i am trying to figure out the middle ground on this. and would appreciate some more heads to give me a different point of view.
so my x wanted to raise our daugh a vegetarian (well actually non meatetarian - fish and eggs are ok) and i agreed i would to the best of my ability but that she would eat what i ate. that was when daugh was 18 months old. so i dont cook meat at home (i didnt eat v. much and even less after i said i would raise her as much as a veggie as i could).
and then when she was 3 she came back from thanksgiving with her dad and expressed how sad she had been that everyone was eating turkey (including her dad) and she got none.
that thanksgiving i told her dad we were at our friends place and they were serviing organic turkey and that i was going to give her some.
she is 5 now and he is mad that i am giving her meat. maybe once a month or less when i am out and i am eating meat. she does have the option of ordering meat when we are out even though i am not eating - to be fair.
so here is my deal. to me its not fair that i have a seperate rule for her and a seperate rule for me. that i impose my wishes on her. ask my daugh to not eat meat when i am eating meat in front of her. i have noticed that because of that reason meat has become a forbidden fruit for her. i talk about being vegetarian to my daugh and that that is my ultimate goal but once in a while i crave meat and so i eat it. that it is my failing. that i would prefer to eat nuts but cant afford to replace meat with nuts. we do eat a lot of beans. for me meat is giving into a craving. he is ok with fish and eggs which we do.
her grandpa (dad's dad) feels i am being unfair to my child. that as parents we have the right to watch out for the best interest for our children. and obviously veget is the better, healthy choice - even though the rules are different. and by me allowing her to eat meat i am making meat an issue for her - not her dad.
but to me its not so much about 'healthy food' but more about imposing my 'power' on my child. what i say is law. for me its so hypocritical to have different rules for my daugh and me.
what do u feel? is there another way to look at this. its ok if you differ from me. i would appreciate another point of view.
so my x wanted to raise our daugh a vegetarian (well actually non meatetarian - fish and eggs are ok) and i agreed i would to the best of my ability but that she would eat what i ate. that was when daugh was 18 months old. so i dont cook meat at home (i didnt eat v. much and even less after i said i would raise her as much as a veggie as i could).
and then when she was 3 she came back from thanksgiving with her dad and expressed how sad she had been that everyone was eating turkey (including her dad) and she got none.
that thanksgiving i told her dad we were at our friends place and they were serviing organic turkey and that i was going to give her some.
she is 5 now and he is mad that i am giving her meat. maybe once a month or less when i am out and i am eating meat. she does have the option of ordering meat when we are out even though i am not eating - to be fair.
so here is my deal. to me its not fair that i have a seperate rule for her and a seperate rule for me. that i impose my wishes on her. ask my daugh to not eat meat when i am eating meat in front of her. i have noticed that because of that reason meat has become a forbidden fruit for her. i talk about being vegetarian to my daugh and that that is my ultimate goal but once in a while i crave meat and so i eat it. that it is my failing. that i would prefer to eat nuts but cant afford to replace meat with nuts. we do eat a lot of beans. for me meat is giving into a craving. he is ok with fish and eggs which we do.
her grandpa (dad's dad) feels i am being unfair to my child. that as parents we have the right to watch out for the best interest for our children. and obviously veget is the better, healthy choice - even though the rules are different. and by me allowing her to eat meat i am making meat an issue for her - not her dad.
but to me its not so much about 'healthy food' but more about imposing my 'power' on my child. what i say is law. for me its so hypocritical to have different rules for my daugh and me.
what do u feel? is there another way to look at this. its ok if you differ from me. i would appreciate another point of view.
