Mothering › Forums › Breastfeeding › Lactivism › Baffled by the absence of BF in my community!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Baffled by the absence of BF in my community!  

post #1 of 21
8/6/03 at 11:22am
Thread Starter 
I just don't get it. I am a SAHM so I see lots and lots of moms and babies out and about, and I RARELY see anyone breastfeeding, regardless of the age of the baby. Plus most of the moms I meet never nursed, either.

I talk to my SIL in Boston and she tells me that most of the moms she meets do/did breastfeed, and many other people tell me the same about their hometowns, too. What is it about Long Island, NY that makes people run out and buy formula? It seems like the general attitude towards breastfeeding around here is just one of ignorance. It's not even negative, as in, "Ick, I hate breastfeeding," it's more along the lines of, "Nah, I'm gonna bottlefeed." And whenever these moms ask me questions about breastfeeding it becomes clear that they know NOTHING about it.

What gives??? :
post #2 of 21
8/6/03 at 11:35am
My SIL says the same thing about the Detroit subburbs. She plans to BF, but has not met ONE MOM who does (and she knows lots of mamas. They all bottle feed. She doesn't get it either. Yet here in Minneapolis, I meet tons of BF mamas.

One thing I can think of is the health aspect. Whenever I see lists of "healthiest cities" Minneapolis always rates high up there, where Detroit is always on the bottom. If people care about what goes into their own bodies, they are probably more concerned about what goes into their babies bodies? : I don't know, just a guess....
post #3 of 21
8/6/03 at 2:40pm
I'm in tiny town and I'm the only one here breastfeeding, I swear. For a while I knew another mom, but she was supplementing and now I think she's made the switch to all formula.

I found a LLL meeting in a town 45 minutes away...but it was there last one for a while since one leader couldn't drive in for them anymore and the other had a new baby and didn't have time to lead them. So there are meetings in another town 45 minutes away in the OTHER direction.

I work 40 hours a week and have two older children. Driving 45 minutes for a meeting sounds like a freakin' FANTASY. There are no LLL leaders in my town and no LCs advertise or list themselves in the phone book. In a town of 20,000.

I was seriously disappointed when you said you're in Long Island. I was praying you were HERE!!!
post #4 of 21
8/7/03 at 2:50pm
http://www.iblce.org/us_regional_registry.htm

to find ibclc near ou
post #5 of 21
8/7/03 at 3:07pm
Hey chelle - where in NeBraska? I'm from Omaha But was Born in Kearney. My mom said there was no Bfing support whatsoever. My sis, who still lives in Omaha, knows NOBODY who BFs! It's so sad.
post #6 of 21
8/7/03 at 3:12pm
outside of LLL or API meetings, i don't see other nursing mothers. lots of moms tell me -- when they see us nursing -- that they nursed for x months, or that they wanted to nurse and couldn't, but i don't see anyone else actually doing it. i guess i should just be thankful no one is harassing me.
post #7 of 21
8/7/03 at 3:28pm
Laurie...thanks for the link. But I've btdt. LOL When I say there isn't breastfeeding support here, I mean there is no breastfeeding support here. I'm it.

That's why I'm *here*.

Mon...I'm a bit more than an hour from Omaha. Your sister isn't making stuff up. My 6mo hasn't had anything but mama milk and people think I'm a freak.

And then they see my diapers. I'm a BIG freak. If I went veggie, I'd be punted out of state. (lil NE humor, there sportsfans).

Elph...I am grateful I'm not harrassed. That doesn't mean I can't be sad that I never see anyone else nursing a baby.
post #8 of 21
8/7/03 at 3:33pm
oh i wasn't being snotty to you or trying to invalidate your feelings! it's just such a sad state of affairs for people like you who are the lone nursers. i made the harassment comment because just this week a woman was asked to leave the mall (next town over) for nursing her 5-week-old. since no one has said diddly to me in our 22 months of nursing, i feel like i've escaped something others have endured.
post #9 of 21
8/7/03 at 5:28pm
Me too!

In my town, I have only ever seen one mom bf'ing her baby and that was when I worked at the Library.

I personally know two moms who pumped because of latch issues (one pumped for a year each with her two dds and the other pumped with a manual pump for six months with dd#1 and is still pumping at six months with a PIS with dd#2- she said next time she will make bf'ing work after watching me nurse ds).

All my friends at playgroup breastfeed for a year or more, but they're all in Bloomington which is where IU is. My town is weird. I get tons of compliments at WIC for breastfeeding, especially when I tell them dd nursed until 20 months (child-led weaning) and ds will nurse until he is done.
post #10 of 21
8/7/03 at 7:09pm
Elph...I understood what you meant and was commiserating! I didn't take offense at all. I was trying to validate our feelings. LOL

So much gets lost in pixelated space, doesn't it?
post #11 of 21
8/7/03 at 7:13pm
come over here! I've seen NIP of two and three year olds at parks as totally common place here.
post #12 of 21
8/8/03 at 10:34am
Thread Starter 
Glad to see I'm not alone!

I did see a mom in the children's museum nursing a child who was easily three years old, and I thought it was great. She was just sitting in the middle of the music room nursing. I just knew other people were freaked by it but I gave her a big smile!

I wonder if a lot of the women I see bottlefeeding are just afraid to NIP? I met a mom years ago who always brought a bottle of EBM with her because she was terribly uncomfortable with NIP...and when her son didn't get the hang of the bottle, she would nurse in the bathroom...
post #13 of 21
8/8/03 at 10:49am
I'n in South Jersey-which is highly populated, tons of colleges in and around the area, sop people are supposedly educated (tongue in cheek) and only in LLL do I see/hear breastfeeding. I bring up the subject and people freak. And rarely has anyone I known even tried, it is not a consideration out here. Friends who had hospital births were commonly told by their Docs-you have no milk! Some were BINDED!

It is horrible out here-horrible.
post #14 of 21
8/8/03 at 11:06am
I think education is another big issue. So many moms just don't know anything about it (and neither do their doctors!) There is so much mis-information out there, it's unbelievable.

I had called in to one of our assistant principals to help me get my schedule set so I can pump when I'm back at work. She seemed so embarrased about it, and was talking with the scheduling secretary while on the phoen with me and kept sayign to her "we've got to change her schedule because she has a MEDICAL CONDITION" So now the secretaries probably think I have some strange disease when all I want to do is feed my baby! :
post #15 of 21
8/8/03 at 11:51pm
We were talking about this exact issue at LLL today. Even a few years ago, there were always around 12 families at meetings. Now there are 4 regulars. And everytime I go out and see babies, their moms are always toting bottles. I go to a SUPERsupportive pediatrician (who always has an interesting new fact to share about the merits of bfing) and I just found out today that his wife didnt even nurse any of their 3 kids, because she 'never even considered that.'
post #16 of 21
8/9/03 at 4:48am
No one nurses around where I live (just south of Glasgow in Scotland), but I think there are lots of reasons not to see nursing moms/babies in the States.

I know several people who do disappear into a bathroom whenever they have to nurse - just not comfortable with NIP.

I also think that many, many more people nurse newborns than older children. A friend of mine weaned her last at 6 months. She's a pretty big breast-feeding advocate (as advocates go in places other than MDC!), but she'd had enough at 6 months.

So...you see her toting a bottle.

I would love to see more nursing moms near me - I got weird looks with the last one when I was 'still' nursing at 4 months. But at least most people we know are used to me around here, so they'll be geared up for (even if they don't approve!) how long #3 (due in 5 weeks!) will be nursing.
post #17 of 21
8/9/03 at 6:04am
While I do know quite a few nursing mothers, a lot of them stop at the 6 month mark and/or are uncomfortable nursing in public. I live in an area where I do see other nursing mothers. My LLL group has been a great way for me to connect with nursing mamas.

I think that there are lots of mamas who just son't nurse in public. I have one friend who nursed her babe for almost six months and I only saw her nurse him one time. She would hold him off for a bit and go home if he seemed hungry.
post #18 of 21
8/12/03 at 9:17am
Well I live in Shreveport/Bossier City, LA and there is no one who breastfeeds here. At least in the military. I do know some people personally(Charmie981 is my IRL friend) but in a town this large you would think that I would see thousands of women nursing. I am lucky though, that most of the women I know who BF, they do it for over a year. So I do sometimes see women who nurse toddlers. I wish I lived in a town that was BF, CD, natural-birth friendly. Is there such a place? Only in my dreams
post #19 of 21
8/12/03 at 2:17pm
You know, it's not so bad up here. There are definitely more bottles in play than breasts at your average public event, but dd and I are generally not the only ones.

And, here in Juneau, we don't get a lot of negative feedback (on the road is another story). I know that a lot of people disapprove, but "doin' your own thing no matter how crazy it looks" is sort of a religious belief up here. It usually benefits people who are building strange things in their front yards with blue tarps and duct tape, but I'm happy it seems to cover me as well.
post #20 of 21
8/13/03 at 3:54am
Quote:
I know that a lot of people disapprove, but "doin' your own thing no matter how crazy it looks" is sort of a religious belief up here. It usually benefits people who are building strange things in their front yards with blue tarps and duct tape, but I'm happy it seems to cover me as well
:LOL :LOL :LOL
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Lactivism
This thread is locked  
Mothering › Forums › Breastfeeding › Lactivism › Baffled by the absence of BF in my community!