "yes they forget that they are meeting with a client who has had a previous c-section." I said, "Ann I brought up the safety of gels for VBACs to Lisa and she did not seem concerned about them." And Ann said, "Kathy our practice does not use gels for VBAC moms." So there is another one of their double messages, makes my trust go way down!! She said that they would use pitocin but if your cervix is not favorable, it probably would not work. So then I said, "Ann can we just table this induction conversation until next week?" And she said, "Let me talk to the OB's, they are all in surgery right now and I will call you back." Yes they are in surgery with all the pitocin inductions they used today. Tee hee.

I am so confused? Am I in denial? I was excited about the VBAC etc. for the last few days, feeling really positive and hopeful and now they have me worried and sad. And I feel like I have to be treating myself as sick and not go have fun with my husband and son when last Sunday another midwife said I could just so I rest the rest of the day. What I don't get is they say rest and then they make me hang out there for 4 hours. I really would appreciate your thoughts and feedback.

Ann just called back and said the ob is not overly concerned even though my blood pressure was up a bit and I said, no it wasn't and she said yes 148/90 and then I said, "Ann it was written down wrong, cuz the first reading was 140/90 and the second was 135/89. So that is it for now.
post #103 of 113
Geez Kathy Jo, sounds like you're getting the runaround. I felt that way too earlier this week when "they " made me go in to sign the vbac consent forms. I started feeling like maybe I wasn't making the best choices for my baby. I'm over that now. You need to get your belief in yourself and your baby back where they need to be. Nearly all doctors and medwives believe birth is a dangerous, complicated undertaking. One in which they need to induce, manage, control, all the while CTA. It's in THEIR best interest for you to induce and "get the baby out", not necessarily yours. They know how to prey on your fears, I think it's an actual class in med school. You've done enough testing to know that you're o.k., and your baby is o.k. Try to let go of the worry. Vent to your doula, or to anyone(all of us online ) who believe in safe, natural birth.

In fact, I have one little vent left in me from my session in hell with that stupid ob. She told me how horribly insafe it is for me to refuse continuous efm. How my baby is at high risk of neurological damage, and me of totally rupturing and dieing, yadda yadda yadda.. Anyway, my big thought is..If efm(which is highly subject to interpretation and in numerous studies has been proven to not increase the well-being of the baby) is the only way these clowns can determine the state of the mother or baby, what use are ob's? Are they really that unknowledgable about birth, that their only clue to what's going on with the baby is an inept piece of machinery? My.. what a sad state of affairs for everyone. Why even have ob's? Any surgeon can do a decent c-sec. Pediatricians and neonatologists handle routine and not so routine baby care. Shouldn't we just hire graduates from Devry or whatever tech school is teaching the computer geeks of the future? Who really needs them? O.k. see? I feel better already.

Kathy, I hope you feel better too. Trust your instincts.
post #104 of 113
Kathy-jo, what a yucky yucky day for you! But I agree with Luckymomma, let out all your frustrations and then trust your instincts. It sounds like you have a good grasp on what you want and what feels right. Stick with it and remember that YOU are the one who makes all the final decisions about your body and your baby. Do you have a doula or someone else who knows a lot about birth that can really advocate for you once you do go into labor?

Pavlina, here's to your midwife pulling herself together so she can support you well during your birth!!! What completely frustrating visits! In a way, it might be good for her to read this and realize that she is being unreasonable!

Chanley, I'm eating lots of fruit but everything else sounds pretty blah. I'm still hungry so I'm eating lots, but it's just not fun and I sometimes need to force myself to eat.
post #105 of 113
Thread Starter 
I went to the Mall of America and we did Underwater World and then I went and sat in a comfy chair at starbucks while dh and ds went to Camp Snoopy. I sat and drank raspberry leaf tea with my feet up and then it occured to me to call my accupuncturist who I have not seen in 3 years to see if she can induce me and help with my blood pressure. YEA! And maybe dh and I can you know what.
post #106 of 113

hey guys

kj - will talk to you on messenger, but this really sucks. i do'nt understand your midwife and what she'd doing/thinking. you CAN and WILL vbac. going back to talk to you now.

glad to hear everyone else is doign/feeling well. i guess i really don't belong on this thread anymore, but i need to check in on ya'all and see when the babies are coming.

i'm tired, still sore and having trouble sitting. lol. but so happy. Roman is a wonderful baby , smiles in his sleep, nurses like a champ and makes the cutest squeaks. lol
post #107 of 113

I am so sorry that you had such a crummy prenatal. It sounds as though you and your baby are very healthy, you have done a ton of tests to prove that, your docs/mw are just covering themselves... TRUST YOUR HEART! You know you can do this! They know you can do this! We know you can do this!

Try not to let misinformation and miscommunication (we do/do not use gels on vbacs, incorrect charting of your bp) affect your plans for this birth. Your caregivers may not have it all together, but YOU DO!

I hate that you had to see a struggling family with a poor poor sick baby in NICU. That won't be you! Your baby sounds super and you are full term anyway... I don't think you are putting yourself or your precious baby at risk.

I hope you got some sleep tonight.

Sounds as though your midwife has you doubting her as well. That is no fun this late in the game! Or at any point for that matter. However, it sounds as though you have faith that she will pull it all together for your birth.

Colorful Mama,
So good to hear from you! You are one of our veteran Aug mamas and hearing from you reminds us of the precious gift we are so close to getting!
post #108 of 113
Originally posted by skye's mama

This week I have been reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth which just came out this year. It has birth stories in the first half, like Spiritual Midwifery. (The language seems a bit more mainstream for those put off by the hippy style of Spiritual Midwifery.) The second half has some really great insights on the mind/body connection during labor and birth. The chapter I really loved was 'Sphincter Law': lots of really helpful ideas about how to relax and open up during labor.

ITA skye's mama- this book has made me feel a lot more relaxed about the labor, and the chapter about Sphincter Law is AMAZING. I recommend you all to read this whilst waiting for your little ones.
post #109 of 113
KJ -- I'm so sorry about your visit. I think I'd be feeling a lot of your feelings but what really struck me in your post was the lack of communication going on there. YOu have 1 person telling you one thing and another telling you another thing. No wonder your feeling frustrated. You've gotten some great advice here from people. You have to trust in yourself. Also you may want to be sure that your records are accurate. If she wrote down the wrong bloodpressure what other errors could there be. I know this was a big issue for me when I got my records from my OB when transfering. There were tons of errors in there.
post #110 of 113
Checking in after several days off line....wow, alot has been going on with every one!!!!
Congrats to the new mommas!!!!!!!!
Last night was my last day at work, all my coworkers gave me a surprise card shower and potluck! very cool.....it really was super cool.
It helped make up for the crappy prenatal appt. yesterday morning....my midwife wanted me to have another US to check the babies growth (still only "barely measuring 35cm", despite being 39+weeks), and a nonstress test. I agreed to the NST, but had to insist on waiting until Mon for the US....NST was fine.
Hopefully I'll just have the baby this weekend!
Happy nesting!!!!
post #111 of 113
Thread Starter 
I started a new thread for us.

come and post away.
post #112 of 113

getting closer...

Hi mamas- I haven't posted here in a while. I'm getting excited, but...

planning a homebirth, and unfortunately lately I heard a really sad story, of course I don't know all of the facts, but from what I gather, the mother was going just fine, everything seemed fine at the home birth, all fetal monitoring was good, etc. and the baby came out and just didn't look right. This baby didn't make it and was my midwife's case. It's the first time this has happened to her in 20 years.

They rushed to the hospital but to no avail, the baby couldn't be resusitated.

So, I think to myself, "what if..." what if I'm that rare case of a prolapsed cord or of something else that if you're in the hospital can truly be taken care of right away?

I live only 10 minutes from the hospital, but those 10 minutes could be crucial.

I could still have my midwife in this nearby hospital, since she also does deliveries there, but no labor tub, no relaxed home environment...
post #113 of 113
Thread Starter 
rachelmommy don't know if you noticed but we have a new thread

also was hoping to find out your official due date.

sad story, hang in there
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