I was kicked out of a store for nursing in the dressing room!!!! - Page 3

[milkmamma]

Originally Posted by MilkTrance

It's an assumption to state that it would take 20 minutes. Sometimes all my DS needs is a 5-minute "fix" so we can get from one place to another where I can feed him more comfortably.

Also, I happen to take a LONG time trying on clothes. I am picky. No one has ever rushed ME, no matter WHAT my reasoning for taking a long time.

I think it most definitely has to do with a prejudice against BF.

I was going to type that! Usually my ds just needs a little slug and then he is back to lala land and I can finish shopping.

I'd like to think that if this had happened to me I would have said, "I'll be out as soon as I am done soothing my baby and am able to dress, we'll discuss your issues with breastfeeding when I am done." I tend to be a little bit of a brat when it comes to people telling me I can't do things. Sucks that anyone would have to stand up for their right to sooth and feed their child.

I was going to email the store but they don't have a link to email on their page. I was thinking maybe I'll mail her the breastfeeding symbol to put in her window.

[Love_My_Bubba]

Originally Posted by milkmamma

I was going to email the store but they don't have a link to email on their page. I was thinking maybe I'll mail her the breastfeeding symbol to put in her window.

That's actually a great idea! What if we all printed off the BF symbol with a little note and stuck it in the mail to the store? It could be like a little virtual nurse-in and no one has to know about it except the owners and us. They would really understand that women all across the country know how unfriendly they are and are telling all of our friends to never shop there should they be in the area. Maybe then they will understand that treating one local woman unfairly has nationwide consequences. Anyone have comments, concerns, suggestions??

[captain optimism]

Originally Posted by angelcat

If my baby had needed a bottle, (or nurse if I'd been able to) and I was in the middle of trying on clothes, I'd get dressed and go feed her. I wouldn't tie up a dressing room for 20 minutes. If itwas something that'd only take a moment or 2, no problem, otherwise, it's a changing room, not a baby lounge.

See, this is where we get our understanding of nursing in public as a feminist issue. If you have to get up and move somewhere else, no matter how you are feeding a baby, because babies are a nuisance (even fed with a bottle) and breasts are nudity--then mothers of young children are essentially restricted in our ability to move around.

Advocacy for breastfeeding is advocacy for women as mothers. Babies aren't inconvenient distractions from real life--babies are one of the central points of our existence as human beings. This isn't about being an entitled brat who thinks her own offspring is the most important thing--this is about refocusing the energy of the entire society on the things that are important to us as a class, as women and mothers.

When you say, "Well, I wouldn't be as inconvenient to the owners of that store as this mother was"--you miss the point. The point is that we should all be able to go out in public with babies, like normal human beings, and feed them like normal human beings--when they need to eat, with breasts, the normal way. I'm desperately sorry for people who were unable to nurse, but you know what? I feel like this is advocacy for you, too, because no matter what you're using to feed a baby this is about you.

[astrophe27]

What abotu getting your story to the Orlando Sentinel? THey have a parenting blog that might cover it.

http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/fea...arenting_blog/

A.

[readytobedone]

for those saying it's not about nursing, it's about taking up space/time in the dressing room...how about this?

if you had to go take a pee in the middle of shopping and had a dressing room, chances are the store people would let you go pee and come back without emptying out your stall to give to the next person. heck, if this mama had said "i need to leave to feed my baby, but i'll be right back," this owner would probably have allowed her to keep her stuff in it and come back to try on.

it was definitely about nursing. not time spent in the dressing room. i've left and come back to dressing rooms to go do all kinds of things (including going back out into the store to find more stuff to try on), and no one has ever accused me of taking too long.

[MamaBear1976]

Originally Posted by captain optimism

See, this is where we get our understanding of nursing in public as a feminist issue. If you have to get up and move somewhere else, no matter how you are feeding a baby, because babies are a nuisance (even fed with a bottle) and breasts are nudity--then mothers of young children are essentially restricted in our ability to move around.

Advocacy for breastfeeding is advocacy for women as mothers. Babies aren't inconvenient distractions from real life--babies are one of the central points of our existence as human beings. This isn't about being an entitled brat who thinks her own offspring is the most important thing--this is about refocusing the energy of the entire society on the things that are important to us as a class, as women and mothers.

When you say, "Well, I wouldn't be as inconvenient to the owners of that store as this mother was"--you miss the point. The point is that we should all be able to go out in public with babies, like normal human beings, and feed them like normal human beings--when they need to eat, with breasts, the normal way. I'm desperately sorry for people who were unable to nurse, but you know what? I feel like this is advocacy for you, too, because no matter what you're using to feed a baby this is about you.

:

I couldn't have said it better.

[sophiekat]

Originally Posted by captain optimism

See, this is where we get our understanding of nursing in public as a feminist issue. If you have to get up and move somewhere else, no matter how you are feeding a baby, because babies are a nuisance (even fed with a bottle) and breasts are nudity--then mothers of young children are essentially restricted in our ability to move around.

Advocacy for breastfeeding is advocacy for women as mothers. Babies aren't inconvenient distractions from real life--babies are one of the central points of our existence as human beings. This isn't about being an entitled brat who thinks her own offspring is the most important thing--this is about refocusing the energy of the entire society on the things that are important to us as a class, as women and mothers.

When you say, "Well, I wouldn't be as inconvenient to the owners of that store as this mother was"--you miss the point. The point is that we should all be able to go out in public with babies, like normal human beings, and feed them like normal human beings--when they need to eat, with breasts, the normal way. I'm desperately sorry for people who were unable to nurse, but you know what? I feel like this is advocacy for you, too, because no matter what you're using to feed a baby this is about you.

[angelcat]

Originally Posted by captain optimism

See, this is where we get our understanding of nursing in public as a feminist issue. If you have to get up and move somewhere else, no matter how you are feeding a baby, because babies are a nuisance (even fed with a bottle) and breasts are nudity--then mothers of young children are essentially restricted in our ability to move around.

Advocacy for breastfeeding is advocacy for women as mothers. Babies aren't inconvenient distractions from real life--babies are one of the central points of our existence as human beings. This isn't about being an entitled brat who thinks her own offspring is the most important thing--this is about refocusing the energy of the entire society on the things that are important to us as a class, as women and mothers.

When you say, "Well, I wouldn't be as inconvenient to the owners of that store as this mother was"--you miss the point. The point is that we should all be able to go out in public with babies, like normal human beings, and feed them like normal human beings--when they need to eat, with breasts, the normal way. I'm desperately sorry for people who were unable to nurse, but you know what? I feel like this is advocacy for you, too, because no matter what you're using to feed a baby this is about you.

Hmm. That is actually a good post. I just still feel like I should do everything I can not to be rude/get in poeple's way etc.

[captain optimism]

Originally Posted by angelcat

Hmm. That is actually a good post. I just still feel like I should do everything I can not to be rude/get in poeple's way etc.

I know.

We all have to pick our battles when it comes to this stuff. It's tough to face social disapproval for this really important work of taking care of a small baby. You have to decide when to face it down, and when to go with the flow.

Which is why it helps to have other women willing to do it with you.

[eepster]

I always have to feed DS if I'm trying on clothing. He gets all excited everytime I lift my shirt.

[moonfirefaery]

What about other people taking reasonable measures to not be rude to your baby and get in the way of her having a healthy meal? To me, feeding my hungry, screaming baby is a lot more important than getting in the way of someone trying on a new skirt.

[DreamsInDigital]

Originally Posted by eepster

I always have to feed DS if I'm trying on clothing. He gets all excited everytime I lift my shirt.

ROFL my DD is like that too. I nursed her in the dressing room at this store called Forever 21 and nobody said anything to me, and the girl even gave me the big changing room so I had more space.

To the OP: I seriously think you need to make a big deal about this and make sure to demand a public apology from the owner.

[cycle]

OP, I really agree with the pps who have said you should take this higher, with a nurse-in, contact the new, file a complaint. I'm really sorry you were treated that way!

I looked on their website and although their (the owners, Robin & John) email addresses are not on their, there is an email adress of a manager at their other store. The naming convention for the email address is [e-mail]. That means that the owner's email address would be [e-mail]. If not the manager at their other store in Orlando is [e-mail]. If he were bombarded with emails he would surely forward them.:

[Milkymommi]

Originally Posted by lacysmommy

Interesting... you're not the only one with a bad experience from the owners! http://orlando.citysearch.com/profil...othing_co.html

Interesting... OP should definitely post something there as well

Why can't these things ever happen to me? I swear, I've been prepared for years with all kinds of responses etc. and .... nothing.

Really though, so sorry this has happened to you mama. I'll keep up on the thread and help out with whatever I can to make a difference. BTW I LOVE the idea about mass mailing the National BFing symbol !! If we could get enough mamas to do it I think it would speak volumes.

[crazyrunningmama]

Originally Posted by eepster

I always have to feed DS if I'm trying on clothing. He gets all excited everytime I lift my shirt.

ME too!! I wonder what that cranky store owner would think of the noises that would come out of my change room if I didn't nurse when DD sees my breasts - MmmmmMMMMM ah ah ah (mouth wide open) MMMmmmmmmmmMMMMm mama MAMA! MAMA!! Mmmm aH AH AH!)

[wannabe]

I have to be the dissenting voice here. She has no obligation to let you use her changing room to breastfeed in - you could tie it up for an hour while she has customers walking out in annoyance. It's for trying on clothes, not feeding children. people need the change rooms to try stuff on, you don't need to be in there while your kid eats.

yes, she could have been more understanding since you were half naked, but sitting on the chairs outside the dressing room or on the floor by the cash register while you BF doesn't keep her other customers from trying things on.

[MilkTrance]

Originally Posted by captain optimism

See, this is where we get our understanding of nursing in public as a feminist issue. If you have to get up and move somewhere else, no matter how you are feeding a baby, because babies are a nuisance (even fed with a bottle) and breasts are nudity--then mothers of young children are essentially restricted in our ability to move around.

Advocacy for breastfeeding is advocacy for women as mothers. Babies aren't inconvenient distractions from real life--babies are one of the central points of our existence as human beings. This isn't about being an entitled brat who thinks her own offspring is the most important thing--this is about refocusing the energy of the entire society on the things that are important to us as a class, as women and mothers.

When you say, "Well, I wouldn't be as inconvenient to the owners of that store as this mother was"--you miss the point. The point is that we should all be able to go out in public with babies, like normal human beings, and feed them like normal human beings--when they need to eat, with breasts, the normal way. I'm desperately sorry for people who were unable to nurse, but you know what? I feel like this is advocacy for you, too, because no matter what you're using to feed a baby this is about you.

:

I've become MORE feminist after having a baby.

I now see just how anti-family, anti-woman the world really is.

[Guava~Lush]

Originally Posted by wannabe

I have to be the dissenting voice here. She has no obligation to let you use her changing room to breastfeed in - you could tie it up for an hour while she has customers walking out in annoyance. It's for trying on clothes, not feeding children. people need the change rooms to try stuff on, you don't need to be in there while your kid eats.

yes, she could have been more understanding since you were half naked, but sitting on the chairs outside the dressing room or on the floor by the cash register while you BF doesn't keep her other customers from trying things on.

sorry, but are you saying she should be sitting on the floor bf her baby? I must have read that wrong. And she was trying on the clothes, and has the legal right to feed her child. anywhere. As stated previously several times, it does not take an hour to bf a baby, and some people take that long trying on stuff. I guess thats ok, but if you try on clothes and pop the kid on the boob for a few minutes, well that's just inconvienient for others.

[Momtwice]

Originally Posted by angelcat

I just still feel like I should do everything I can not to be rude/get in poeple's way etc.

If only the store employee felt the same way.

[Emmeline II]

Originally Posted by wannabe

yes, she could have been more understanding since you were half naked, but sitting on the chairs outside the dressing room or on the floor by the cash register while you BF doesn't keep her other customers from trying things on.

Neither does an empty store...there was no other customers to inconvience (as if it matters). She was also offered the bathroom, not chair outside the dressingroom. In anycase, HOW did the manager KNOW she was nursing?

I am a VERY slow shopper and my non-nursing ds makes that process even slower, much slower than stopping to nurse dd.