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I started a Princess battle at preschool - Page 4

post #61 of 331
I think it is a bad idea to treat little girls as princesses. Has anyone noticed the onslaiught of "Diva" and "I'm so great" wear marketed to little girls? My SIL bought my baby daughhter of 4 months old a DIVA ONSIE.

I took a photo and then burned the onsie. (LOL, Not really but I did in spirit.)

I cannot imagine what kind of 12 year olds they turn into....or what kind of adults

"The Real World," "My Super Sweet 16" pop into mind.

I really do not encourage princess play at my house, but I wont deny them of it either. (Same with superheros/Army dude games)

It somehow "feels wrong" to my spirit...

I saw a Tshirt today for a young girl at Target, they were selling and it said: (I only remember 2 of them )

1. I say I want it
2. ???
3. You BUY IT.

On their website there is a T for a preteen that has a cute bunny pic on it and it says 'm Cute, Youre not, wow-I cant belive how well this worked out."

Why is it ok to be a bitc* on a t-shirt?

This is teaching a horrible sense of entitlment to our girls.

Is that what the fight was even about? I had to rant. Sorry.
post #62 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by transformed View Post
Why is it ok to be a bitc* on a t-shirt?

This is teaching a horrible sense of entitlment to our girls.
If it makes you feel any better, there are lots of "I'm a jerk and proud of it" t-shirts for the preteen boys, too. Some of them make me nuts, and I was one who wouldn't have thought twice about wearing a Van Halen "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" shirt to school...
post #63 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
If it makes you feel any better, there are lots of "I'm a jerk and proud of it" t-shirts for the preteen boys, too. Some of them make me nuts, and I was one who wouldn't have thought twice about wearing a Van Halen "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" shirt to school...
I always promised I wouldnt censor my kids like this....but I just cant feel ok about my little baby wearing a DIVA onsie! It makes her little precious self look like a total brat to me.

Or OMG, little girls with words on their butts.

I dont kow what happened to me. I am so not going to be a cool mom.
post #64 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kincaid View Post
Marketing to children is now a heavily oppressive phenomenon. If Disney picks up the rights to Beowolf, puts their own spin on it, and saturates the market with licensed t-shirts, lunchboxes, notebooks, pencils, toys, yadda yadda yadda... it becomes something other than a fantasy. It becomes a marketing force.
ITA. I used to work in a Montessori school that had banned licensed characters and toy weapons. I feel it was an appropriate policy.
post #65 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kincaid View Post
The preschool just sent out a mass e-mail reminding parents kids were not to have or wear anything Superhero. I wrote back to the entire list serv saying "How about we add Princesses to the policy also? Or simply changing the policy to no licensed characters."
I like it! And it's kind of silly for them to say that superheroes exercise poorer judgment than any other licensed character. They all have a rather exaggerated sense of themselves, no?

As a mom who lets her dd dress up as a princess (though we don't do the licensed character stuff), my issues with licensed character princess paraphernalia are a) they promote consumerism and consuming for its own sake, and b) the utter lack of imagination. Honestly I wouldn't care if dd wanted to wear a tiara to school every day (or a pirate hat, or a construction worker hat). But licensed stuff is about creating needs to shop, to buy more licensed stuff. There's already so much consumerism in school - school should be an ad-free zone where kids are encouraged to use their minds and imaginations.

So I think banning all licensed character stuff would be a great thing.
post #66 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kincaid View Post
I am so glad you all understand my point!!

I just want the policy to be fair and consistent. I don't allow either aggressive heros, or passive princesses, in my house.

I'm the only lesbian mommy at the school, so I am *positive* some of the parents are wanting to reply anonymous because they are saying "it's NORMAL for little girls to do this..." etc. As if I don't understand "normal" because my own sense of gender rightness is warped.
Well, they need to remember that it's also normal for little boys to be aggressive. Instead of remembering that they label them ADD and ban superhero play. :UGH whatever happened to boys will be boys?!

I'd personally go after them for banning superhero stuff in the first place. Why ban everything?
post #67 of 331
I agree with you princesses create their own gender stereotypes and frankly I do not see anything pretty about them. I feel they are kind of flaky and disingenuous. and do not even get me going about Barbie.:
post #68 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by transformed View Post
I always promised I wouldnt censor my kids like this....but I just cant feel ok about my little baby wearing a DIVA onsie! It makes her little precious self look like a total brat to me.

Or OMG, little girls with words on their butts.

I dont kow what happened to me. I am so not going to be a cool mom.
UGH I hate the writing on the butts for little girls. Sorry but I'd rather not draw peoples eyes to my little girls butt.

I wouldn't dress my baby in a diva onesie either. Barf.

Now if my daughter wants to play with Barbies when she's older I will let her happily. I saved all of mine from when I was little. I think people read WAY too much into them. Never once did I think I wanted to look like a Barbie. She's a doll. I never wanted to look like a cabbage patch either.
post #69 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by transformed View Post
I always promised I wouldnt censor my kids like this....but I just cant feel ok about my little baby wearing a DIVA onsie! It makes her little precious self look like a total brat to me.

Or OMG, little girls with words on their butts.

I dont kow what happened to me. I am so not going to be a cool mom.
I don't know if I'm a cool mom, but I don't think so. OTOH, I would probably let ds1 wear a snotty t-shirt - and deal with the backlash - but I absolutely will NOT buy one, and I'll talk to him about my objections if he ever does so himself. He does seem to get my issue with the putdown shirts and stuff, so maybe it won't be a problem.
post #70 of 331
I like the thread title so much, I think it's particularly appropriate for the subject matter.
post #71 of 331
I agree if they ban one they should ban the other. I don't have a problem princess or superhero fantasy personally but the policy should be fair to both genders.
post #72 of 331
My kids go to 2 different preschools - one has a ban on commercial characters of any kind on t-shirts, lunch boxes, etc The other simply has a "no toy weapons" ban....

I fail to see the "superhero" ban...if it's the aggression, then wouldn't their ban make it okay to dress like a pirate or something else violent but non-commercial? If it's "not using good problem solving skills" then they haven't read the same comics I have!

sorry you kicked up such a hornets nest but really, when you have something that is so gender-biased it's kind of inevitable....other schools have managed to address their concerns in a more "equitable" way.
peace,
robyn
post #73 of 331
We had a similar battle when DS1 was in his first year at school: the little ones were spending all of their playtimes playing superman (iow, running around the playground as fast as they can with their arms outstretched and their arms out of their coats) and the girls complained. THEN the play moved on to Power Rangers (which none of the kids involved ever actually watched- apparently it's just planned playfighting- and the school got involved and started actively discouraging the games. : Ironically enough, the headmaster at the time was a fairly weak head who supported and encouraged playfighting whilst not providing any support for the boys who were struggling socially with the pack rules- basically, if you started playing willingly at the start of playtime, it didn't matter how scared or out of control you got after that : By keeping out of it and enabling children to play naturally, you are committing yourself to a higher level of social education for those who struggle- especially with the boy games, where bumped knees and cross mummies are a natural consequence for the teachers- and some schools just aren't up to the challenge.
The little boys got their superman games back, btw- they went and spoke to the school governors meeting and the decision was made in their favour.
post #74 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShaggyDaddy View Post
Superman is an alien from a dead planet. His parents Jor-el and Lara Lor-Van sent him as a gift to earth and a last desperate effort to preserve the legacy of a race of people (kryptonians) who got too greedy to powerful to prevent their own planet from being destroyed (kind of like us). Jor-el was an inventor and a scientist, and he placed a great deal of knowledge and responsibility (save the human race) on the shoulders of young Kal-el.

He is tortured and alone, an alien with no family and no real humanity yet he spends his nights and days protecting us from whatever evil we can think of. He has incredible power, yet he is powerless to actually make his own life better. His fight is one of salvation for an entire dead civilization. He is a fascinating Mythological figure, and in my opinion will be studied in school soon enough. He is a perfect being, and still really has a lot to deal with. That makes it an incredible medium for commentary on people, take away all obvious physical frailties, and show how frail we still are even when we can fly, have x-ray vision, and are bullet proof.
Wow, I love it! So human and yet not human. He has always been my favourite superhero.
post #75 of 331
for the most part, I like superheros because they show the kidss "the good guys win" side....which is exactly what I belive and what I want my kids to belive. But I hate the fact that they are marketed so heavily-consumerism makes me sick! :Puke
post #76 of 331
There are potential negative associations with almost every type of childhood play. Superheroes are violent; princesses are passive, heard it. Superheroes are also brave, strong, proactive, confident. Princesses can be heads of state. Aren't those positive, empowering models? When we try to X something out of our childrens' lives, we then couch these things in purely negative terms; hampering their ability to approach these concepts in an imaginative way and reap the positive from it.
post #77 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jescafa View Post
There are potential negative associations with almost every type of childhood play. Superheroes are violent; princesses are passive, heard it. Superheroes are also brave, strong, proactive, confident. Princesses can be heads of state. Aren't those positive, empowering models? When we try to X something out of our childrens' lives, we then couch these things in purely negative terms; hampering their ability to approach these concepts in an imaginative way and reap the positive from it.
Princesses can be, but I have never seen them presented to children thaat way. Its always all about clothes and looking pretty and telling people what to do. (Thats the only kind of princess play I have witnessed)

But you give me a good idea to start with my little girl and teach her to be a "good kind" of princess!
post #78 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by transformed View Post
Princesses can be, but I have never seen them presented to children thaat way. Its always all about clothes and looking pretty and telling people what to do.
That'd be the head of state aspect. In my daughter's princess play, requests are often granted. This arguably is a model for good governance.
post #79 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jescafa View Post
That'd be the head of state aspect. In my daughter's princess play, requests are often granted. This arguably is a model for good governance.
I don't want to teach my dd to be bossy. Of course, I may have issues with the whole politics thing because I cant stand politicians.
post #80 of 331
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
If it makes you feel any better, there are lots of "I'm a jerk and proud of it" t-shirts for the preteen boys, too. Some of them make me nuts, and I was one who wouldn't have thought twice about wearing a Van Halen "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" shirt to school...
My two-year-old has a shirt with a picture of the solar system, only in place of the sun is the word "me." Below the picture, it says, "Center of the Universe."

On a toddler, I think that shirt is funny, because it's such an accurate description of the two-year-old worldview. However: I have also seen a grown man wearing the same shirt. I didn't think that was funny at all.
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