what are the chances

[punky monkey]

I have myself worked up over something I cant control. DP had a baby with another woman 5 yrs ago, however that baby died in the womb due to a chromosomal defect. The chromosomes didnt split right and she was still born around 20 weeks. Is this something I should be overly concerned with? They never found out who the problem was with, and after they tried to get pregnant and never could. The woman has never sucessfully stayed pregnant and every time she gets pregnant she miscarries. I plan on telling my dr and seeing if we can get an early ultrasound just so I can quit worrying something is wrong with my baby

[quarteralien]

Should you be "overly concerned?" No, I wouldn't say so. If they didn't discover it until 20 weeks, an early ultrasound won't tell you anything about it. All an early ultrasound will tell you is how far along you are and whether or not there is a heartbeat. The baby isn't well formed enough to show anything really. And chromosomes need to be analyzed by blood anyway, or more likely, chorionic villus sampling, which is a hugely invasive procedure, and has to be well worth the trouble in order to go through with it. And it sounds like, if this other woman couldn't stay pregnant, the problem could have been on her end. Or more likely, it was a one time fluke, and the chances of it happening again are the same as they ever were. Try not to worry too much. Easier said than done, I know, but I think your odds are very good of having a beautifully healthy baby next summer.

[prothyraia]

I know it's difficult advice to take, but don't worry too much. Odds are that everything will be fine for you.

Do you think if you did get an ultrasound it would make you feel better? Or would it not actually make a dent in the worry? Like quarteralien said, the only tests that can really check effectively for chromosome issues are invasive (and carry a small chance of causing a miscarriage). An early ultrasound is really only good for checking to see if the embryo is alive, how many there are, and how far along you are. Many OB's do them routinely for those reasons anyway, though.

[punky monkey]

Dp said they did some test and something looked off so they did an amnio which I really dont want. I dont want a an early ultrasound either but I do want a healthy baby. I am convincing myself it wasnt him and this baby will be fine, it still makes me worry. This baby wasnt planned but we both very much want it so we are both a little concerned. He was convinced it was him since they never got pregnant again and then after they split up I am the only one he has gotten pregnant. I think I will just talk to the dr and see what happens from there

[prothyraia]

Good luck!