I hope this isn't too much of a downer thread, but I'm just curious whether you all experience this and what you do.
I'm not religious, and the holidays have historically not been a big deal to me (or DH), but it's been different since having DS. I'm not one to buy him toys very often, so I do have fun at this time of year picking out one special new thing to give him for Christmas/Solstice/Whatever. This year DH and I (or Santa -- no reason not to have fun with it
) are giving him the Plan Toys garage with a couple of trucks and people. He'll love it, I put a lot of thought and effort into picking it out, and I'm excited to give it to him. All good.
But there's the rest of the family. My family could be a cover story for mainstream America, including the concept that more is always better and that if it makes noise or lights up, that's ideal. I've spent the last holidays (and DS's birthdays, which is in Feb) trying to convince them that it's OK (even preferred) not to buy him anything at all, but if they must, to maybe not go for the light up, battery operated, character-driven, plasticky top pick at Wal Mart or Target. (Seriously, I would be much happier to see more thoughtful stuff that was made by them or gotten from a thrift store than the battery-powered Thomas Train on plastic track that does nothing more than spin in a pre-molded circle.) To no avail. My sister has two kids who are swimming in this type of stuff and I know she finds it insulting (or even hurtful) for me to suggest that the tons of toy-crap on her revolving credit card was not the best possible use of the bank's money, plus heart-stopping interest. We have several friends like this too, who insist on buying presents for DS.
And then there's all the MIC/recall concerns. Ugh.
:
Every year I've been torn between just not giving DS this stuff and immediately donating it to a charity (which I've done for the worst of the worst
and feeling like it's not my place to stand between someone's true desire to make my son happy and his right to make his own decisions on what he likes, or doesn't.
I know I sound ungrateful, and believe me, I am incredibly grateful that DS has so many people in his life who care about him and want to show it. But last year, at the end of Christmas, I just wanted to throw up.
What do you do?
I'm not religious, and the holidays have historically not been a big deal to me (or DH), but it's been different since having DS. I'm not one to buy him toys very often, so I do have fun at this time of year picking out one special new thing to give him for Christmas/Solstice/Whatever. This year DH and I (or Santa -- no reason not to have fun with it
) are giving him the Plan Toys garage with a couple of trucks and people. He'll love it, I put a lot of thought and effort into picking it out, and I'm excited to give it to him. All good.But there's the rest of the family. My family could be a cover story for mainstream America, including the concept that more is always better and that if it makes noise or lights up, that's ideal. I've spent the last holidays (and DS's birthdays, which is in Feb) trying to convince them that it's OK (even preferred) not to buy him anything at all, but if they must, to maybe not go for the light up, battery operated, character-driven, plasticky top pick at Wal Mart or Target. (Seriously, I would be much happier to see more thoughtful stuff that was made by them or gotten from a thrift store than the battery-powered Thomas Train on plastic track that does nothing more than spin in a pre-molded circle.) To no avail. My sister has two kids who are swimming in this type of stuff and I know she finds it insulting (or even hurtful) for me to suggest that the tons of toy-crap on her revolving credit card was not the best possible use of the bank's money, plus heart-stopping interest. We have several friends like this too, who insist on buying presents for DS.
And then there's all the MIC/recall concerns. Ugh.
:Every year I've been torn between just not giving DS this stuff and immediately donating it to a charity (which I've done for the worst of the worst
and feeling like it's not my place to stand between someone's true desire to make my son happy and his right to make his own decisions on what he likes, or doesn't.I know I sound ungrateful, and believe me, I am incredibly grateful that DS has so many people in his life who care about him and want to show it. But last year, at the end of Christmas, I just wanted to throw up.
What do you do?
