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Anyone not teaching preschoolers? - Page 2

post #21 of 47
Couldn't read without replying, Hi Erica!

We don't do school. Although dd1 is into some schooly things right now, but totally at her own interest. I just answer her questions. I know she would do terribly in a structured ps setting.

She would not like to be tested. I don't do the ask her questions to test her knowledge thing. When other people do (grandparents are good at this) she looks at them like, why are *you* asking *me*, don't you know?? She usually says nothing even if she knows, or says I don't know and asks them back.

She asks me what does this say, how do you spell whatever, but I would never take out some flash cards or a book and say, ok, what letter is this? Just not something I've ever done.

She resists "I know and you don't" ways of teaching/showing too.

About the colors-- if you want her to get more clarity, talk colors more. Use them as adjectives when you can: "Oh, I think I'm going to use this red Lego. - Hey! I like that orange shirt! - Let's put some socks on. Here we go, pink socks, pink socks, on they go, pink socks."

To get to the point, your daughter's doing fine. She's an active, bright kid. She'll continue to learn in her own way. Follow her lead and she'll go far!
post #22 of 47
My DD1 (3.5yo) absolutely loves "school" and everything school-like. She WANTS flashcards and worksheets with letters and numbers and colors and ALL of it!

BUT she has major problems with being "wrong" - getting the wrong answer, saying the wrong letter, not being able to write the letter "correctly." So we have to be VERY careful to keep things playful with her.

She does go to preschool because it's part of the daycare program we use, but at home I don't do anything other than reading with her and showing her what she is asking for (i.e. she sees a picture of a kangaroo and asks what letter does it start with, then how do you write a "K", etc.). As far as the at-home stuff goes it is totally child-led. Yes, I try to read her stories that are 1 step ahead of her to see if she is ready, but if she's not, we back up.

Another thought. If the flash cards are nice and big and she can play with them on her own, get 2 sets and call them a matching game. Let her play on her own and with you. Name the cards when you find a match. Ask "Hmmm, what color is on your card?" Just be playful. If she is interested, great! if not, great!

Both my DDs (3.5 and 2.0) love to pick out their own clothes to wear and name the colors, so I use this to reinforce what they already know. With DD1 I'm starting to teach her the odd-ball colors like burgandy and navy blue. BUT she is ready for this. DD2 will say light green and dark green, but has no interest in forest green, and cannot distinguish shades of blue. This is fine! She'll get there when she gets there. If it's at 3yo or at 5yo, it will be the right time for HER.
post #23 of 47
What's the label for a 4yo who isn't going to go to school?

We don't do any school-y work at all and dd who will be 5 in feb has only just begun to be able to use numbers for counting, got her colours straight about 6 months ago but is great at talking, very opinionated and her ltter formation is just beautiful.

We do ordinary things every day like shopping, talking, cooking, talking, reading, talking, walking out and about and more and more talking.

The skills of being able to read and then write down your own ideas is secondary to being able to communicate verbally at this age and there s so much to talk about! Having said that, my ds2 was famous for being a boy of few words even at 5yo but his words were always apt!
post #24 of 47
My youngest ds is 4 years old and there is NO WAY I'd be able to get him to sit still long enought to "teach" him anything. If he even senses that I'm trying to "teach" him, he's outta there, lol!!

BUT, he knows his letter sounds, he can write his name as well as other other letters. And he LOVES to do so! Those things, he didn't learn from me though. He learned them through daily stuff. His letter sounds came with watching leapfrog letter factory dvd and he started writing letters by just copying everything he saw.

Now. next year for kindergarten, I'm alittle stressed, b/c I plan on doing a curriculum with him (only takes about 30 min/day) but I don't know how I'm going to "teach" him. He's shown me he's his own boy, lol!! Who knows though, by then things will be alot different!!

HTH alittle bit??
post #25 of 47
My youngest just turned 4 and we're not doing any preschool or school with him. He just lives life and plays. He's learning all the time. Some of my biggest educational hopes for my kids are that they remain self-motivated and creative. Those traits are the ones that will help them in schooly pursuits down the road. As a former training consultant and instructor in industry, I've never had a problem with people following instructions and waiting to be told what to do. I have had a problem with people being unable or unwilling to think outside of the box and take initiative. I see that kids already possess self-motivation and wacky creativity so it's important to me to foster it. I foster it by largely staying out of their way.
post #26 of 47
I'm currently not teaching my second preschooler, and not teaching my first grader! It's still working amazingly well! Just living life, my oldest daughter is reading quite fluently, having fun manipulating numbers, and delving deeply into her interests. My current "preschooler" is going about it more slowly than her older sister, but is still "average." She recognizes several letters, is playing with rhyming words, and can count and recognize several numbers. And she has learned these things as we go about living our lives, not from any lessons. I'm going to continue not teaching my upcoming "preschooler," my one year old son, who is currently learning how to walk!

As someone else already pointed out, preschool as something every kid does is a recent thing. My siblings and I didn't go to preschool, and we all did well. I think it's sad to see academics pushed down into preschool. Let kids be kids and play! And that goes for well into childhood!
post #27 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by mama2cntrykids View Post
My youngest ds is 4 years old and there is NO WAY I'd be able to get him to sit still long enought to "teach" him anything. If he even senses that I'm trying to "teach" him, he's outta there, lol!!

BUT, he knows his letter sounds, he can write his name as well as other other letters. And he LOVES to do so! Those things, he didn't learn from me though. He learned them through daily stuff. His letter sounds came with watching leapfrog letter factory dvd and he started writing letters by just copying everything he saw.

Now. next year for kindergarten, I'm alittle stressed, b/c I plan on doing a curriculum with him (only takes about 30 min/day) but I don't know how I'm going to "teach" him. He's shown me he's his own boy, lol!! Who knows though, by then things will be alot different!!

HTH alittle bit??
YES! my ds is the exact same way!!!!! he knows all of his colors, letters, numbers, etc., but it didn't come from flash cards or lessons through me we have preschool programs we watch, leapfrog videos, games like lucky ducks, hi hi cheerio, guess who? etc.

i'm not an unschooler at all, so when he's kindergarten age, i will slowly start a routine with him, but i will never expect him to to do "seatwork". i suspect his learning style will continue to be through play and hand-on for quite some time to come.
post #28 of 47
ITA with Riversky; 3yo is way too young to teach a child to hate learning.

I honestly dont get why we have any standards for what a child should know by any age.

OP, your DD will learn all the colours and shapes and even the periodic table of the elements and calculus, in her own time.

to say a 3yo needs flash cards to get up to speed would be like putting a 7mo in a walker so they'll start walking early. might as well buy the kid a car and start driving lessons :

no need to do anything fake. no need to talk in colours. no need for flashcards. just love living life
post #29 of 47
We occasionally sit down and DS's "desk" (a little table in his room for drawing and painting) and do worksheets and things like that, but only because he likes to do it from time to time. He enjoys playing school. I have no idea where he got this idea about school, though, as he attended a preschool for four days last year before we had to pull him for medical reasons, but they do play based not flashcards and worksheets.

I consider myself home educating him at this point, but it really isn't much different than what I did before we had to take him out of preschool. We cook and clean and paint and draw and hike and just talk about the things around us. I am working on colors with my 2YO DD the same way as I did them with DS. When we paint, I talk about the colors she is using. When we get dressed, I do the same thing. When we do things, I just mention the colors that we come across. I don't push it or make it seem like a "lesson." I just figure that eventually, she will put them together. DS and I do math and reading in similar ways. I just talk about things and ask fun questions throughout the day ("We had four apple slices, but you ate one. How many are left now?") He tends to tell me when he doesn't want to play games like that, so I just drop it at times like that.

Learning should be fun for her. Hopefully, it can be fun for you, too. Let her show you how she likes to learn and go with it. There will be plenty of time for structured learning later in life, unfortunately.
post #30 of 47

not "teaching" 4 yr old (or 7 yr old for that matter)!!! AND a RANT!

Neither of my kids have ever been to preschool or kindergarten, and dd certainly has not even started gr 1. The most formal thing they ever have been to was a toy lending library program/family resource center with me and there certainly was not an academic bent there.

I too let my kids play, and trust that they will learn when they are ready. I guess it helps that my "preschooler" is the younger one and I have been through this all before and am more "trusting" as it were that they will learn when they are ready. Like a previous poster suggested with their child, my dd was (and still is occasionally) scared of being "wrong" and I have learned to back wAAaaAaaay off on her...very private about reading although now I can detect she is quite fluent at her "grade level", would be furious when she wrote a letter "crooked" until she realized her peers write just as "bad" as her (and I wasn't even being pushy in the first place), and she still awes me as to what she learns WHEN SHE IS READY and when I trust her.

Therefore, I am more "trusting" of ds, and more relaxed and not analyzing every interaction as it being "educational" or not, and everything "flows" more. Ds too has learned his colors just through informal conversation and over a long period of this now can identify pretty much anything. He has grasped mathematical concepts the same way. I have just tried to follow his interests, for example, I've noticed he has started randomly counting lately, I can see he grasps he has two trucks or whatever, so I have made a point of getting more counting books out...he grasps it because he has the interest at this point and it is much more "natural" than deciding he must learn "x" at a "y" age and meeting resistance.

I guess I am just living an unschooling/child led learning-joyfully-discovering-everything-with-my-kids lifestyle because it feels right, and I see my kids learn best without an overt curriculum plan and we are going to learn this TODAY and meet a learning "objective" because **I** feel it is the right time (otherwise, they balk...they would NEVER do well in a formal school setting! )

2c before I go. I think we worry way too much about academics and learning at an early age, and even at older ages too. Look at all those philosophies like Waldorf or the writings of Ray and Dorthy Moore or David Elkind (The Hurried Child, Much Too Early, etc) that encourage delaying it, it is SAD what your laws like NCLB have done. Canada overall doesn't push it as much I think, at least we don't have formal federal laws, but that day is coming, I think :

We as adults (product of our schooling perhaps) analyze and categorize and lay the yardstick along kids and dig the round hole to jam their square peg selves in for our "own" reassurance, to ensure that we are "doing right", to relieve our own anxieties about how they will turn out because we are trying to guarentee a result (all in the class-of-20 have all met the objectives at the same time) that is impossible...each child is unique, learns at their own pace, whether we like it or not.

Just my rant...

off my soapbox, everyone carry on now...
post #31 of 47
Thanks for that rant, canuckgal ita
post #32 of 47
I never taught my last one anything out right. We did work on colors just because it made my life easier. (No . . your brown shoes...Pink does not match. you get the yellow plate because it doesn't have gravy on it . . . . your sister gets the green plate because she will cry if she doesn't) but we never sat down with color flash cards or anything. really a child would have to be pretty sheltered not to learn their colors, shapes, body parts and counting by the time they were 5 or so.
post #33 of 47
DD is 3 1/2 and has, what I believe, is ADHD. If I tried to do anything structured, I'd fail miserably. I am looking to unschool her anyway. Trips to the grocery store are fun for her. She loves to play with her little sister, watch educational TV programs, and read books. She has the best imagination ever and plays dress up. She helps me put away silverware, gets her own cereal, and sings songs to her baby sister. She knows her colors, can count to 20, knows her ABCs, and how to match her clothes. I love it! I really thought raising a smart child would be such hard work but given time she picks up on everything like magic.
post #34 of 47
My four has workbooks and access to all the supplies my nine does. she likes to sit with her sister and do "school" but that is her. She has also involved herself in composting, cooking and loves to be read to so I guess the answer is "yes" she does school but I don't look at it that way. I am all for practical life and Montessori.

As for my almost 3, he colors, knows his colors but there is no way he would sit through flash cards. No shcool for him now. Digging in the dirt is more important.
post #35 of 47
No, you're not the only one. My daughter is 3, and I'm not teaching her. I know it's shocking and hard to believe , but somehow all my kids have learned how to walk or talk without being taught, and a plethora of other things as well. I just think it's ridiculous to waste time with the unpleasant task of making them sit still for school work when it's something that they're going to pick up naturally anyway.
post #36 of 47
I don't teach my 10 year old, so I'm not likely to sit my 3 year old in front of a workbook....
post #37 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by canuckgal View Post
We as adults (product of our schooling perhaps) analyze and categorize and lay the yardstick along kids and dig the round hole to jam their square peg selves in for our "own" reassurance, to ensure that we are "doing right", to relieve our own anxieties about how they will turn out because we are trying to guarentee a result (all in the class-of-20 have all met the objectives at the same time) that is impossible...each child is unique, learns at their own pace, whether we like it or not.
I just have to say that Canuckgal's post was fantastic!

The teaching I do with DD is involving her in real life activities. She's involved in most things DS does and she learns because she's interested in joining in with story time, washing dishes, doing the laundry, counting items, sorting toys, making crafts, playing outside, etc.

Whenever I hear people saying they homeschool their preschoolers, I always think "Well, of course you do!". Preschoolers learn from real life everyday activities which, to me, is the heart of homeschooling.
post #38 of 47
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone!! I'm so glad to have MDC moms!! You guys rock!! Maybe we are different from others around us, but I'm glad to not be alone!!! Thanks ladies!!
post #39 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by leewd View Post
Another thought. If the flash cards are nice and big and she can play with them on her own, get 2 sets and call them a matching game. Let her play on her own and with you. Name the cards when you find a match. Ask "Hmmm, what color is on your card?" Just be playful. If she is interested, great! if not, great!
That probably wouldn't have interested my 3yo dd much, but she loves UNO. That's a great game if you modify the rules a bit for the little ones, since it really only involves matching colors or numbers. We have two sets, one regular set and one with peanuts characters, so she can match characters too. It's a fast game with 2 people, and she mostly seems to win for some odd reason. Candyland is also great for colors. Chutes and Ladders is great for numbers. Mancala is good for counting, etc. I've been accumulating quite the pile of games. But she always wants to play games with us.

But even with no "teaching" here, she's learning to count in her 3rd language(from Dora!), learned simple addition from Math Circus, learned about octagons and "STOP" from I don't know where yet. I do let her watch dvds or PBS. She has access to some workbooks, but I don't really spend time with them very much at all. I actually tried hiding one, but she likes drawing in it.
post #40 of 47
even with my oldest two kids, who went to public elementary school, they didn't go to preschool, nor did we *do* preschool.

They learned their colors by picking out the "red" apples at the store, or putting on the "blue" shirt or throwing the "yellow" ball. They learned to count by buttoning their clothes, getting their nails clipped, or counting cars that we went by. We sang songs, read books, played, created. Living Life seemed to be a really great teacher for my preschoolers.
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