or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Fertility › Family Planning › Just getting started -- reassurance??
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Just getting started -- reassurance??

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
HI

We finally decided to go for it and stop the Pill. Dh-2b leaves, in less than 12 hours, for GA and training. It is now 15 weeks till the wedding; we will not see each other again untill the night before the wedding which will not be spent togeher.

I am going off Pill tomorrow and I have ordered takeing Chagre of Your Fertility by Toni. I will STUDY with much care. I plan to start charting and everything NOW; so I have 3 months to pratice. But after being on Pil sooooo long not sure if I will have a regual cycle back by wedding. Cycle was regular, but long 38 days or so, before pill. That was a looong time ago.

I know there are thread on the pratical workings; and I promise to read them once I read the book and understand them...........

What I am looking for now are success stories. Some assurence this is workable; and not toooo difcult?

I have been on Pill since 91. I am really wanting to do this. We will TTC in about 2 years and I do not want Pill effect ; well effecting us. I think that would be too hard emotionally for me. BUTTTTT at the same time I had; as we all did, drummed into me in HS "just one time with out BC.....".

We have agreed; as part of agreeing to use NFP that is we get pregant; even right away, we are FINE with that. I am already 31 and we want a family sooooo getting started now, if that is what God chooses, is great too. Buttttt udeally we';d like to wait at least 9 months to get relocated and in a house. Actualy I suggested NFP after wedding; dh02b said NFP after we are in a house (9 to 12 months); then 2 days later HE came to me and said NFP now (well after wedding since I am here and he will be in GA -- 17 hours apart for 15 weeks); and if we get pregant that is a good thing; we aren't so young, might as well get started, his view of it, and we are ready $$$ we just wanted to be settled; and selfishly spend more US time.

sooooooooooooooooooooo a "mistake" would be ok; not a tramua..............but...............still nervous.

Comments?

Aimee
post #2 of 8
I haven't used NFP, but I just wanted to say when I quit the pill, I was pg about 6 mos later- my cycles went back to normal right away. I had been on the pill for over 10 years at the time I quit taking it. I quit to become pg and the dr told me to wait until I had one cycle off the pill to get pg.

I read taking charge of your fertility and found it very interesting. I was bf when I first read it and not ovulating, so I thought it would be hard and we decided to get pg anyway. I'm thinking of trying again at NFP, as we're pretty sure we only want to have 2, but don't want to do anything permanent just yet. It seems pretty easy to figure out.

Good luck with everything.
post #3 of 8

Successful for 3 years and lovin' it

Aimee,

This board provides a great community to ask questions, view charts, etc. Welcome!

I have been using NFP for 3 years, and it is awesome! NFP is like the FAM that TCOYF teaches, but we abstain during the fertile phase. It is *totally* workable. My sleep pattern is crazy and my job keeps me on the road all the time, so I was worried it would not work out well. But it has been wonderful, both for my body for our marriage. It has generated unexpected responses from my friends who wonder when I went from Preppy to Crunchy. I find this really funny ---- why are they mutually exclusive? : )

The daily CM observations will become second nature, just something you notice when you go to the bathroom. The temperature can be something you and your partner do together. When we used a mercury thermometer, my DH would be in charge of "shaking it down" each night, and making sure that I awoke with the alarm. Now that we have switched to a digital thermometer (which takes about 15 seconds), he makes sure that the alarm is set, and hands me the thermometer. So, you see, we practice NFP together. He knows my cycles as well as I do, and often is the one who analyze our charts. There are a number of good sources out there who can you ask for help examining your charts, too.

Natural birth control is usually a joint effort between you and your partner. Some friends who switch from the Pill to natural family planning have shared that they no longer carry a burden about always being the responsible one. Both NFP and FAM are both 97%+ effective in preventing pregnancy, and they can be immediately reversed to achieve pregnancy without any side effects. Your success rate will depend on your dedication during your fertile phase, as to whether you choose to abstain or to use artifical BC. The few folks I know that have found themselves unexpectedly pregnant admit to "taking chances", having sex during their fertile time, or not charting/reading their signs. whenever we have been in doubt, we just wait a day, and see what my body does. This has worked for us.

A lot of women share that they feel more connected to their bodies, more in control of their fertility (hence the title, I guess : ) ) , and as an added benefit, their communication with their partner usually improves. Here is a fun stat --- couples who practice NFP (I am not sure the number for FAM, sorry) have a very small divorce rate, about 2%. So, by getting off the Pill you could be improving your marriage before it even starts. There is no big secret why it works so well to foster a better relationship. You and your partner communicate regularly, and on such a intimate level, that you will likely be more in tune with each other. Having said that, there are always exceptions. You don't have to go natural to have a great marriage -- but what a great "side effect". Let me now if you want to know the source of these stats.

Congrats on taking such a healthy step.

Palmetto
post #4 of 8
Thread Starter 
Pal,

Thanks for all the support and encouragement. I got my book Takeing Chare of your Ferility today and will start studying tonight. Scott left Monday for 16 weeks. I will not see him again till wedding. sooooooooooooo I have time to pratice and study. He was hesitant about the switch at first; but after he thought about it he came to me and said he was ready. I am not off the Pill and we will use NFP when we are again together. Not sure if we are going to abstain or use condoms; I am going to go with him on that one.

If you could post any POSTIVE articals or that research you were talking about; I'd love to share with him to reassure him I am not just sneaking a pregancy in a year before it is planneded. :

Again thanks.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and as I start reading the book watch out for my questions; there will be a lot.

Aimee
post #5 of 8

Links for Statistical Effectiveness

Aimee,

Sorry I am so tardy with my reply. Last week's virus plus some out of state travel made it diffuclt for me to log on : )

Anyway, you asked for the resources:

1 - The Couple to Couple League (www.ccli.org) has a little book for $1 that reviews medical studies. Also, their guide to NFP provides a wealth of sample charts, and has whole chapter that addresses this subject. I have not investigated the fine print at the back, but they do have links to the actual medical studies. Great resources!

2 - The Families of the Americas (http://www.familyplanning.net/index-home.html) has conducted a great deal of research of the methods. I called them a few months back and they sent me copies of the actual studies. Here is a link to their stats sheet. (http://www.familyplanning.net/index-stats.html)

3 - I found this website that is a portral of sorts with lots of links, and it has a page on effectiveness (http://nfpsite.port5.com/effect.html).

4 - Mother Teresa taught this method as well. There may be some research online?

On a related note, there are studies linking the Pill to increased risk for some types of cancer, and the Pill may act as an abortifacient. Perhaps these details would also interest your fiance? BTW, let me know if Scott would be interested in speaking with a guy, you know, getting the guy's perspective. I am sure my DH would be glad to chat with him offline.

Well, that is a good start. Keep us posted...

Palmetto
post #6 of 8
Thread Starter 
Thanks.

I am lucky, Scott went for the idea with a great ease. The first time I brought it up; he asked me to wwait till Feb when we'll be in IA (he is GA right now and I am in MO; at some point I will join him in GA then in Feb or Mar wi will be in IA). I agreed; grated is we made a mistake I don't feeli like being prgant in two moves, and temp houseing. A few days, 2 I think, he came back to me and told me "honey lets do it. Go off the Pill". He pointed out we want a faimly and I am not getting younger; so if God belesses us NOW as opposed to in 6 months it won't bother us. He agrees with me about getting off teh Pill and getting my body frug free before we TTC> I didn't want to wait a year to go off the Pill, and THEN have to wait to get drug free and for cycle to return. I wanted to let my body recover NOW wheile we aren't trying; soooo went we do decid NOW we are READY right then. He saw my logic. I am not shareing the "bad pill" stuff with him; I do not want him to worry about me being on it so long now; no point, and i won't be going back on it. For a while we will be relieing on God and BF to space the babies as we want a family. Once I hit 40 we'll talk about what to do then.

Thanks for the support.

Aimee
post #7 of 8

Aimee, that's great!

I used FAM in combination with a diaphram for 5 months followed by 10 months of NFP to concieve my second. It helped me to identify my short luteal phase and take corrective action! It was also great to know when to expect my moon to arrive.

Baby Nova is now 17 months and I am ecologically breastfeeding. I just recently noticed a change in my BIP (Basic Infertility Pattern) so I've started charting again. So far I'm still in LAM! :-) Anyway, there's a great book out about Ecologically Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing, I highly, highly recommend it.

Enjoy your journey.
post #8 of 8
Thread Starter 
What do yo mean by Ecologically Breastfeeding??? Sorry to sound stupid!

Aimee
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Family Planning
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Fertility › Family Planning › Just getting started -- reassurance??