Oh girls!

[Hippiemommie]

Background is that I was induced with DS at 40w1d because they though he was over 12 lbs and ended up with a c-section because I wouldn't progress past 7. So this time we are doing a home birth. The midwives have been real laid back. Last month I told them I didn't want any internal exams because basically they make me feel like shit and they don't tell you anything. They know that my Mom carried for 42 weeks with myself and my brother before being induced and this is common in my family. By my LMP I was due Oct 1st but I have 30 day cycles and we are almost positive we conceived on MLK day which would put our due date on Oct 8th. No biggie. Well, today the midwives come and say they were in Chattanooga yesterday and their Dr backup isn't doing VBACs anymore and that even the midwives in the area aren't doing VBACs anymore. That soon NO ONE in TN will be doing VBACs. They want to know what my plan is. Then they start talking about how they are NOW going by Oct 1st as my due date and they want to do an NST today. They said that they are worried about protecting themselves if something happened to me or the baby. That us coming into the hospital would put their RN license in jeopardy and possible CPS could be called if something happened to the baby. So they have me all stressed out. I told them I'm not doing internals (I think they would strip my membranes) and I'm not doing the NST test today. I called my friend who works as an RN at Erlanger hossy in Chatt and she said "bull" everyone is still doing VBACs there. DH is super mad that they are pulling this stuff at the end of the pregnancy and I'm feeling stressed about it. I feel like I'm doing the right thing and I'm not going to be pushed into anything I'm not comfortable with. However, I'm not sure I'm even comfortable with these midwives anymore. What do y'all think?

[hetaera]

I cant stand how many people get the 'bait and switch'
it makes NO sense, especially coming from midwives. Have some faith in the procsess and womans bodies wont you!?

I am sorry you have to deal with this. Do what you can to protect yourself and your baby from anything you think is unnecessary and big hugs.

[Dena]

Originally Posted by hetaera

I cant stand how many people get the 'bait and switch'
it makes NO sense, especially coming from midwives. Have some faith in the procsess and womans bodies wont you!?

I am sorry you have to deal with this. Do what you can to protect yourself and your baby from anything you think is unnecessary and big hugs.

:

Saw a great quote today: "There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women." Madeline Albright

[gypsyfaery]

Yah, I am baffled by all these stories of non-supportive MW too! Doesn't go against the whole philosophy?:

I say trust your instincts, your body and yourself. You have to be comfortable with your pregnancy, labour and support to have the positive experience you deserve. Be strong!

[naturalthinker]

Wow, what hell. Def. go with your instincts - how do you feel about unassisted? there aren't laws that say we need to birth in a certain way by a certain time is there - it is just a 'fear based' system, right? Try to not listen to other people's fears (or threats) but your own intuition and know that there is safety in that. Good luck with this nightmare! You'll be in my thoughts.

[Patchfire]

Not in your DDC, but this caught my eye for several reasons. I grew up in Chattanooga and live in ATL now - do your midwives live near Atlanta? If so, I know who they are, and I would say... well, that I would never recommend them, from everything I have heard. A friend of mine was transferred for essentially No Good Reason in June, and that's one of hte more benign things that I have heard.

If nothing else, there are people doing VBACs in TN - Ina May is in TN. Not that you want to drive that far in labor, but!

These particular midwives - if they are who I think they are - apparently had a stillbirth in May or June that has made them even *more* CYA than they were before.

Listen to your instincts. If you aren't comfortable with them anymore, then don't do it! I've just seen too many stories about these...

[kleines]

What is the deal with these MWs doing this crap lately? Seriously. I agree with PPs though, do what you feel comfortable with. I also agree with the Madeline Albright quote, that is a great one!

[wildgarden]

Wow, another one...another just-before-the-end-of-pregnancy-bomb from the care providers. I am so sorry you are dealing with this.

[Hippiemommie]

Thanks for the support everyone. As you can see I'm up at 6am almost in tears over this. After thinking about it EVERY waking moment since yesterday morning I don't see how I can continue letting these midwives attend me. I can't even sleep. I'm calling them in the morning (after I call a Chatt midwife) and I'm going to tell them exactly what I think. I feel like since yesterday my body is tense and holding my son in now. I'm very torn up over this and pissed. VERY pissed. H is also extremely mad. Just keep me in your thoughts. I'm on the search for someone else.

[roostery]

I hope you get some new and more supportive midwives. Stress is not what a mama needs in her last few weeks!

[aylaanne]

Originally Posted by Dena

Saw a great quote today: "There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women." Madeline Albright

OMG I love that quote. Women do sh*t like this to each other ALL THE TIME. I don't know why some people think the world would be better if women ran it, I think it would be just as bad, we just wouldn't talk about it. At least, not in public.

Anyways, I'm sorry this is happening to you. I agree that calling them up and telling them exactly how you feel is a fabulous idea. Do what feels right to you, and try and relax and let things happen. Hopefully things will work themselves out. Keep us posted!

[stacey2061]

Extra big hugs from me! I totally feel your pain, right down to nobody listening to you on your EDD. Take care and keep standing up for yourself.

[Banana731]

I am so sorry, that's awful. I hope you find a new MW, please keep us posted!