Like father, not quite like son

[oneboycircus]

My wife (sorry I don't know all the codes yet haha) and I are have our first son soon and we are planning on not circumcising him. I am circumcised (sorry if that's to much information). I am sure I can just tell him if it someday comes up, that lots people have an operation and that is why it looks different, and that would be just fine. I just didn't know if anyone else had gone through this same situation and they handled it.

[Papai]

Originally Posted by oneboycircus

My wife (sorry I don't know all the codes yet haha) and I are have our first son soon and we are planning on not circumcising him. I am circumcised (sorry if that's to much information). I am sure I can just tell him if it someday comes up, that lots people have an operation and that is why it looks different, and that would be just fine. I just didn't know if anyone else had gone through this same situation and they handled it.

The acronyms are a little overwhelming at times aren't they?

I've not been in your situation, I'm intact and my son is intact as well, but I really wouldn't worry about it. Although I knew I was intact and I knew my little brother was, I had no idea about my father's status. It wasn't until I had my son that he told me. So it probably won't even be a big deal. I mean you all won't be having penis show-and-tells anyway. And plus, you'll have more differences than the lack of foreskin between you two. An adult penis is pretty different from a child's.

But KUDOS to you for not circing your son! Good job!

[Dabble]

I'm a mom ... am I allowed in this forum? It's not a boy's only club is it?

Just wanted to put in my two cents -- my DH (dear husband) is circ'd and our 2 year old son is not. If the question ever comes up in the future, we intend to tell our son that the doctors used to think that it was a good idea to remove the foreskin, but not any more.

That's the simple truth, and it helps reaffirm to him that his body is natural, healthy and normal.

Good for you for putting your son first! We need more dads like you out there!

[Rockies5]

another mom here. My husband is circed. two of our three sons are not. It is a NON issue. Seriously, penis comparison between daddies and boys just doesn't happen in healthy homes. The kids know their styles are different, they know what circ is and why we chose to do it to one and not the others, also that daddy is circed as well. It's just everyday, not an issue. So your penises are different is the way we react, so are your noses. He has blond hair and you have brown and dad's is black. It's not a big deal here. It doen't have to be an issue unless you make it one.

I might be able to get my dh on later if you'd rather talk to him He isn't much for online stuff.

[oneboycircus]

Thanks so much of r all the advice. I didn't think it would be much of an issue, I just wasn't sure if anyone had a situation where it was, and how they would have handled it. Kids are pretty easy going.
thanks again!

[s_kristina]

Another mom with an intact son and a circ'd partner. It's very normal for our family to see each other naked and state of penis has never been an issue. If the topic is ever discussed when ds is older it will be a simple matter like the other poster stated. We also have the fact that both my brothers are also intact.

[alevensalor]

Personally, I'm cut and my boy is intact, and I'm looking into restoration. I think that a boy should look like his dad, but not at the cost of mutilating ds.

DW and I talk about this sometimes, and she made a great point, that when it happens to little girls it's called female genital mutilation, and for little boys it's just circumcision.

DS hasn't commented yet, although there have been a couple of funny moments about how he has a small one and "Daddy, you have a BIG penis".

Kids are funny.

~A!

[eclipse]

My oldest son will be 7 in January and hasn't noticed a difference between his penis and my husband's (other than size!)

[Greg B]

I am in exactly your situation, or have been i should say. I am circ'd, and I would not let the Doctors cut my sons. The first really tried, but that is another story....

Anyway, since i was circ'd, and they were not, and because so many pro-circ people seem to make a big deal of this being a problem, my wife and i did discuss and ponder it. In the end, it made no sense at all that it should be a problem any more than the fact that i would be taller, able to walk sooner, have hair on my face, be bald on my head, etc.

Since we are relaxed about nudity, my sons (now 17 & 15) had many opportunities to see me and the difference. It didn't seem to be any bigger an issue for them that the much larger size and hairier look. I told them that i was cut, but they didn't really dwell on it. When they were about 10 & 8 I started restoring. I did nothing to hide that from them, and in fact they see me doing it. No problem, and I think it makes the value of the foreskin more apparent to them.

If someone needs to be like the other, isn't far more appropriate for the father to regrow his foreskin anyway?

Regards

[phatchristy]

A mom here, DH is cut, our son is not.

But, I'm really writing because my father was intact (he's passed on which is why I used the past tense). Well, my mom told me that when my brother was born in the hospital they automatically circ'd him without permission. They were really horrified, and incidentally my brother had a complication...an infection which he had antibiotics for an an infant.

Anyhow, all these years and my brother never knew my dad's status. Apparently my parents didn't want him to be upset by it/know what happened when he was born, so they never discussed it.

So, he managed to grow up not noticing a difference at all apparently.

Though, I wish my parents had told him what happened...my brother went on and had both of us son's cut. I wish I had known about circumcision and the "family secret" back then...but my mom didn't share about it until after my father died.

[Shadow Papa]

Originally Posted by Chimpmandee

I'm a mom ... am I allowed in this forum? It's not a boy's only club is it?

Just wanted to put in my two cents -- my DH (dear husband) is circ'd and our 2 year old son is not. If the question ever comes up in the future, we intend to tell our son that the doctors used to think that it was a good idea to remove the foreskin, but not any more.

That's the simple truth, and it helps reaffirm to him that his body is natural, healthy and normal.

Good for you for putting your son first! We need more dads like you out there!

Mom's are welcome... at least by this papa.

I'm cut, DS is not. DW and I put a good deal of thought into this before he was born. We are planning on using the "natural" explanation and let him know that the body is pretty much perfect naturally... we just have to take care of it.

Originally Posted by Rockies5

another mom here. My husband is circed. two of our three sons are not. It is a NON issue. Seriously, penis comparison between daddies and boys just doesn't happen in healthy homes. The kids know their styles are different, they know what circ is and why we chose to do it to one and not the others, also that daddy is circed as well. It's just everyday, not an issue. So your penises are different is the way we react, so are your noses. He has blond hair and you have brown and dad's is black. It's not a big deal here. It doen't have to be an issue unless you make it one.

I might be able to get my dh on later if you'd rather talk to him He isn't much for online stuff.

Hmmm... I think comparison is healthy and a natural part of growing up. I remember doing it and I know DS recognizes body type at this age and will likely voice questions when he is talking more clearly. I would encourage all papa's to foster healthy relations and interactions with honesty.

Originally Posted by alevensalor

Personally, I'm cut and my boy is intact, and I'm looking into restoration. I think that a boy should look like his dad, but not at the cost of mutilating ds.

DW and I talk about this sometimes, and she made a great point, that when it happens to little girls it's called female genital mutilation, and for little boys it's just circumcision.

DS hasn't commented yet, although there have been a couple of funny moments about how he has a small one and "Daddy, you have a BIG penis".

Kids are funny.

~A!

RESTORATION????? WHAT????

OK... I am very curious about THIS RESTORATION THING! Are you haveing a graft?

How the... What the???? Where is it coming... Huh?:

Sorry... I went under the knife and have always just accepted: "That is that."

Is it just cosmetic or does it start to bring back that lost sensitivity?

Regarding mutilation: Yep... I never thought about until DW asked what I wanted to do with DS. After doing just a little reading I was pretty much with the anti-mutilation camp.

But I had no idea that one could go back.

[alaskaberry]

Hey, another mama here. Just wanted to give kudos to the OP. It's rare to find a dad like that! Good for you! On that note, my ds is not circ'd and neither is my dp (in fact, he was the one who said straight up that none of the men in his family were circ'd and I wasn't going to circ his son. So I researched it, and though my reasons were different than his, it works for us.). So good for you

[Greg B]

Originally Posted by Shadow Papa

RESTORATION????? WHAT????

OK... I am very curious about THIS RESTORATION THING! Are you haveing a graft?

How the... What the???? Where is it coming... Huh?:

Sorry... I went under the knife and have always just accepted: "That is that."

Is it just cosmetic or does it start to bring back that lost sensitivity?

But I had no idea that one could go back.

Yes restoration! It works, and will return a great deal of sensation. From the reports of those who have gone before us, you will look as if you were normal, even to Doctors. But cutting and grafts are not the way to go. It is well understood that that path will only cause more problems.

Instead, the way to restore is to put tension on the skin. This induces cell division. The cell division adds new cells, and you get more foreskin. There are many ways to do this, more important is sticking to it. It takes years to complete, unfortunately. But on the good side, it can be an easy routine part of your day, and you (and your wife) will begin feeling the improvements in as little as a month or two. And the benefits keep coming along the way.

Feel free to pm me if you want more info, better yet, look over the many resources on the web. Lots of information and support available. I am in the process of restoring and it is better than I thought it would be, well worth the time and effort as far as I am concerned.

Regards

[MamaVolpe]

Originally Posted by Shadow Papa

RESTORATION????? WHAT????

OK... I am very curious about THIS RESTORATION THING! Are you haveing a graft?

How the... What the???? Where is it coming... Huh?:

Sorry... I went under the knife and have always just accepted: "That is that."

Is it just cosmetic or does it start to bring back that lost sensitivity?

Regarding mutilation: Yep... I never thought about until DW asked what I wanted to do with DS. After doing just a little reading I was pretty much with the anti-mutilation camp.

But I had no idea that one could go back.

It is a gradual streatching of the skin until it makes a new forskin. Just think of how much your wifes belly streached when she got pregnant. Well skin everywhere streatches pretty easily. If you want more details just google it there are a lot of websites that will show you how or sell you devices to help you do it.

[ProtoLawyer]

My SO is cut, but he's also got significant eye damage from an accident. We don't have sons...but when I told my (Jewish) parents we wouldn't be circing if we did have a son, my mom said, "well, shouldn't he look like Daddy?"

My response: "That's a great idea. We need to find another drunk driver so his eye can look like Daddy's, too!"

They got the message.

[Shadow Papa]

Originally Posted by Greg B

Yes restoration! It works, and will return a great deal of sensation. From the reports of those who have gone before us, you will look as if you were normal, even to Doctors. But cutting and grafts are not the way to go. It is well understood that that path will only cause more problems.

Instead, the way to restore is to put tension on the skin. This induces cell division. The cell division adds new cells, and you get more foreskin. There are many ways to do this, more important is sticking to it. It takes years to complete, unfortunately. But on the good side, it can be an easy routine part of your day, and you (and your wife) will begin feeling the improvements in as little as a month or two. And the benefits keep coming along the way.

Feel free to pm me if you want more info, better yet, look over the many resources on the web. Lots of information and support available. I am in the process of restoring and it is better than I thought it would be, well worth the time and effort as far as I am concerned.

Regards

Thanks for the info and the offer to PM. I'm reading up on the net and discussing with DW. I may take you up on the offer.

VERY pleased to hear no knifes are involved... I mean... CRAP, MAN, THEY ALREADY DID THAT!!!!!

Originally Posted by MamaVolpe

It is a gradual streatching of the skin until it makes a new forskin. Just think of how much your wifes belly streached when she got pregnant. Well skin everywhere streatches pretty easily. If you want more details just google it there are a lot of websites that will show you how or sell you devices to help you do it.

Thanks for the info, too. The belly reference really helps establish a tangible image o how this process would work. 'cept mamma's belly is all taunt and sexy again. grrrrrr....

Hope that would happen to the regrown foreskin... that would just be creepy.

[vloky]

Originally Posted by oneboycircus

My wife (sorry I don't know all the codes yet haha) and I are have our first son soon and we are planning on not circumcising him. I am circumcised (sorry if that's to much information). I am sure I can just tell him if it someday comes up, that lots people have an operation and that is why it looks different, and that would be just fine. I just didn't know if anyone else had gone through this same situation and they handled it.

see, i can't even think of anytime this would ever come up. I never examined my moms genitals, ya know? Or my dads! Not that I can remember at least, and surely not close enough to compare!

[LeosMama]

My husband is circumcised. Our son is not.

When he was little more than 3 years old, he noticed that Papa's penis looked different. When he asked where Papa's foreskin was, Papa told him the skin bunched up behind the glans was his foreskin. This was the first real lie we've ever told our son. And I have mixed feelings about it.

We are not wanting to broach the topic of circumcision just yet. I don't think he is ready to hear about foreskins getting cut off of babies. This is really a horrible thing that is done to children, modifying their bodies in such an intimate, important way without their knowledge or consent. We don't want him learning about other forms of mutilation or torture just yet, either.

In just another year or so, I think he will be ready to start learning about it (as he asks about it).

[Greg B]

Just want to make one point regarding restoration. Restoration does not work by stretching the skin. It should be thought of as tensioning the skin. Sure some stretching occurs, but that is not useful. We need to grow more skin.

The tension creates conditions that encourage cell division. As new cells are added, the skin gets longer. This is why the skin gets longer....and stays longer when you are finished.

And from all reports of those who have completed this, if you grow enough skin, it will look just like a normal penis when you are done. But it takes a lot of skin and time.

Regards

[mama_in_PA]

My DS (almost 5 yo) is uncirc and has asked why my DF and his DS (both circ) look different. I told him the truth - the doctors cut off their foreskins right after they were born. Of course DS asked why and I explained that they didn't know any better. He was fine with that explanation. All families are different and we try to promote openness anywhere and everywhere we can. I will not lie to my ds but there have been times when I've told him that I didn't think he was ready to know certain things and that I would explain when he's old enough to understand.