Originally Posted by Nature
Do people normally let their children play at other peoples houses when they haven't met the parents first and gotten to know them? Because I know I don't.
Gotten to know them? How well?
My son just turned 11. He rides his bike or scooter all over the place, within about a three mile radius around town.
A couple of years ago, he discovered two brothers near his age who lived just down the street. Sure, i walked down there and met their mother briefly (we talked for maybe five or ten minutes, i let her know where we lived, told her to send my son home if they had other things to do, etc)...i didnt meet the stepfather that day. I did not tell my son "No, you can't play until i meet every adult in the home." Do you do that? How old are your kids? I did eventually meet the stepdad, and he seemed nice enough...but really, what can i tell in a five minute conversation? I relied on the relationship i have with my son, for him to tell me if anything "weird" was going on in that home.
My son's best friend lives across the street. We've "known" the stepdad for years, as he was the nice-guy bachelor that never got married...my sister knew him since elementary school, so no worries there. I talked to the mom for like five minutes (my sister had a more lengthy conversation)..i've never been in their home. They seem nice enough, but i wouldnt say i know them well.
How well do you get to know the parents of neighbor kids that your kids play with?
|I can see a million scenarios that don't involve pedophilia or illegal activity.
Indeed, pedophilia/illegal activity seems to be the one scenario you dont really want to consider at all.
Does this mom's instincts count for nothing at all? Really? Do you think when an entire group of people get creeped out by someone, its usually for no reason?
I think we should rely on the feelings of those who were actually in the situation...when i was in middle school, there was a teacher who would touch the girls. Nothing outwardly inappropriate...just a squeeze of the shoulder, "special attention", etc...if a teacher without the creep factor did it, it would be considered loving and supportive. But this teacher made the girls' skin crawl, esp the ones who were the target of his attention. For years and years this teacher was the subject of the kids' gossip/rumors, and yet nothing was done til probably twenty years later (when administrators started taking such allegations seriously)....i think there is something about our animal nature that allows us to pick up on "danger" vibes, and its REALLY important we listen to those msgs.