Extreme separation anxiety...

[Oriole]

.. at 11 y.o.?

What would you think if you met a child who cried at school drop off in sixth grade?.. What would you think if you knew this child missed a couple days of school? How about if the teachers are trying to be as gentle as possible, and it still takes almost a month before this child can walk into the classroom smiling in the morning?.. What if you met the parents, and they seem gentle and caring from the first glance?...

What would you think...

[Strong Mama]

Awww your post made me sad I had to respond. I really dont know what to say, I hope someone has some ideas for you mama. ((HUGS))

[Oriole]

Thanks
It's not my child though... heh
I just feel bad for the kid, and I wonder why that would happen. Wanted to know other people's thoughts, and experiences. The girl has adjusted to school by this time, I just have never seen somethings like this, and I was wondering what might cause it.

[ledzepplon]

I wouldn't really know what to think without more info, but I would hope the parents are trying to address the issue?

[4evermom]

I would just think the child was very sensitive. Some kids come that way and nothing causes it.

[attachedmamaof3]

I would think that child was painfully shy and sensitive. Very much like my DP who grew out of it once he found sports in HS and found his "place".

My answer may be different if I knew more facts. For example, if this just started happening out of nowhere or if the child was always a bit reserved...or if there were unknown stressors, etc. If I (as the parent) had any concerns, I would begin finding a good therapist, perhaps just a safe place to talk to someone uninvolved...I don't know, I really don't..I'm sorry!

[Hopesmommy]

Originally Posted by 4evermom

I would just think the child was very sensitive. Some kids come that way and nothing causes it.

It's not exactly normal, but I would agree that some children are very, very sensitive and it takes them awhile to adjust. My eight year old is not quite this bad, but he almost is.

I've given him plenty of love and attachment, he's healthy, certainly not abused. I don't know.

I'd feel really sorry for the girl and try to help in any way that I could.

[Charitymama]

Maybe the child was previously homeschooled and it was her first experience with a public school? Maybe she has a history of abuse at school, at the hands of the other kids and/or teachers, and really doesn't want to be there? Maybe she's just sensitive. Maybe she is emotionally/mentally behind? Maybe a death in the family that is making it difficult to cope with being at school? Maybe if there was a death, and she had been previously homeschooled, her mother or father would all of a sudden be a single parent requiring her to be put into school. So she could be dealing with grief, loss, and a new environment. All sorts of reasons why a child would react that way.

[nextcommercial]

My friend's daughter has this. She is in high school now, and doing a little better. In Grade school, her mom would bring lunch to school every day and sit with K so she would never have to sit alone.

They won't have her seen by a specialist, but they have always suspected some type of social anxiety or OCD. But, they don't know. They don't want her on meds because they are afraid that it might turn into depression.

I felt bad for her, well, I still do. She's absolutely brilliant, but can't enjoy herself in groups or away from her Mother.

It is so bad, that if her Mother needs to be away from home, K will stay in her room until Mom comes home. Even though her Dad is there, she will still not come out on her own. The only other family member she is close to is her sister.

Yet, she talks about college and living on campus. So, maybe she has her own timeline, and plans to stick with it. I don't know.

[Magella]

I would think anxiety disorder.

Poor kid, that sounds so tough.

[mammal_mama]

Well, I had a miserable time in school, and I'm sure I hardly ever walked into class with a smile on my face. But by 11 I'd learned it didn't matter how I felt about it, I'd still be forced to go.

So the fact that this girl's still openly expressing her emotions, could be an indication she hasn't been hardened yet, hasn't learned to just push it all down and "get over it."

I wish her the best; I personally don't believe in forcing my children to be separated from me, so this kind of crying's not likely to happen at any age. At least it sounds like her parents aren't getting angry with her, or stealing themselves against her. I'm glad for that.

[rambunctiouscurls]

Maybe he/she is being bullied at school.