Do you Cover up when NIP? - Page 5

[thismama]

Originally Posted by transformed

Thats what it sounds like!

To you. Never neglect to notice the filter.

[the_lissa]

How does one be a total ass while nursing in public? : Anyone is entitled to any opinion they want. They are not entitled to respect for their opinion.

Anti nip attitudes are misogynistic. I do not respect that just like I don't respect racism, classism, etc.

[iamama]

I bring a red pop up tent everywhere I go with "warning breastfeeding" spraypainted (by dh) on all sides...works for me.

[carriebft]

Quote by transformed:

I dont think you should change your nursing style, I also don tthink you should cover up. But I do think alot of bf'ers could be a little bit more compassionate towards people who dont understand and mabye try changing their poor attitudes instead of feeling "wronged" all the time.

can you provide evidence to back up your assumptions that "alot" of breastfeeders are not compassionate enough and feel "wronged" all the time without following that with an attempt to change attitudes?

I see just the opposite. Women nurse in public, are discriminated against, and act to change what happened. (whether with words or letters or just the simple act of continuing to nurse)

Others just simply dont say or do ANYTHING-- thus, they are neither lacking in compassion or guilty of "feeling wronged all the time."

[carriebft]

Originally Posted by thismama

Oh yeah, coz I know soooo many hostile nursing mothers with bad attitudes. We just sit around nursing our babes and scowling at passers-by. :

I think this false assumption that so many people have (that there exists this large group of hostile breastfeeding moms just waiting to snap at you) has been perpetuated by anti breastfeeding groups.

And when people, such as those in this thread who think this fictionally large group exists, spread the myth along, THEY are the ones hurting the cause.

For example, recently with the Applebee's discrimination of a nursing mom. She had the laws for her state in her purse and showed them to the manager when he threatened her with having to leave. Comments to the story pointed this out and said she was hostile and had an agenda. It's people like that, who spread the myth and incriminate breastfeeding mothers, who hurt the cause.

[mamajama]

OK, Iv'e been facetious on this thread. What I really do (although, iamama, the pup-tent is a grand idea!!) is I wear a big poncho and I carry sawed-off shotguns underneath. If anyone so much as looks at me sideways it's goodnight charlie.

Seriously, I can't believe nursing mothers are asked to 'be more compassionate" of annoyed strangers. Where does compassion fit into this exactly? I think nursing a child is one of the greatest acts of selflessness if a woman makes that choice. It is completely misogynistic to give women a hard time for it. Or to act as if it's something dirty that should be hidden away. My boobs are just flesh-covered orbs that deliver milk to my child when I'm lactating. My entire body is sensual at times and I'm not about to cover that up lest I should offend someone with my sensual hotness. So if they can't handle seeing 2 inches of flesh that happens to be close to my nipple and raise a stink about it, they'll require compassionate care when I'm through with them. Don't worry transformed, I'm kidding. (sort of)

[carriebft]

[bellabear]

Nope My dd's 2 1/2, I'm discreet, but don't cover up.

[thismama]

I honestly do worry about discreet, (like I'm careful too much of my tittie isn't sticking out), but damn I resent that. Like, it's a child sucking on a boob. What is soooo offensive about that? I find I get pissed that I have to be inhibited, and pass on those inhibitions to my daughter (in the form of "Dont lift up mama's shirt! No, I'll nurse you when we get home") to prevent us both having to deal with unfounded social BS.

[nylecoj]

Originally Posted by miche28

I think this issue is more about the whole "BF, but be discreet" thing which really imposes anti-BF/anti-woman/anti-mothering judgements on women in the guise of politeness. As you soon as you 'require' discretion, you leave discretion in the eye of the observer, who isn't always a friendly party.

Frankly, I think most mothers would prefer not to expose their breasts and bellies (most not all), but also that their baby's hunger trumps that preference. Most people also prefer not to make others uncomfortable, but I'm not going to make my child uncomfortable because of ill-placed prudishness.

So, no, I don't think a mother should give a sh** and I think that's the healthiest approach. I don't think that it hurts the cause - it says my child's needs trump my preference for modesty and your hang-ups.

ITA.

I don't set out to upset people or make them uncomfortable, and I certainly don't want my belly jiggle flopping all over the place for everyone to see, but when it comes down to it I feel it is far more important to meet my child's needs.

And as I said before, if you don't like it, don't look.

It's sad that anyone would think that NIP hurts the bfing cause. It's a perfectly natural thing to do and as several other people have mentioned it is not up to the mother to make society comfortable. The mother's job is to meet her child's needs, and if in doing so other people are uncomfortable, then so be it.

[nylecoj]

Originally Posted by mamajama

guerrilla nursing.

Haha! Totally.

Look at me wrong and I will kick your ass WHILE I nurse my child!

[CarsonBookworm]

Normally....I don't cover up.
I did once when visiting a friend of mine whose toddler kept trying to grab my breasts. Nothing the Mama did could get the child to stop the behavior, so I covered up and *bam* the child became disinterested.

[georgia]

Here is an awesome Mothering articles about breastfeeding in public by Peggy O'Mara, here.

In many ways, it is ludicrous to even discuss modesty in the context of breastfeeding when scanty women's clothing is so well tolerated in the media, at the workplace, and in public on most other occasions. It is obvious, then, that this argument is a foil for those who are uncomfortable seeing a woman breastfeed in public because they are underexposed to breastfeeding in general. And it is further evidence of prejudice toward women, unfortunately, among women.

[miche28]

Originally Posted by transformed

Women who prefer to be modest are NOT anti-bf. That is an absolutley rediculous statment.

Sorry - that's not what I meant. I would put myself in the actegory of mothers who prefer to be discreet. But I think that individuals who say that women can NIP AS LONG AS they are being discreet are anti-BF/anti-woman as they put the responsibility for the problem on the mother, not where it should be.

[MilkTrance]

Originally Posted by BetsyS

If you were my SIL, you would think I was secretive as well. Having a baby and getting to escape frequently from family gatherings is the best thing I ever did. When my FIL starts getting on my nerves (which is frequent ), oh, wow, the baby is suddenly hungry. And, it takes him forever to nurse. :

I'm not like that all the time. I just reserve the escaping into the bedroom for my inlaws. LOL

OMG me too! This is just about the only place I WANT to NOT NIP!

[Simplicity]

Never have with my daughter.

With my son I did 13 years ago, I was 20 and didn't know anyone who breastfed. I did it but I was uncomfortable without covering up.

[eclipse]

nope

[MotheringHeart]

When I was nursing #1 I was obsessive about being covered. Now I'm on #4 and I don't give a hoot who sees or who gets upset. I try very hard to not expose my breast/nipple/yummy stretched out-fat rollish tummy, but if they accidentally get exposed to the world - oh well. It is just skin after all. I have a hard time w/people who accuse breastfeeding moms who don't cover of being unmodest or crazy lactivists. Breastfeeding under a cover is dang hard and sometimes babes refuse to do it under there. Breasts are totally normal, natural things and what a babe does with breasts is a totally normal, natural thing. I don't think I should have to cover it up. (And if anyone brings up using the restroom as an argument for covering up natural functions, I'll tell them that I think our fascination w/keeping that a secret and making it seem disgusting is ridiculous!)

AND

100% of the people IN THE WORLD are naked under their clothes!!!!

(ps i have a grand story about a young male lifegaurd at our local community pool who didn't stare AND didn't bat an eye when I was breastfeeding my nursling there last week! yay for him!!)

[goodearthmama]

Originally Posted by transformed

I never even noticed a woman nursing before I started nursing. Then I started seeing them everywhere!

Are you sure people are looking at you and you arent just self concious?

Its hard to tell when someone is nursing.

My ds wouldnt nurse in public much because he was too stimulated by everything else.

Yeah I'm sure. I wasn't the only one who noticed the looks as well as the comment from a preg. lady. And I am not really self concious other than not wanting my belly flap hanging out.

However, I have not ever noticed anyone around me bfing. I live in a state that is so backwards from how I think and Live. This place is so, so unhealthy and poor that it makes me sad that women don't and aren't encouraged to breastfeed. And the general attitude around here is not supportive at all of bfing.

THat being said, (besides meeting my childs needs to nurse) I want to be an example to my friends and my sister and to whatever woman does notice me, that it is okay and is the best thing for my child no matter what anyone else thinks about it. Because that is how it should be, just no big deal...