I'm planning for DD (4yo) to be at the birth. When signing the paperwork for a homebirth last week, DH said "but what about DD" as if that would somehow be harder if it were a homebirth. I told him that I was looking into hiring a doula for her/us. DD is looking forward to helping at the birth by bringing me washcloths and water.
I just wish we had a "better" support person for her. My first two choices just aren't possible and we're new to the area and don't really have friends yet and I can't imagine having our parents at the birth or anywhere near me at that time. My first choice was/is my brother's girlfriend, but she is starting a new job in July and can only really help on the weekend (hear that baby, come on the weekend!) and my second choice wasn't so serious, but was my cousin. I thought it would be neat if she could come stay with us for a month and care for DD, but she's not really old enough and would absolutely need support of her own, so that doesn't really help.