If momma ain't happy...

[pdx.mothernurture]

Have you ever heard the phrase, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"?

In a discussion about whether cesareans were preventable, I came across this:

The best possible start for a baby is a happy mother, not how the baby is born or if she breastfeeds or uses a bottle, and so on and so on.

How do you think this mentality relates to circumcision and what can we, as intactivists, do about it?

Jen

[carriebft]

I see two ways of approaching this problem.

1) Recenter the focus onto the child. I guess this is a lot of what AP is about, but, as we all know, not everyone is going to accept AP or the ideas behind it.

2) Make circumcision a problem for the mother. Talk about the problems it will cause the mother-- fussy baby, baby in pain for days, extra work at diaper changes, possible extra trips to doctor, money spent, breastfeeding troubles, manipulation of their son's penis to prevent adhesions possible for years...

It's sad that we have to go with option 2 with so many people

[hubris]

Originally Posted by pdx.mothernurture

what can we, as intactivists, do about it?

We can help people to form a different idea of what constitutes "happiness".

For many people, "happiness" seems to include staying within their own comfort zone without any regard to whether or not the things they believe are actually true or healthy. The idea is that whatever we're comfortable with is "right for me and my family." THAT is a poisonous idea, IMO, and THAT is where we need to start, whether we're talking about educating people about circumcision, birth choices, breastfeeding, gentle discipline, or any other aspect of parenting.

Children deserve parents who are self-confident enough to climb outside their comfort zones, seek out information, give their beliefs a long, hard look, and change if necessary.

Sometimes a mother might be just as "happy" if she just changed her point of view - and her baby would be much better off for it. You can have a happy mother *and* make the decision that's truly best for the health of the baby - that's what we need to communicate with people.